I'm going to post something long-winded again.
Right now, it looks like you need to take some time off CAA and 'God time' to put more into schoolwork. School, family, eating, sleeping are things that
cannot be put aside. While 'God time' needs to happen too, there is no set amount of time you must spend on it. Twenty minutes of Bible reading every day is an acceptable amount, depending on how busy you are with school, family, etc. Shortening 'God time' doesn't mean you're failing God. You're just becoming more aware of how many hours are in a day, and that you just can't do as much of everything you want to. That's part of growing up. However, CAA--and the rest of the internet--is an entirely optional occupation of your time, and since it eats up so much of it, should be one of the first things you take hours from.
My dad once told me, "Stop worrying about doing it 'right', and just do it." It was good advice. He was talking about some [advanced] skiing at the time, but it can apply to a lot of other things as well--writing, drawing, putting aside 'God time', and prayer, to name a few. For those things, there is no single, universal way of doing it 'right'. With writing, some people outline; some just plunge in head-first. With 'God time', some will take fifteen minutes for Bible reading plus another ten for meditation on what they've read; others will read exactly two chapters, then ponder them throughout the day. Both can work, depending on the person.
I guess I'm agreeing with what others have said: stop worrying so much about whether what you're doing is what God wants, the 'right' thing to be doing. God doesn't tell everyone to do the same things, and He doesn't show everyone the same
way to do things, either. That's because we're all unique, and even when we're all trying for the same thing (example: pleasing God), we do it in different ways. That's why there's no 'one size fits all' rule for how Christians should live their lives. Some will doubt their faith, and come back years later all the stronger. Some will have strong faith throughout their lives, and study to get a deeper understanding of God. Some will go through cycles of spiritual strength, alternating months of regular Bible study and prayer with months of doing neither and feeling cut-off. Some will be completely different. I believe God accepts them all.
So figure out what works for
you, how
your head works. Not the imaginary, perfect "good Christian girl". She's made-up, she's not important. Don't worry about how you measure up to her, because she doesn't exist. Focus on what's reasonable for
you.
TheMewster (post: 1505927) wrote:OK, so should I try again so I can make Christian music in UTAU?
Far as I can tell, you're not going to get into any trouble for doing it, so try again if that's what you want.