Might not be dead, but it's sure a bloody pulp

[Slater]

My soul, that is.

I've been a lying, hypocriticle, slandering, lusting son of a gun lately, and it sure is taking its affect on me... hard.

I feel dead inside... more dead than I've ever felt. Sin has come into my life and I've done nothing to stop it... maybe prayed once or twice at most, but that's it.

I guess my gf could sense that I was beginning to feel that way a few days back, and so she wrote me a love letter. I read it, but I didn't read it... it had too much Scripture in it, and I couldn't understand it. Reading the letter turned me off because of that... I feel like a sick child who's rejected his medicine because it tastes bad... like someoen's trying to heal my wounds but unwilling because the ointment stings.

And that's really scaring me, that I've lost my appetite for Scripture. It's really bad... now every morning I wake up and going to work is a drag cause I know it will be a greuling day... I never felt that way before. I told my dad that I didn't want to go to church today because I was "too tired."

I see my non-saved friends feeling down and I want to comfort and help them, but I can't find the strength to do so anymore... That kind of thing used to be effortless.

So... here I lie, drained of all energy and will to live... having a hard time even telling my gf that I love her still. I really don't care if I don't wake up tomorrow, but I know I will, and whatever the day holds I'll have to face, somehow. I want to experiance life and be with those I love, but I don't want to live if I'm dead on the inside.

[Warrior 4 Jesus]

Slater, kudos for having the guts to admit you are struggling with your sin. God's grace is there waiting for you. He's by you every step of the way, rejoycing in the good times and weeping in the bad.

I believe God's crying out to you. You've admitted that you are dead in your sin and you need his help. He won't let you down. Keep on praying and reading the Bible and reaching out to others even if it doesn't seem to have the same energy it used to.

There are times of dry faith in our lives and we have to learn to trust God all the more, put all our worries, hopes, fears and whatever into his hands. I've been there (to a lesser degree than you but still). I suffer from medium depression and severe anxiety and just trusting God to his Word is a struggle in itself. Sometimes reading the Bible helps but other times its useful to talk to a friend about your struggles, God also.

God made you, he loves you and he wants the best for you. This may be a time of character building, molding and shaping your faith, who knows? Only God.

Try to trust in him always. He will never let you down. Ask for help from friends and family. If they care enough they will help you.

I'll pray for you mate and I hope you continue to keep your faith in God and realise life is precious and that people care for you.
God Bless mate!


Christian

[TrigunX89]

I will keep praying, Slater.

[holysoldier5000]

I have once been in the situation you have been in. Do not worry you can get out of it. Just trust and obey the Lord... even if it doesn’t make sense. Abraham, Daniel, David, Job, and many other OT figures trusted God even when it did not make sense. Just trust and obey and remember that you have a Friend in Jesus that cares about you now more the ever.

What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
all because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged;
take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden,
cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge;
take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In his arms he'll take and shield thee;
thou wilt find a solace there.

[K. Ayato]

I'll be praying. I know what it's like to lose interest in the Bible. It's gonna take effort on your part, but since you've been honest with your situation perhaps picking up a Bible again won't be too difficult. Anyway, we're here for ya.

[SonicRose]

I'm always praying for you Nick. Keep in God's Word and prayer... Ask him to draw you nearer, to lift you up, strengthen you.

2 Corinthians 4:7 But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.
8 We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;
9 Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed;
10 Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body.

[Rambo]

Ya prayer is the weapon not the solution F.R.O.G. Fully Really On God, God is the answer. always!

[Silent Hunter]

Well, i'm not sure what all to say besides pray, start reading psalms, and talk to your pastor/youth pastor. Those people have been set by God to be shepherds to the so called "flock" that is us believers. Their answers aren't always right, but they should have better advice than I'll be able to give.

I'll pray for you.


- shorty -

[KA1-EG13]

A drying of the faith does bite a whole lot. But Jesus has promised that he will niether leave or forsake us, and the good work that he did start in you he will finish. You can count on that.

So I'll be praying for you too.

[Destroyer2000]

You helped me a while back when I was going through the same thing; life is certainly not a smooth road. So many bumbs and troughs in it, and near as many crests. Just trust God. I'll pray.

[freerock1]

And even though you're struggling, don't forget what the Bible says about who you are in Christ. You're a son of God (Galatians 3:26), a friend of Christ (John 15:15), a saint. You are a new creation, the old things have passed away and all things are made new (2 Corinthians 5:17). That's not to say that we don't struggle with sin and sometimes even stumble into it occasionally, but it doesn't define who we are any longer.

Lifting you up, bro. And if you need to chat privately, my PM box is always open.