My boyfriend's mom is trying to convince him to do bad things...

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My boyfriend's mom is trying to convince him to do bad things...

Postby animechica » Wed Apr 22, 2009 9:23 pm

I just wondered what you guys would think of a situation like this.
My parents have always been pretty strict about following the law so I have no understanding of it.

It's pretty common around where I live to have underage smokers and drinkers, and there's a lot of pot smoking too. I don't mess with stuff if I can help it since I think it's morally right to try and follow the law. My boyfriend is now of the age where he can buy cigarettes and alcohol. He doesn't use either, but I just found out recently that his mom will ask him to run to the store to buy cigarettes for his brother's underage girlfriend.

He was surprised when I told him you can get arrested for buying cigs for minors, but said "It's been implied that I could get kicked out of the house if I don't run that errand." Sometimes, I feel like without him, a lot of things around his house wouldn't get done because his mom seems to be the only other person willing to do most things. So people ask him to do random things a lot and I guess buying cigarettes for a minor is one of them.

The first time I found out, he had already promised to get them, so he did. Then we talked about it and I was upset and said I wished he wouldn't do illegal things (especially things he doesn't even really want to do in the first place) and he said he didn't like it either, and he promised he would never do it again.

So his mom's been sick and today she calls him at my house and is like "Can you get her cigarettes?" and he's like "No." and she's like "Please, do it for me" and stuff like that and he's just like "No, can't do that." Then I guess while I was busy she called AGAIN and was like "You're old enough to know she's going to get them anyway!"

What would you guys do in that situation?
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Postby Ante Bellum » Thu Apr 23, 2009 4:36 pm

He seems to be keeping to his promise.
I would try to report the activity, but I think because of your boyfriend's history of buying he might get in trouble as well. I'm not sure if not knowing the law would stand up at all.
One day, I'm sure, something will come to light. I wish I could be of more help, but I also do not know what I would do in such a situation. I pray that there will be a solution to this.
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Postby animechica » Thu Apr 23, 2009 8:19 pm

Ante Bellum (post: 1306705) wrote:He seems to be keeping to his promise.
I would try to report the activity, but I think because of your boyfriend's history of buying he might get in trouble as well. I'm not sure if not knowing the law would stand up at all.
One day, I'm sure, something will come to light. I wish I could be of more help, but I also do not know what I would do in such a situation. I pray that there will be a solution to this.


Yeah, the thing is, his mom also allows his brother to obtain and smoke pot (she even gives him the money because it helps him with his anxiety) which is not legal in this state right now. Sometimes she even "benefits" from it. I have gotten unwanted contact highs before just by being in the house so I would probably test positive on a drug test, which sucks.

The thing is, I really don't feel like ratting anyone out because these people for the most part have been extremely nice to me. I feel like it would be a betrayal, and we live in a small town, so I personally feel that if the cops were serious about it, they would find out easily enough. I just wish she would let my boyfriend keep his convictions and not pull this stupid peer pressure crap on him. She is a Christian as far as I know, so I really don't understand going so far as to pressure someone who *doesn't* want to break the law, into doing so...
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Postby Roz » Sat Apr 25, 2009 1:25 pm

Good for you for trying to do the right thing here. Hang in there.


Praying for wisdom for you.
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Postby Doubleshadow » Mon May 11, 2009 12:25 pm

How difficult. I wish there was something I could offer to resolve this, but when the parent is the problem it is difficult.
Honoring your parents means doing right by them, not be blindly obedient. He has to try to follow the law and convince his parents doing things that might get him arrested is something they shouldn't force him. I'll pray for him and his family.
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Postby KumaruRockz » Tue May 12, 2009 1:16 pm

Tell him not to do it. You two are right. Forget what his mom says.
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Postby Gala » Thu May 14, 2009 7:17 pm

I know pretty much how you feel... my fiance's mom keeps trying to get him to sell drugs since we're both broke and he owes her money.

Definitely keeping you in my prayers.
Always find time in your day to rejoice for something the Lord has done for you... even if it is just the miracle of getting up every morning.
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