Forgiveness....

[Alice]

I've been thinking a lot lately about how important it is.

I heard a preacher once say, "Forgive at all costs." (Because of that verse in the Bible about how you have to forgive or God won't forgive you.)

Today at church, a visiting preacher said, "It's up to each of us how far we go in God. Don't hold grudges, because that will hinder you in God. It's Satan's attacks anyway, not people's. Don't stay made at them. Forgive."

Anyway, I wondered if anyone had anything to add to that. I'll try to find the verse I mentioned and edit it in later or something.

[Warrior 4 Jesus]

Forgiveness doesn't help only the other person, if you forgive them it frees you up too. But forgiveness is the key and although it is difficult, yes, it is the right thing to do.

[ChristianKitsune]

I agree with W4J as well as you, Alice..

I recall the Verse when Jesus says, something like, "Forgive those who hurt 77x7..that is approximately...

*jeapardy theme song plays..*

539 times... LOL..after 10 minues of figuring..

So, yah.. I myself tend to forgive pretty easily..because I HATE feeling hatred towards others..it just feels so..wrong... and as a Christian.. I want to love my enemies and those that have hurt me...

[Swordguy]

in james it speack sof loving your enemys and praying for those who persucute you... forgiveness sounds simple but can be one of the hardest things for a person to do...to forgive someone even before they ask for it...to lover yourself acording to the world... but it is something Christ has asked us to do and as Christanronin said our nature starts to aline so much with God that we can't hold a grude for too long...it eats even more at us...

[shooraijin]

Actually, I'm embroiled in a forgiveness versus efficacy issue right now as we speak.

One of our classmates in residency flaked in a huge way last year. She slept through calls, leaving work for others, or didn't show up for them, leaving others to pick up the slack (and received nothing for it). She came in late, didn't do her work, got yelled at by attendings. As her officemate, most days of the week I wanted to have her strung up from the ceiling. She saw me saying grace once, and I never heard the end of it; I never brought up politics either, but during the Bush-Kerry election, she literally gave me a letter saying "Friends don't let friends vote [whatever my political party is]" despite my never saying that was my affiliation.

Eventually, the answer came out when she walked by the addiction medicine MD one morning post call bleary-eyed and disoriented. He took one look at her and ordered a urine drug screen on the spot. It was positive.

She's been out since then for about nine months in recovery programs and this is actually her second offense for drugs and alcohol, we learned. The medical board has reissued her license, but under significant restrictions and with supervision required. During this time, myself and the other chief resident simply altered the schedule and worked with one less resident.

Now, she's coming back on a reduced schedule. And while I forgive her (admittedly grudgingly) for belittling me in the office for my personal convictions, as the co-chief resident I do not want to be put in a position of having to depend on her again to hold her side of the load up. That means more work for us if she were to flake, and most of the attendings won't work with her anymore anyway. The difference between forgiveness and trust is a very fine line, and right now I'm trying very hard to walk it.

Christ probably would have trusted her, or at least would have seen where she was at and made His decision. I wish I had that kind of crystal ball before I write her into a position where she would need to be relied on again. Forgiveness is easy to say. Functional trust is hard.

[ChristianKitsune]

I agree, Shooraijin... Forgiveness can be pretty easy...but TRUST..eek that is another thing..

I have this friend of mine who is a few years older than I am, we hung out a lot during her senior year in High School and into her first year as a "colleged aged" Person.. But during the course of Last year and into this year...during my year as a junior which was last school term, After so many "I will call you's" or "I want to do something with you." offers..and me calling her time and time again, and her hanging up on me... it got pretty hard to deal with.. I mean, I have forgiven her, well, beacuse she has a life now, but Trusting her is another story. I know when she tells me to call her she won't answer. even if it is only a few minutes after... it is soemthing I have come to expect.