General Lust Prayer Thread (WARNING: Mature Content)

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Postby Kunoichi » Wed Jan 02, 2008 5:52 pm

Well praise report!!!!

I was alone with my boss yesterday and I didn't fall into the temptation and not only that! I made the decision to stay with my boyfriend for the rest of my life regardless of what will happen. When I tell him the truth, if he decides to leave me , well I will accept that.

This may seem like a small praise but it is huge for me!!!

So this is day two and I have not fallen either. I'm going for a full year. Pray God keeps me strengthened!
I am on the forefront of battle against the demons of earth. All Praise and Glory be given to God Forever and Ever!


:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
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Postby kat-su-chan » Wed Jan 02, 2008 5:58 pm

Good job kunoichi :D
but maybe you should get a new job? XD
Psalm 139
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
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Postby Okami » Thu Jan 03, 2008 6:35 am

Somehow I made it through the night. Day 4.

My cat was sleeping with me and squirming and rolling all over the place--I swear, he's just like a child--and it came to the point where he was seriously tempting me, and I knew if I went to go grab him, that wouldn't be the only thing I'd do. So I forced myself to keep my hands above my belly button until I fell alseep.
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Postby Kunoichi » Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:07 am

It isn't just a job...I wish it was that easy. If it was then I would.

I have been in this industry for over eight years. This job, I'm a martial arts instructor, is my passion and a big big big part of my life. This is the only place that I can use this specific style. Otherwise I would have to move out of my current state, as in state where I live, and find a better dojo, learn the style, see if they would hire etc. Meanwhile I'm cutting off all my contacts here. So no, quitting is not an option.

However, I am making more of a focus onto my boyfriend and God. That is a good thing. I fell in terms of M last night but am clean on the other stuff. I'm hoping to fight both. Day 3 for me.
I am on the forefront of battle against the demons of earth. All Praise and Glory be given to God Forever and Ever!


:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
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Postby kat-su-chan » Thu Jan 03, 2008 8:03 am

<mod snipped>

Hahah dang cat! Good job XD
Psalm 139
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
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Postby Blitzkrieg1701 » Thu Jan 03, 2008 8:57 am

Well, I'm back home now. Having a change of scenery for a week was really good, but I have to confess it's already feeling kind of oppressive being back in the same old surroundings. I've been praying a LOT over the lust struggles among other things, and it's been really good, but it's easier to stay positive about things when you're somewhere new, ya know?

Father God, thank You for giving us this desire to honor You with our lives. We know that it is only by Your grace that we could even WANT to dedicate our thoughts and actions to Your will instead of our own, let alone actually DO it. It's so difficult trying to keep our desires in check, Lord, trying to break away from deeply set habits. We know that we have no power to do it beyond what You do through us, Lord, but we also know that continuing to live just as we did before and expecting You to swoop in and change just what we don't like is not true obedience. Please, Lord, feed our faith. Deepen our trust. Give us a desire for you that will drive everything else we know.
In the name of Jesus Christ we pray,
Amen
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[font="Book Antiqua"][color="Purple"]For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this: that one died for all, therefore all died; and he that died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf. II Corinthians 5:14-15[/color][/font]
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Postby Aleolus » Thu Jan 03, 2008 10:59 am

<mod snipped>


wow, I know the feeling somewhat, but the cat that sleeps with me is more concerned with getting me to pet her rather than getting comfortable. So it's less of an issue, but still there.
"Please stand down, I don't want meaningless bloodshed!" chaos-Xenosaga

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Postby Okami » Thu Jan 03, 2008 11:11 am

kat-su-chan (post: 1188795) wrote:Hahah dang cat! Good job XD


Sadly, Satan's used him against me many a time. It could almost be called zoophilous, and it's one of my greatest shames, so I won't go there. This has actually been the first time I've resisted that temptation and come out victorious, so thanks :)
To quote myself,
[quote="Okami (post: 1187840)"]*sighs* So I fell again last night...and I did it in such a way, well, it's very shaming. Emphasis on very. The last time I'd M'd like that was back in July, the day before going to Christ in Youth, actually. But thinking about it in that light, it gives me hope. Why? Because of the resolution I made, to get clean from this...
And that time that I'd M'd in this way back in July...it had been my last for 4 and a half months.

Pray that I can go on stronger this time. If I can make it to at least 5 months, that will bring me out to June or so. Pastor Randy said to make God-sized goals for the New Year. Let's see what He can do! ]

It's one of my darkest kept sins. And that's what makes this so hard to type, as I've never confessed it to anyone, really....*sighs* I'm doubting whether or not to even submit this reply. It's just with him laying right next to me, peacefully asleep, he seems like the average housecat....
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Postby HiddenWoodchuck » Thu Jan 03, 2008 4:05 pm

Blitzkrieg1701 (post: 1188805) wrote:Well, I'm back home now. Having a change of scenery for a week was really good, but I have to confess it's already feeling kind of oppressive being back in the same old surroundings. I've been praying a LOT over the lust struggles among other things, and it's been really good, but it's easier to stay positive about things when you're somewhere new, ya know?


Eh, I sure know what you mean... I like home, but I always feel really good being away... granted, I am at work more than I am at home, it, like you said, is easier to keep away from things like lust, depression and stress when I am away.... guess that means I like to travel? I love driving... it's so weird, because I don't have many problems with thinking bad thoughts or getting anxiety when I am driving, so I tend to take very long drives, just to get away when I am off work... I use it to talk with God and just relax...

It's awesome to hear you are on day 4 Okami! Congrats! :thumb:

Kunoichi - Really happy to hear you have found out what it is you want to do. That is great! Praise God!

Still praying for you all!
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Postby Sheenar » Thu Jan 03, 2008 5:50 pm

Okami,
Have you tried just keeping the cat out of your room at night? That way he won't be there to provoke temptation...
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

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Postby TriezGamer » Thu Jan 03, 2008 6:52 pm

That's not so easy in some houses -- or with some cats. But it might help.
Embraced by a gentle breeze, my heart breaks as I think of you.
All alone at the top of the hill, I watch as the seasons go by.
--
Wishing for courage softly, I pray.
There's no going back now, to those tender days when you held me in your arms.

MOES "I can has Sane Sig now?"
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Postby Okami » Thu Jan 03, 2008 6:57 pm

Yes. And he's a sneaky bugga', knows how to get in. Though it helps when I'm at my moms, away from the cats....
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Postby Kunoichi » Fri Jan 04, 2008 6:07 am

I fell in M but I did not fall into the other tempation. And actually, God is helping cuz my boss got another job working at night, so it eliminates alot of the alone time I had with him before ^_^

I realized that my M is more of a habit than anything else at this point. Just have to break it so day 1 for M, day 4 for the Other.
I am on the forefront of battle against the demons of earth. All Praise and Glory be given to God Forever and Ever!


:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
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Postby Aleolus » Fri Jan 04, 2008 8:58 am

Ganbate, Kunoichi! And hearing about your boss is great news, God works wonders when and how we least expect them! :thumb:
"Please stand down, I don't want meaningless bloodshed!" chaos-Xenosaga

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Postby Blitzkrieg1701 » Fri Jan 04, 2008 1:08 pm

Ugh, I'm back one for one day and already I fall flat on my face. It's like... it doesn't even matter if I WANT to do any of this stuff or not anymore (cos I don't), it's just the way I've always done things, so it won't stop now. I dunno, the way my brain's wired, it's REALLY hard for me to let go of old paterns, no matter how destructive they are. PLEASE keep praying for me, guys. I really need it right now...
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[font="Book Antiqua"][color="Purple"]For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this: that one died for all, therefore all died; and he that died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf. II Corinthians 5:14-15[/color][/font]
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Postby Okami » Fri Jan 04, 2008 2:30 pm

Praise the Lord, Kun ^_^ Great news!


As for me, I almost fell last night. I came close...I was sleeping with another one of my cats and she decided to curl up right between my legs (Warm, but GAH)
I stayed up past midnight reading and did so until I was too exhausted to move. Thus, avoiding downfall. Heh. My friends told me to get a hobby, and thus, I did. Only bringing back an old one, and limiting it to Chrisian books. Nonfiction, preferably XD And nontriggering.
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Postby HiddenWoodchuck » Fri Jan 04, 2008 3:54 pm

Blitzkrieg1701 (post: 1189162) wrote:Ugh, I'm back one for one day and already I fall flat on my face. It's like... it doesn't even matter if I WANT to do any of this stuff or not anymore (cos I don't), it's just the way I've always done things, so it won't stop now. I dunno, the way my brain's wired, it's REALLY hard for me to let go of old paterns, no matter how destructive they are. PLEASE keep praying for me, guys. I really need it right now...


I know what you mean man... I will be praying for you. I've stopped myself many a times and said... what am I doing? Like, it wasn't something that tempted me, but more so, like it was just a habit, for stress or for no reason at all... it's really upsetting when you catch yourself doing that.
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Postby Kunoichi » Fri Jan 04, 2008 5:01 pm

I understand completely blitz. It is the same for me...more a habit and a pattern to fall asleep, *For me at least ><;
I am on the forefront of battle against the demons of earth. All Praise and Glory be given to God Forever and Ever!


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Postby Okami » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:11 am

[SIZE="1"]I'm so far away
From the only place I know I should be
so find me
and take me

Come like the day, come chase away this darkness
I've been living here so long and I give up
Come wash away everything I've built between us
And I will sing unending songs of Your love

I cannot find rest
I can't catch my breath from running away
So stop me, and take me

Come like the day, come chase away this darkness
I've been living here so long and I give up
Come wash away everything I've built between us
And I will sing unending songs

Your love has stolen my heart, *and* Your love has set me apart
Your love is life in my veins and all my mistakes fade away
So find me and stop me, and take me, and save me

Come like the day, come chase away this darkness
I've been living here so long and I give up
Come wash away everything I've built between us
And I will sing unending songs of Your love (Your love)
it's Your love
[/SIZE]



Day 0.
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Postby Htom Sirveaux » Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:17 am

Blitzkrieg1701 (post: 1189162) wrote:Ugh, I'm back one for one day and already I fall flat on my face. It's like... it doesn't even matter if I WANT to do any of this stuff or not anymore (cos I don't), it's just the way I've always done things, so it won't stop now. I dunno, the way my brain's wired, it's REALLY hard for me to let go of old paterns, no matter how destructive they are. PLEASE keep praying for me, guys. I really need it right now...


Yeah... one of the things that sometimes makes me doubt God (especially in times like that) is the question of why would He create in us the capacity for addiction? I simply can't think of a reasonable explanation for that...
God?...
How 'bout it?...
Hello?...
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Postby Aleolus » Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:01 am

<mod snipped>


Be strong, Okami! You know the old proverb, fall down seven times, get up eight! Never give up, keep putting faith and trust in God, and take every opportunity to escape he gives you!

Out of curiosity, are you a guy or girl? You're previous posts haven't made it completely clear to me. You talk sorta like a guy, yet you seem to be being tripped up by stuff that would hold stronger sway for women. I might be mistaken, but I'm just wondering.
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Postby Kunoichi » Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:03 pm

Okay well i'm day 2 for M and day 4 or was it 5 for the other.

I need some prayer actually. I told my boyfriend about not wanting M anymore, and though he doesn't completely understand it in terms of , he isn't in complete agreement that it is sinful, yet he supports me completely. I also told him I did not want to have sex anymore. Whether that means til we are married or not, well I don't even know but I feel like that is what God wants me to do.

Please pray that our relationship will grow stronger through this process and that I will stay strong in my committments.
I am on the forefront of battle against the demons of earth. All Praise and Glory be given to God Forever and Ever!


:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
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Postby Danderson » Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:47 pm

SpoonyBard (post: 1189382) wrote:Yeah... one of the things that sometimes makes me doubt God (especially in times like that) is the question of why would He create in us the capacity for addiction? I simply can't think of a reasonable explanation for that...
God?...
How 'bout it?...
Hello?...

Addiction to lust is actually our Enemy twisting something that was ment to be beautiful into something completly different...

Still praying....The Battles not over yet....keep strong....
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Postby Blitzkrieg1701 » Sat Jan 05, 2008 1:20 pm

Well, I guess it's comforting to know I'm not just going crazy (or at least not alone)

I'm still praying for everyone, of course. I'm glad that your boyfriend is supporting you, Kunoichi!

SpoonyBard (post: 1189382) wrote:Yeah... one of the things that sometimes makes me doubt God (especially in times like that) is the question of why would He create in us the capacity for addiction? I simply can't think of a reasonable explanation for that...
God?...
How 'bout it?...
Hello?...


I realize that I, of all people, am not exactly the best suited to discuss the ins and outs of addiction and how it relates to God, but there is something I'd like to suggest. I don't think our capacity to form habits or hold onto familiar things is bad in itself (anymore than human sexuality is bad the way it's designed, just like Danderson said). It's normal human behavior, the way we learn things and form emotional attachments to what's around us. If we just wouldn't introduce things we shouldn't into our heads (or if other people wouldn't), then they wouldn't be able to overstay their welcome by latching onto those traits and subverting them for other purposes.

As for why God would make us in a way that could be warped like that... well, I guess it's the same reason He would make us capable of choosing to sin in the first place. Wow, now THAT'S a big can of worms right there...
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Postby Okami » Sat Jan 05, 2008 1:55 pm

Aleolus (post: 1189393) wrote:Be strong, Okami! You know the old proverb, fall down seven times, get up eight! Never give up, keep putting faith and trust in God, and take every opportunity to escape he gives you!

Out of curiosity, are you a guy or girl? You're previous posts haven't made it completely clear to me. You talk sorta like a guy, yet you seem to be being tripped up by stuff that would hold stronger sway for women. I might be mistaken, but I'm just wondering.



*laughs* I'm a girl.
*pokes at the female sign next to her name*
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Postby SnEptUne » Sat Jan 05, 2008 5:23 pm

Most of the accomplishments are the results addictions and persistence. Will a violinist still the best if he or she only plays it every once in a while? Unlikely.

Like Blitzkrieg1701 had mentioned, addiction by itself isn't bad, just like physical desire such as hunger. However, if we let habit took over our life, or when we let desire control us (such as steal bread because of hunger), it will become problematic and potentially sinful.

I admit that I do "M" like every month or so, I would try to do without if it is possible. Although bible hasn't mention any fault for doing "M", I believe it is a great trial to prove the power of ones' will. Lust on the other hand is different and sinful depending on the definition, but I found that even easier to get rid of by meditation.

Just an advise, if "M" is becoming a problem, try to reduce consumption of meat, fats, and diary product. At least it works for me.
[SIZE="1"]Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)[/SIZE]
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Postby HiddenWoodchuck » Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:17 pm

Failure... failure.... failure. I lasted 3 days, and again, my habitual sin is back... very bad. I feel so out of control. I have so much other crap going on as well, but this was the last thing that really set me off, upset with myself... it was like everything just caved in at once. My friends, who I can talk to in person are gone back to college... I was the only one who opted for the online college thing... since I can work full time and do that.... so, alone again. I really hate my life, it is so predictable... good things happen, then all heck breaks lose and I fall flat on my face... seems like no matter how hard I try to avoid it... it happens. I dunno when I will be back to the forum, but I just wanted to say I will pray for all of you... I have to figure things out. Take care.
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Postby Sheenar » Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:26 pm

"7To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
2 Corinthians 12:7-10

God's grace is sufficient for us. We don't need to do anything to earn it and it is still there for us when we fall. Therefore we can get up again and keep walking because God's grace through Christ's blood is what keeps us going and is all we need.
I've found more and more as time passes just how great God's grace is and how little I deserve it. It amazes me how many times God forgives...
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

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Postby Aleolus » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:59 am

Okami (post: 1189433) wrote:*laughs* I'm a girl.
*pokes at the female sign next to her name*


For some reason, it's not showing up for me. Only reason why I ask.

Hiddenwoodchuck, you've been doing better than me! Sometimes, I wonder if I'm even really trying, seeing as I have trouble going one day!

Of course, I do know that I'm doing other stuff I shouldn't, like recently I signed up for an adult forum, and have been trying to find people on there to chat with. :red: I don't know why I can't stop, sometimes I doubt about whether I want to.
"Please stand down, I don't want meaningless bloodshed!" chaos-Xenosaga

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"Who are you?"
"If I knew that, I wouldn't be suffering." - Hakuro, Utawarerumono

"Dirty thoughts are bad!" Mahoro, Mahoromatic

Help my dragons to grow, please!
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Postby Okami » Sun Jan 06, 2008 12:03 pm

Ah, still day 0 for me...but that wasn't what I came to post.
~
I just finished a report for my Literature class on the origin of my name and the issue of purity, and I thought you guys might like to read it. So if you want to, shoot me a PM with your email address (Even if you know I have it, just to make things easier) and I'll send along a copy of it ^^
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