a small praise and an uncertain future

[Danderson]

Hey Guys,
just wanted to let you know that, as of today, shooting of Project Eagle: Mission 1 (an amateur feature film I've been working on for 3 years now) is finally 100% COMPLETE!!!
We're still working on editing, but that's like 97% done (we're matching up footage from green screen shoots and working on sound mixing as well), and we're going to start major special FX work next month.

The goal is to get it done by Christmas... Please pray for me and my friend (who will only be known as Dr. Newton), that God would give us both the strength and motivation to finish this, but in good quality as opposed to rushing things...We're the only behind the scenes team on the project, and it is a very very large project at that....

There's also been some stuff of late that I've been struggling with regarding if I'm going to the Center for Creative Media this August...or at all...

Alot of it has to do with financial stuff and it is more then frustrating. Since it is more of an "internship" then an actual film school, there really aren't any specific scholarships or loans that they specifically offer to pay for tuition.

According to "them", many of the students have paid off most of their tuition through "fundraising," which has not sat well with my dad or me. So, besides needing to be creative, I'm probably going to be looking for another part-time job in January, which at best might only help pay for less then half of tuition (along with the part time job I already have)...

What's most annoying about all this is that I feel like I finally find a place where I can learn the skills for what I believe God has called me to do, in an environment that is more hands-on experience as opposed to classes (which in the world of film, looks better on a resume), with ppl who have that same mission and calling that I have....and now it just seems like it could all fade away....At this point, I really don't want to go anywhere else, as there's been no where else that has gotten me this excited about going into the field....yet, I'm not 100% sure that CCM is where God wants me.....and decisions have to be made soon....too soon...

So, I guess what I'm asking for is prayer...prayer that God would show me where he wants me to go, be it CCM, or another college or film school...prayer that wherever he wants me that he would provide me with the means to get there...prayer that through this time I would lean on His strength, instead of freaking out and resting on my emotions....that He would give me patience and understanding....that I would choose to follow Him, no matter my circumstances....

Thanks Guys...Have a great Thanksgiving....

[freerock1]

Praise God for this possible opportunity. Lifting you up that the Lord would have guide you and have His way in this decision.

And thanks for your faithfulness to lift up the needs here and post an encouraging word. I mainly lurk and don't post here that often, but your faithfulness doesn't go unnoticed. And if I'm noticing it, the Father is noticing it much more!

[Danderson]

Another update on the project. We are still halfway through effects work (of which there is way too much for two ppl to get done), so we are getting closer to finishing the movie....But the battle is growing darker. I've seen myself waste entire days that I could be working on the project by procrastinating on the internet. Yet, recently, I've been taking week-long internet fasts these past few months, and they really have helped me in my struggles between my distractions and my task.

Yet, as I get closer to accomplishing the task, the temptation to procrastinate grows even stronger...falling is easy for me, it's getting back up that becomes the problem....This time, however, I am about to attempt something so drastic it could possibly change the course of this war that rages within my heart (between the old nature and the new)

I am going to go cold turkey on all internet use from here until my task is complete (which could be late April at this rate), as doing so seems to give me massive amounts of strength over my old nature, giving another weapon to my new nature and to Christ....

Please pray again for my friend and myself as we both have this tendancy I listed abouve, to procrastinate massively. That God will give us the strength, the determination, the motivation and the will power to complete this task; to face and deny ourselves and our wants daily....
Thank you friends....

Also, update on future plans. Over January, turns out that God want's me to stay around and go to a local community college that has the same stuff I need to go where I need to go (even though it's not a film school), which is a media arts and science BA.

[Popsicle]

Praying for you guys!

[RandomBurrito]

That's wonderful that you're doing this project for God! Procrastination can be an ugly thing..... I know. Well, I pray that you two's hard work will pay off and that God will bless you two as well! God bless!

[Danderson]

HEy everyone...Quick update...Finally have set a date for a premiere for the friends and family involved in this and it'll be in less then 3 weeks. Production is still coming along, but these last few months I've struggled with focus.....I see it as the devil doesn't want me to finish this, knowing that he'll lose once this is done, so He'll throw every distraction in my way...

But God is getting me through....It's odd, but my heart has seem to grown somewhat emotionless this past month....what I mean by that is I don't waste time after being distracted by throwing an emotional pity party...I just get back up and back to where I started....God knows I'm an emotional person, so maybe he's trying to take that part of me that kills myself for getting distracted away......But is this really helping?

One thing I feel like I lack right now is passion...But it is something I really need these next 3 weeks.....Is passion a feeling or a choice? or both?

Thanks for praying guys....Keep praying for myself and my friends as I know we are still far from out of the woods....

(And if anyone noticed, I've been lurking around CAA off and on since announcing my cold turkey internet sting....as u can see it didn't work....So, I've decided, "Might as well just come out of the shadows and be part of the community again")

[Ante Bellum]

I think that passion is both...you can feel it when you have it, even if you don't always feel it, and it's a sort of choice whether or not you have enough passion to feel it. (I am making no sense here, am I? Sorry, I am not quite sure how to word it.)

Once you are done with your movie (Keep on pushing forward, your goal is not out of reach!), I am sure that your passion for movie-making will return; when you look back and say, This is what I've accomplished.

Praying for you!

[RandomBurrito]

HEy everyone...Quick update...Finally have set a date for a premiere for the friends and family involved in this and it'll be in less then 3 weeks. Production is still coming along, but these last few months I've struggled with focus.....I see it as the devil doesn't want me to finish this, knowing that he'll lose once this is done, so He'll throw every distraction in my way...

But God is getting me through....It's odd, but my heart has seem to grown somewhat emotionless this past month....what I mean by that is I don't waste time after being distracted by throwing an emotional pity party...I just get back up and back to where I started....God knows I'm an emotional person, so maybe he's trying to take that part of me that kills myself for getting distracted away......But is this really helping?

One thing I feel like I lack right now is passion...But it is something I really need these next 3 weeks.....Is passion a feeling or a choice? or both?

Thanks for praying guys....Keep praying for myself and my friends as I know we are still far from out of the woods....

(And if anyone noticed, I've been lurking around CAA off and on since announcing my cold turkey internet sting....as u can see it didn't work....So, I've decided, "Might as well just come out of the shadows and be part of the community again")

I prayed for you ^_^ I hope it all goes well! Update us when you can, God bless you!!!

[Danderson]

guys...i just left a dent in my bedroom hallway a couple hours ago....and I don't do that sort of thing....

It really, really scared me....slowly getting over it....letting go of this stress....even screamed at the devil out loud, inside my closet (since I still feel hindered and modest enough not scream with all the neighbors outside.....

THe sad thing is, everything is where it needs to be movie wise, familly's getting along, I have a home, two good part time jobs, friends, nobody who's in trouble or has died...I have no "logical" reason to be like this....and usually, when I'm not in a good mood I can usually hide it well, with little difficulty....

But it's like I just became something I'm not...a monster...that's what I feel like.....I could barely drive my little sister to her soccer practice. I think most of it is stress, a heart that's been hardening it's communication with God, and person who's had to feel being numb for months with highs everyonce in a while...

...I think the devil knows I'm almost done with this project....it's hindered me from other things, kept me stuck in a place where he can use me, but, once it's done, he know's that it has the possibility to plant a seed in someones heart towards finding God (even thought there's no gospel presentation).....He doesn't want me to succeed and will try anything to get me distracted.....

Please pray....I've talked to the parents....it really scared them...and it's scaring me...pray that God will guide me through....even when I can't feel Him.....I know this will all turn out for good....it's just a matter of getting there.....

[RandomBurrito]

Danderson, I know how you feel.

I've been having some trouble lately as well .. and even when things go smoothly I still feel like somethings been crashing down on me. I hate getting angry, and the bad thing about it is that when I do get angry I almost hate myself afterwards, which is wrong.

I do trust God, I know it'll get better; but like you said it's a matter of getting there.

The devil will throw what weakens us the most, but we need to fight back.

I'll pray for you, I hope all goes well. God bless!

[Danderson]

Thank you....God's given me alot of peace since then...looking back it's almost surreal that all that happened....

But anywhoo, here's what's happening right now....This week I'm finally finishing this massive project (in fact having a premiere for the movie at my church this Friday), but there's still alot to acomplish before then and a lot that could easily go wrong....please pray for wisdom, peace, and patience (and I guess guidance) if the situation get's dicey with tech stuff, for both my post-production crew and myself....thank you....

With that, I will be taking a break from the internet until after Friday.....

[RandomBurrito]

Faithfully I'm going to say it's going to go well! In Jesus name! His name is very powerful.

I'm glad things are better. Lately I feel better as well, thank God!
Let us know how it goes! It must be exciting to have this premier. I'm hoping to make some short films later on, right now I had some comedy things. But I did want to make videos to songs from Christian bands as well.

God bless!

[Danderson]

Well, it's finally done and (after staying up till 5 in the morning to finish it) we showed it and it was AWESOME!!! They loved it and just about everyone says it broke every expectation they had about it (though I'm sure alot of it had to do with the fact that knowing the people involved helps).....

I feel like a great weight has been lifted off my shoulders.....Which I'm guessing is the final piece of His promise....

Thank you for your prayers guys....you have no idea how much they were needed....

Hopefully you guys will get a chance to see it sometime soon for the internet release....

[quote="Ante Bellum (post: 1313404)
Once you are done with your movie (Keep on pushing forward, your goal is not out of reach!), I am sure that your passion for movie-making will return"]
You were right....it has returned and I do feel like I can look back and say that it was worth it....

[RandomBurrito]

That's awesome!

Glad that all worked out! I can imagine the stress that probably went on during the whole process.

God bless you, tell God your hearts desires!