Postby SManBeyond » Mon Nov 15, 2004 2:13 pm
There's no easy to way to introduce this two-pronged prayer request, so I'll jump right into it. It's kind of a long one, so bear with me...
I've found a romantic interest here at the college I go to. I will not go into great detail to describe her (as most infatuated people could go on and on about how the person they like is perfect), suffice to say that my spiritually mature friends that know her think very highly of her.
However, she's not in my fellowship (I know her because she's involved with an interfellowship group I'm a part of on campus...PM me if you want to know more about it), and she's an Art Major in the Architecture School here, so she's pretty busy and I don't see her outside of that. Needless to say, I don't know her particularly well, and in particular not well enough to feel that I could ask for some "alone time" (i.e. lunch or dinner to get to chat one-on-one as friends) with her without it seeming sketchy. So I need to focus on getting to know her well in the group setting of our interfellowship group meetings (a prayer meeting on Wednesday night and a planning meeting on Sunday afternoon), and therein lies the second problem...
In real life, I am a particularly shy person. I do have a very extroverted side. It usually comes out when I'm with my family but not anywhere else. Also, I'm not particularly quick or witty in groups. It also takes me a long time to formulate questions or responses to share in our large group gatherings, so I'm quiet most of the time. In informal large groups, I find myself not really wanting to share or participate, as I'm afraid that since I'm not particularly witty on the spot, what I'll say will sound extremely simple, obvious or just stupid. I finally got a good hard look at myself and realized that that's pride and fear that I need to work on with the grace of God...so basically, unless I conquer that fear and become more comfortable participating in large groups, I'm not going to get to know her (not that that's the only reason to do so, as I now feel that it's essential to my growth as a person and as a disciple in Christ...)...
So, I have two main prayer requests out of all of that.
1. Please pray that God would help me to trust that if she's that God has ordained for me, then He will work these things out for me and will help me to get to know her in His time, and that if it's not, He will provide me the best. I have a subconscious fear that God will let me marry someone that's not spiritually mature, pretty, etc...which is a stupid fear, but it eminates because I've seen a lot of spiritually mature Christians who ended up with spouses that were probably not the best...
2. Please pray that I become a more extroverted and friendlier person in large group settings.
I would greatly appreciate prayers, advice, PMs, etc. during this time. I may or may not keep this updated. Thanks for reading this.
"Love means to love that which is unlovable; or it is no virtue at all." G. K. Chesterton
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