SierraLea wrote:One thing you can ask yourself about the situation. Whose experience of the mass will be more enriched by your presence?
For example, my sister sometimes talks with her friends during mass if she sits next to them. This takes away from their experience with the mass. However, if I sit next to someone who I know is having a rough time with something, I can be on hand to help them if they start crying or need a hug, which enriches their experience in the mass. I'm not saying being with your friends is a detriment to entering into the mass. Just think about who needs you more during that sacrament.
K. Ayato wrote:First off, you're over 21. You shouldn't be too upset over what your mom may or may not approve of, even though you still live with her under the same roof. Second, stop and take time to look objectively at yourr motives for going to one church over another. As has already been asked, is wanting to see your old friends the main reason for going to their church? Don't beat yourself up if the answer is yes. Be okay with telling God you want to meet in a place of worship and focus on Him, but you're also aware that being in the presence of those friends might take your focus away from learning more of Him when it's time to listen and learn.
If your desire is to learn about God regardless of which church, then it shouldn't matter too much if you go with your aunt or with those friends. I myself attend services at one church 3 times a week and a Bible study located at another toward the end of the week. Like yourself, circumstances are such that I'm living with my parents again, but they're not against me going to a study elsewhere.
And about your friends, respect your mom's opinion of them, but don't let the guilt trip fool you into thinking you're rebelling against her by spending time with them. Instead, try to give her the benefit of a doubt. Maybe she sees something about them that is still not clear to you yet. You did mention they're not always very clean and tidy and appear to always ask for money. I don't blame your mom for being suspicious if those things are true. Again, respect her and give the benefit of a doubt. It could be she just doesn't want you to get hurt and the fact your friends appear (in her eyes) to be users more than useful is a valid concern on the part of a parent.
Sammy Boy wrote:I have no answers for you, but perhaps could suggest a few things for you to think about:
1. Have you had a heart-to-heart conversation with your mom about your feelings and thoughts in this matter, like the way you have described these things? If not, it might be a good idea to do so.
2. I have not met many people who attend church for 100% pure, noble motives such as wanting to know God. Most of the time, it is also because they enjoy the company of the people that are there. Many human beings are social in nature, it is natural to want to enjoy other people's company.
Don't put yourself on a guilt trip just because you also happen to enjoy being with the people whose church you wish to attend.
Have you tried attending both your aunt's church and your friends' church at least once each, then making a decision?
3. Do you mind clarifying on what you mean by it being your fault if you did not listen to your mom, and she passed as a result? Who told you that it would be your fault, and why is the person or people who told you this correct in making such a claim ?
Finally, just a minor point I wish to make - you might want to try breaking up your post into paragraphs in future. It would make it easier for other people to read. Thanks.
Jigzy wrote:Then she starts saying that I love them more than I love her or I would listen to her.
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