Most of us have to this certain realization in life at one point or another - Satan and his followers try to attack us through our weak points and draw us away from the Lord. Most of us know at least one of our weak points, too. For me, as I've discovered, my greatest strength and my greatest weakness is the compassion I have for those I love. I don't like to disappoint - I live to make people smile, and I'm very often tempted to do things I shouldn't do in order to make my loved ones happy. It's one of the greatest things I've struggled with this past month, as in a span of a week I discovered that both my best friend and my boyfriend have very inappropriate feelings for me.
On one side of the coin, I decided to tell my boyfriend that maybe we should cool it for a while so that we don't distract each other from God. But on that same token, I eventually found that I was tempted to...well, admit some things to my friend that I know I shouldn't admit. I was upset and frustrated, and I prayed and prayed for the Lord to help me with this entire situation. And for a little while, I felt like he wasn't going to answer. In fact, today I was almost convinced He wasn't going to do something until I signed onto IM and started chatting with Conner, a friend of mine I had met through a message board.
If there's one thing I can say about Conner, it's that he's an amazing guy. He's several years younger than me, but he's had an amazing influence on me. While we were chatting earlier, he sent me several songs by Michael Tait, and...wow. The lyrics to the songs seemed like they were written just for me, just at the moment where I needed them most. And now I know God was always there to guide me, even though I felt like he wasn't there.
So...long story short, I praise God for sending Conner's message to me today and pulling me out of that nasty hole I had fallen into. I haven't quite resolved all of this in my head yet, but I'm getting there and I know I'm going the right way. So please continue to pray for me, my boyfriend, and my best friend.
Oh, and I feel like I need to say this for some reason: even though I don't reply to all of your posts in this forum, you're all in my prayers.