Dwelling over this - prayer needed

[AnimeGirl]

Hey guys,

I apologize if this post may be a bit long, so if you have time to read, thank you!

There's been something that has been bothering me, and I would really like some prayer. Not too long ago, before I turned 18, people have been asking me what I am going to do when I get out of highschool, like what to take in college and whatnot. Actually, even now, I am probably going to get that question more. To be honest, and I ALWAYS answer honestly, but I always feel like their responses pierce my heart. Usually, to avoid the question, I say "It's up to God what I will do" which is TRUE, I am still praying about my calling, and whatever He wants me to do, whether it involves my dreams or not is His decision, and in the end, Heavenly Father knows best. But their responses makes me feel like it's wrong to have dreams. I tell them I am interested in art, but it's not "practical". I honestly want to be a manga-ka or singer. Not anyone famous, just use what gifts the Lord gave me for His will. There really isn't anything college has to offer to fulfill those needs. And I also want to reach Japan, though I don't talk about that much, 'cause who knows if they might shoot me down on that, I don't know. Reaching Japan is one of my missions I keep to myself from certain people, and I also try to avoid the "college" question altogether. It burns me because it's almost like they're saying I'm not talented enough. There are people who have an artistic career and do just fine, and yeah, you need talent to be able to do that, so when I hear that, then I feel like I can't do anything, even when I get encouragement from others, it almost becomes meaningless, even when the good comments outweigh the bad!

Do I think college is wrong? No, by all means, some professions require a college education! Is college for everyone? Certainly not! Especially when the profession you want doesn't require a degree! It's not that I don't care about education, I do think it is important, I want to finish highschool (kyaah!! And this is my last year, too), I really do! It just sort of hurts when I feel certain people are pushing me towards something I don't want. Will I do well in something I was forced to do? I'm pretty sure the answer is no. Anyway, now that you know the story, to the main point of this....

Dwelling over this has not helped me at all. Last night in my e-mail inbox I got the JFH weekly devotional. I haven't been reading them lately, sadly, and just been saving them in my "Saved Mail" for the past 10 weeks, but today....this one, I felt I should read. So I opened it. It was about being free from dwelling over an offense. If we keep dwelling over such things, God can't use it. And it's true! I've noticed that me dwelling over this has made me not only more depressed, but useless! I say I want to be an artist....but guess what? Because I am too busy dwelling over this, I haven't really been drawing any manga pages! Manga doesn't come from nowhere, it takes effort. Plus I haven't been practicing piano as much as I should. If I want to make beautiful music, I should know how to work the instrument, right? So dwelling over this only makes things worse! I'm glad God showed me that. In the devotional, it talked about praying and telling God all of our hurts and worries, which I haven't been doing.

So my request is this. Please pray that God will guide me to the right path in my life and help me. That He will show me how to use my talents, that He will help me to stop dwelling over this and get to work! Thank you so much for reading and praying, it means alot to me. God bless! ^.^

[jadeTheshade]

praying right now. i know what it is like, dashing off into life without a map or a falshlight or even a snack...XD
but often God uses the fact that we have absolutely no idea what to do or what is going on to his glory. which is what it is all about.

[AnimeGirl]

praying right now. i know what it is like, dashing off into life without a map or a falshlight or even a snack...XD
but often God uses the fact that we have absolutely no idea what to do or what is going on to his glory. which is what it is all about.

Thank you so much! It means alot. Yeah, it is hard not to know what God wants for us, but as long as He;s at the wheel, we just need faith and trust, and it'll be alright.

(I don't know why, but seeing your avatar right now kinda cheered me up XD!!)

[mechana2015]

I'm going to pray for you, but I'm also going to encourage you to look into arts education of some sort after you graduate. Professional singers and artists for the most part do have formal educations, and colleges are some of the best places to find mentors for both vocal training and visual arts, and make connections that can help you both with traveling to Japan and creating manga and music, but pray on it and focus on graduating high school first.

If you do decide to go to a college, the next major application period to start fall '11 is October or November of this year, at least at the university I work at. It may be worth it to take a break as well and wait a year to see what you feel like doing after you finish high school as well, but pray over it and we here at CAA will pray for you as you go through this process.

EDIT: Rushia pointed out that she's Creative Writing and RD is Illustration. I also have a creative degree, a Bachelors in Fine Arts in Graphic Design (BFA)

[ShiroiHikari]

Don't let anyone tell you it's wrong to have dreams. If you want to do something, then do it, no matter how "impractical" it may seem.

[Nate]

Man I am going to look like such a jerk when I post this... :\

But their responses makes me feel like it's wrong to have dreams. I tell them I am interested in art, but it's not "practical".

They're not saying it's wrong to have dreams. Here is the problem. If you focus on drawing manga or whatever, what are you going to do for a living? Are you just going to live with your parents and be a bum and mooch of their income? The point is that to become financially successful as an artist is possible. No one's saying it isn't. But it's not usually the case.

In other words, you have a dream to become a manga-ka. Awesome! Chase that dream! But, until that dream is fulfilled, what are you going to do? How are you going to pay your bills? How are you going to buy food? How are you going to make rent?

They're worried that you may be chasing a dream that's going to end you up in the situation I'm in right now: unemployed, living with my mom, and generally being a useless waste of life.

Most artists/comic book folks (and probably even manga-ka) have a job to get them a paycheck while they work on their art and try and make it big. So what your friends are saying is, drawing manga is nice, but try and do something that will also allow you to get a steady job.

There really isn't anything college has to offer to fulfill those needs.

How do you figure? I know a girl on this site who was majoring in something music-related and training to be an opera singer. After...um, some stuff happened, I lost touch with her so I don't know where life took her or if she achieved that goal. But there's definitely plenty of music-related programs in college.

There are people who have an artistic career and do just fine, and yeah, you need talent to be able to do that, so when I hear that, then I feel like I can't do anything, even when I get encouragement from others, it almost becomes meaningless, even when the good comments outweigh the bad!

Having an artistic career has nothing to do with talent. If that was the case, Rob Liefeld would never have gotten famous and rich. You probably don't know who Rob Liefeld is, but he's a terrible artist who became one of Marvel's best comic artists because everyone at the time liked his work, mostly because it was different from what had been in comics until that time.

There's also fantastically talented artists who never become famous or rich and work their entire lives at some dead-end job. The phrase "starving artist" is a cliche for a reason. It isn't talking about their artistic talent (there are some wonderfully talented artists who can't pay rent) but the fact that it is difficult to be an artist and be financially successful.

I feel like I keep repeating myself. Again, they're not trying to insult your talent. I realize it feels that way, and my reinforcing it probably doesn't help because you'll say "I know that but I still feel this way." Which is something that happens to me all the time. But I still think it needs to be said. Success or failure has nothing to do with your talent as an artist (although of course, being talented helps).

It just sort of hurts when I feel certain people are pushing me towards something I don't want.

Welcome to real life.

See, this is why I said I'll sound like a jerk. :l I don't mean that in a mean way, but what I'm saying is, this is what happens in life.

I hate to go all "YOU HAVE IT EASY BECAUSE THE BIBLE" and stuff but I mean remember when Abraham was told "Go kill your son." Man he didn't want to go kill his son but God was pushing him to do it. So he was like "Man this really sucks but I gotta do it." Of course, we all know in the end he didn't actually do it but the point is he would've if he hadn't been stopped, and he certainly didn't want to kill his son but hey that's what God was pushing him to do.

I'm also not saying to give in and accept what they're pushing you to do. Of course not, that'd be silly advice. Definitely strive to do and be what you want! But realize that sometimes the people pushing you are trying to help you, and also realize that life isn't always everything you want, sometimes you have to do things you don't like because the world sucks.

I think that's all the stuff I can say. I'm saying this so I can try to be helpful...although I do realize, I'm bad at expressing myself and so this may come off as harsh, though I don't mean it to. I wish I was better with words. x.x

Also, since a couple of people have posted since I started this, I just wanted to say,

Professional singers and artists for the most part do have formal educations, and colleges are some of the best places to find mentors for both vocal training and visual arts, and make connections that can help you both with traveling to Japan and creating manga and music

Mech here is absolutely right. Like I said, I knew someone on this site training to be an opera singer professionally by going to college. There's art and music colleges, too. It's not REQUIRED to do these things to become famous...after all, look at Miley Cyrus who isn't even old enough to go to college and she's a famous singer (mostly because of her dad though, but you get the point I hope).

EDIT: Also I am bad at thinking of how to end posts.

[LadyRushia]

You'd be surprised at how much formal education there is for "impractical" arts. I'm a Creative Writing major, for instance. Also, degrees in "impractical" fields like English, Music, and basically any humanities type of thing are actually more useful than people think. You can apply the skills you develop majoring in those areas to pretty much anything.

There are many, many schools that have illustration and art programs. It's really not too difficult to find something. The fact of the matter is, you can't improve at anything creative all too well if you don't take classes in that field. This is true for creative writing, visual art, dance, music, and it's really true for every other field out there.

RadicalDreamer is an illustration major herself. I'm sure she'll be able to be more detailed about what kinds of classes and programs are out there for artists. In the meantime, it might not be a bad idea to see what you can find on your own.

EDIT: Nate posted some things that I wanted to add to.

If you focus on drawing manga or whatever, what are you going to do for a living? Are you just going to live with your parents and be a bum and mooch of their income? The point is that to become financially successful as an artist is possible. No one's saying it isn't. But it's not usually the case.

This. One of my biggest dreams is to make a living off of writing, which may or may not happen. In the meantime, I'm doing writing-related things that will get me some practical experience that could be useful later (i.e. working in the Writing Center on campus, writing for the school newspaper, doing a bit of web freelance writing to earn a minimal amount of money, building an online platform which you can see in my signature, etc). Am I still working toward my goal of being published? Of course I am. Right now, the poetry editor for an online magazine is interested in possibly publishing a poem I submitted a little over a month ago. That's one step closer than I was before when other places would give me rejection notices. The point of saying all this is to emphasize the fact that getting anywhere with the arts is a long and often slow process. You do need something to do in the meantime while you slowly build yourself up.

[AnimeGirl]

Thank you so much, guys! I have heard of art schools, and if I did, I'd want to take that, but I'm also afraid of lack of support v_v

@Nate & LadyRushia: Concerning the comment about what I will do in the meantime. Yeah, that's something I forgot to mention in the post, sorry XD!!! When I said I wanted to be an artist, I didn't mean THAT'S IT! Like I do want to have a day job, otherwise, how will I pay the bills and have money for materials? I have thought about that, and probably want an oridinary job and such, since art does take time. And hopefully I will find a job that won't eat up too much of my time either XD!!

[Radical Dreamer]

Like many others have said, plenty of colleges provide programs for art students. Also like a few others have said, I'm currently enrolled in an illustration program at the school I attend. I am also in the middle of working on a project for said illustration degree, so I'm going to give you a few (hopefully) short pointers before heading back to work. XD

One, don't give up on going to college just because it's not something you want to do. Certainly pray about it, but look into going to college as well. In the job market that we have today, having a college degree can be very important in getting a career, regardless of what you choose to major in. So don't shun the idea of college just because it's not the first thing you're thinking about! XD

On college, definitely look into the art programs of several schools. It's not always necessary to go to a super expensive art school to get a good education in the arts. Like I said, I'm enrolled in the art program of a liberal arts school, and I'm getting a fine education; in fact, I'm actually in a sequential storytelling (graphic novels, comics, and storyboarding) class right now, so there are definitely art programs out there that will help you out!

On doing things you don't always want to do, that is sadly just part of life. XD Even in my own art program, I've had to take several very difficult courses that weren't fun and that I didn't think would be very beneficial to me in the long run. As it turns out, some of those base-level courses are really the foundation for everything an illustrator does when making decisions about a piece of art, a comic book page, a composition for a storyboarding image, etc. So even if you may not want to go to college, you may find that it'll be a lot more helpful for you in the long run, and will help you improve your skills immensely!

Finally, always always pray about decisions like this first. You may feel like God is leading you in a different direction, and that's perfectly okay--you're right that not everybody goes to college. But before you make a decision like that, look into all of your options, and maybe God will show you something you weren't expecting! I'll be praying for you!

[AnimeGirl]

^ Thank you so much!

Wow, I didn't know they had art classes like that. I wonder if there is a college that can teach me how to do manga better, 'cause seriously, I'll admit....I can use ALOT of improvement, like how to better draw joints, clothes, and....BACKGROUNDS! And yeah, I shouldn't totally push college out, especially if such programs you're taking exists. But the problem is....I feel like people are pushing me to take a career I REALLY don't want *coughNURSINGcough*.

[Radical Dreamer]

^ Thank you so much!

Wow, I didn't know they had art classes like that. I wonder if there is a college that can teach me how to do manga better, 'cause seriously, I'll admit....I can use ALOT of improvement, like how to better draw joints, clothes, and....BACKGROUNDS! And yeah, I shouldn't totally push college out, especially if such programs you're taking exists. But the problem is....I feel like people are pushing me to take a career I REALLY don't want *coughNURSINGcough*.

Well, one of the key things you'll find in a college illustration or art program are life/figure drawing classes, which will seriously help you in drawing the human body. XD Many of your drawings may lean towards a more life-like style in early classes, but learning that will help you to be able to stylize things in a much smoother way, while also being able to pay attention to anatomy that you may not have even noticed before! So figure drawing is awesome. XD And another thing you'll learn about in an art/illustration program is perspective, which will help you create realistic backgrounds so much more effectively. XD

On being a nursing major vs. doing what you're passionate about, definitely follow what you're passionate about. You can be a nurse who makes a lot of money, but if it's not what you're passionate about/it's not what God wants you to do, it won't be worth anything to you. I believe that God gives us passions and talents in order to have us use them for His glory, so if illustration is a career you really want to follow, then go for it! XD

[Atria35]

^You'd probably have to look long and hard to find a college that has programs specificaly aimed at manga- but since manga is the japanese word for 'comics', I can guarantee you'll find something on doing comics. And basic art courses concentrate on the anatomy, so that's the place to start. You can't get into a lot of the higher level courses (like those for illustrating and storyboarding- classes you'd need in order to do manga professionally/better) without taking basic art courses.

Again, those courses exist at almost every college. It shouldn't be too hard to do a little research and see which ones near you do. Even community colleges offer them.

If you don't want to do nursing,that's cool- how about saying you want to be a teacher? An ART teacher? XD But seriously, think about things you enjoy doing, other than art and singing- and take a career path based off of those. Just take your art courses at the same time.

[LadyRushia]

I won't be quick to assume that English and Art degrees will mean the same thing to an employer in the real world, but something that I hear a lot is that there are more job opportunities for an English major than one would initially think. Just as the field of writing isn't just limited to novels and poetry that you submit in hopes of getting published, art and illustration isn't just limited to comics and stuff like that. Plenty of businesses could probably use someone with artistic training and talent to create advertisements or design logos. Publishing companies, for example, need someone to design book covers. That kind of decision is almost never left to the author of the book. I may be mixing my disciplines here (there are differences between graphic design and illustration), but the big point I'm trying to make is that you can branch out within the artistic field and find a career or something to support yourself while you work on your dream stuff outside.

[Radical Dreamer]

(there are differences between graphic design and illustration)

XD There are actually less differences than you might think! Graphic design and illustration use the same methods to create an aesthetically pleasing composition and color palette, and the require the same design elements, like balance, repetition, flow, etc. within an image. Illustration just requires you to draw it yourself. XD That being said, though, it's actually great to be an illustrator within the graphic design world, because you can sell yourself as being able to draw your own designs.

All of this to say that if you get a degree in illustration, it's likely that you'll be able to land a job in a graphic design agency and have a lot of options open for what you can do to simply make money while you're working up to your dream job. XD

[goldenspines]

There are people who have an artistic career and do just fine, and yeah, you need talent to be able to do that, so when I hear that, then I feel like I can't do anything, even when I get encouragement from others, it almost becomes meaningless, even when the good comments outweigh the bad!

Actually, you don't need natural talent to be an artist. You just have to be willing to learn and work very hard, putting all you have and more into learning more and more about your craft.
I echo what others have said in this thread about education. Learning all you can about all styles of art (not just manga) will benefit you greatly in your drawing skill. There's no "stopping point" for artists when they don't need to know more. It's actually a sign of maturity and devotion/passion when you want to learn more about your craft.

You should be aware that any area of study in the arts will make you put in more effort than it will give back to you (in money, that is). This is why most people worry when someone says, "I want to be an artist/musician/actor!"
No one can "force" you to do anything you don't want to. But, you must accept that since you are growing up, you are responsible for making your own choices in life as well as being responsible for accepting the consequences of your choices. Your dreams will not be served to you on a silver platter (as awesome as that would be), you will have to work harder than you probably have ever worked before. But keep your trust in God and stay strong on the path He leads you down.
I'll be praying and rooting for you. ^__^

You'd probably have to look long and hard to find a college that has programs specificaly aimed at manga- but since manga is the japanese word for 'comics', I can guarantee you'll find something on doing comics.And basic art courses concentrate on the anatomy, so that's the place to start. You can't get into a lot of the higher level courses (like those for illustrating and storyboarding- classes you'd need in order to do manga professionally/better) without taking basic art courses.

This is mostly true. Basic art classes usually focus on drawing what you see (whether it be anatomy or still life). But, being able to look at something then draw it, and even change it up a little, is a very valuable skill to have, especially in manga (concerning backgrounds, especially).

Side note: I only know of one art school (in Japan and it's very hard to get into as well as expensive) that gives a course in the art style of manga, but the degree also requires other fields of art study (such as painting, sculpture, etc.)

[Tsukuyomi]

There's many options out there ^^ You just have to be willing to find them! Of course, I'll be praying ^^

You mentioned there may be a lack of support.. You should go for it if you can find an art class ^^ Remember, you're the one talking the class.. Not them ^^

[ABlipinTime]

Hey, God will take care of things. Remember always to entrust it to Him. Take me for example: I applied to different schools and got accepted into one I hadn't applied for until the last minute. Two years later, I considered transferring to another school and just barely slipped back in to the same one before the semester started.
Sometimes God will give you a peek at various things/places/majors(degrees/degree programs) or people just so that you can see what things are like and see how good HIS plan for you is. So I encourage you, have confidence that God will take care of your situation. As Jesus said, "Not a single sparrow falls without your heavenly Father knowing it. How much more will He take care of you?" (or something to that effect)

[AnimeGirl]

I'd like to thank you all for your prayers. I'm feeling alot better about this, and I am ACTUALLY DRAWING AGAIN!! I have 5 pages sketched out so far, and I feel the manga I am working on will actually be finished to it's end. Although my fanbase for it is not huge, I am thankful, because I have loyal readers who are like family to me and I'm always looking forward to what they have to say. I know God has a plan for me, and He'll show me what it is He wants me to do. I now need more prayers about praying more, reading my Bible more, and to never give up and to trust in Him. Thank you all!

[steenajack]

I'll be praying for you AnimeGirl! And I'm so glad you're feeling better.
You know, just an idea I'm throwing out there, have you tried looking for Art colleges in your state?
IDK if this helps, but I found this on the web: http://www.cca.edu/

Again, I'll be praying for you!

[Beau Soir]

(to your most recent post)
That's the spirit! God will take care of you, no matter what. Great news, keep it up!
Also, much kudos to you for drawing manga... it's really hard! I want to since I have so many stories, but I always get too intimidated by it. ^__^;;

I'm in a quite similar situation to you, I am an artist as well, except I just graduated this year. But I haven't and am not going to college just yet because I plan to go to art college. I'm confident that it was His will for me to not go this year, because of toooo many reasons to explain... But, because I waited, I found out about another way better art college, one that knocks the socks off the one I looked at myself and suits me better. And guess what- I looked at the latest Spring Art Show online, and there was MANGA. Seriously! The other college was against letting me draw anime style, but I waited and this just showed up! I wasn't even out searching, amazing how God works...

And, you know, it's only a cultural view that you have to go to college as soon as you graduate. Don't feel pressured about it, but keep hearing out what God says. I myself was iffy about waiting, but it's not my timing, it's His. I had to give it to Him, even when my friends were saying on Facebook about how awesome college is and they were posting so many new cool-looking pictures. His voice is the most important, not the world's...

But what I really wanted to say is, you're not alone in this :3 and I also wanted to recommend this college to you, if you want to check it out. They have online degrees if you live far away, and in Illustration they have Sequential Art, Comic Book Art, Character Drawing, and Cartooning as some of the classes. You can even try a demo of what an online class would be like. They're one of the best illustration schools in the nation, and they don't require a portfolio for admission. If you're interested at all, by all means, please.

Academy of Art University - Illustration
AoAU's latest Spring Show

In whatever happens, if it's what God intends for you to do, He will make a way! I'll pray for you!

[Mr. Rogers]

In the art world, it is probably your portfolio and your previous artist work that make the big difference. I would spend a lot of time learning good story-telling and writing, as well as art.

[Etoh*the*Greato]

I went through six years of college and came away with a degree that I had entered into thinking God had destined me to be in that particular field when, when I got out of college, did not turn out to be the case... Maybe I'll use that degree professionally later or maybe not. Either way, I came away with much life experience. College is for finding what you want to do with your life and acquiring the skills to do such. If you don't know soon you will. God will guide you and he WILL take into account your talents and desires.

I've only rarely met someone who knew what they wanted going into college and came out with that degree and went straight to it. Have some faith and just simply be excited for the future. You're enting into what is, I feel, the coolest part of one's young life. As much as you've grown and learned as a child, what happens to you with the next six or seven years of your life will shape you as a person in ways far more profound than almost anything you experienced before. It's frightening but somehow so very exciting. I won't lie, I'm a tad envious. I wish I could do it all again. Haha.

[AnimeGirl]

Thank you all for the responses ^.^

@Steena and Beau: Cool, thanks for the links!!!