Felix's Writing

Unleash your creative writing skills here.

Postby Felix » Tue Feb 13, 2007 6:45 am

Thanks, Soph! ^_^ :hug: It's great to see you again! And I love your new avatar XD
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Tue Feb 13, 2007 4:24 pm

Good to see you again too! :hug: And thanks. ^_^ I'm glad you like it. :grin:
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Wed Feb 14, 2007 8:12 pm

My Last Resolve

These words refuse to fall apart,
They stain my lips and tear my heart..
I'm out to start a one-man coup,
While I'm just a pathetic few..
And once again I stand aside,
With wish and whim and alibi..
But soon enough I'll see the end,
For there's just one last soul to rend..
It's time to face my greatest fears,
And fly away on downy tears..
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Wed Feb 14, 2007 9:49 pm

I like that; and the title really goes with the whole striking feel: My Last Resolve. Gathering your inner strengths and standing against odds and pain. Very cool.
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Wed Feb 14, 2007 9:53 pm

Why thank you! ^_^ I always appreciate your feedback!
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Wed Feb 14, 2007 10:13 pm

You're very welcome, as I enjoy reading what you've written. Feedback is just a small give-back for the enjoyment I gain from reading your writing. ;)
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Fri Feb 16, 2007 10:23 pm

Well your feedback is always very much appreciated! ^_^

Okay, here's another one I just wrote this evening (I sorta stayed up too late writing it, actually ^^; ) The word 'quietus' doesn't quite fit evenly with the rhythm, but I thought it was such a neat word that I had to use, and you can sorta change the emphasis a bit to make it fit or something. I hope you like it!

-Stealing from an Eye-

May zephyrs ferry me so far,
To brush the tips of dusty stars;
To slip within a shadow's sigh;
And take the twinkle from an eye...

May final quietus interpose,
To shake the rhyming from the prose;
To face a door that will not pry;
And take the teardrops from an eye...

May faded cadence trill away,
To serenade a heart of clay;
To lead an army out to die;
And take the beauty from an eye...

May lonely letters slowly drown,
To turn a smile to a frown;
To cast a restless soul awry;
And take perception from an eye...
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Sat Feb 17, 2007 2:16 pm

Lovely imagery. ^_^ And yup, you can easily change the emphasis to make 'quietus' fit. Just put more stress on the 'pose' of 'interpose'. :grin:

Very cool. Not quite sure what concept or idea brought the poem forth, but it's very vivid, mysterious, and beautiful.
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Sat Feb 17, 2007 2:43 pm

Thanks! ^_^

Uh... well I couldn't tell you, because I don't really know myself ^^; I usually don't have a concept or idea, I just write down the words that are in my mind. I'm not sure if they reflect my emotions or what, but there isn't really any secret meaning or anything.

Again, thanks! ^^
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Sat Feb 17, 2007 3:39 pm

Ah, I see. Well it sounds cool. And deep, as well, even if you didn't have a particular idea in mind.

No problem! I'm happy to be able to read your works. ^_^
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Thu Mar 29, 2007 10:26 am

-Joy-

The blazing of your heart is
Familiar in course,
Breaching all defenses and
Piercing your remorse…

Melodic compositions of
Jubilance and glee,
Are dancing on a windowsill
Like raindrops in the sea…

Your feet have taken flight and
They won’t wait up for you,
So move to match the beat and
Watch out for your cue…

Now throw aside your troubles;
Don’t be fearful, don’t be coy,
Surrender to your laughter and
Experience true joy…
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Sat Mar 31, 2007 2:07 pm

I like it! It has a different sort of rhythm to it, but the difference is nice; a change from the usual rhythms etc I hear when I read poetry. The words you've used are cool too; a different idea of joy that I haven't really seen done in poetry. Then again, most of the poems out there that I've read are usually in the depressed vein. ^_^"
Very cool, Felix. ^^ Great writing.
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Sun Apr 01, 2007 3:08 pm

Thanks! ^_^ Yeah, I know what you mean, a lot of poems are dark and/or depressing, mine included I guess o.o; But happy and romantic poems are great, so I was going for a happy and joyful one. It's actually part of a project I'm working on with someone... we're doing the fruits of the spirit in photos and poems and stuff.
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Mon Apr 02, 2007 4:53 pm

Hey, that sounds cool. ^^ It sounds like a really cool way to get inspired by and connect your poems, photos, etc by a theme. ^^
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby insanewitapen » Tue May 01, 2007 4:36 pm

OH! One poem I don't think I've seen before! *agrees with everything photosoph said* XD this poem definitely makes me happy~ It is very romantic ^_^
[color="LemonChiffon"]Perfect World International
Llux-Sanctuary[/color]

[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
[color="LemonChiffon"]My DeviantArt[/color]
User avatar
insanewitapen
 
Posts: 167
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2004 7:08 am
Location: The Roleplaying Section

Postby Felix » Sun Jan 06, 2008 12:09 pm

Felix here. :D I'm back with a new poem, and about time too. I hope you like it! It's intended to be symbolic of our death and rebirth through Christ, so I hope that that is expressed. ^_^

-Dismantling me-

Oh, terrible Artisan
Puncture my wings,
Shatter my elegance
And undo my seams;
Rip out my heart
From its home in my chest,
And steal through the night
Like a thief, take my breath;
Render me useless
Expired and dead,
And pack me in boxes
With sawdust and lead;
But come back for me
When dark days are nigh,
And build me anew
From the ground to the sky;
Oh wonderful Artisan
Burn me with grace
And ferry me home
In your downy embrace
You are my father
And I am your son
If love is a game
Then you’ve already won.
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby GeneD » Tue Jan 15, 2008 4:41 am

I really love the images you used here, esp. the box and building up part.
V-E-R-Y cool.
I don't know what broke to make you like this, but I must be broken too if I'm standing here praising your destructiveness. -Rock (Black Lagoon)

As I had encountered kindness, I wanted to be kind myself. -Takashi Natsume (Natsume's Book of Friends)

MAL
Twitter
MOES: Promoting sane sigs.
User avatar
GeneD
 
Posts: 1969
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2007 10:43 am
Location: South.

Postby Felix » Tue Mar 11, 2008 8:46 pm

Thank you very much GeneD ^^ I'm glad you liked it.

I have a new poem. I hope you enjoy it!

[font="Century Gothic"]Monster[/font]

[font="Franklin Gothic Medium"]Oh, I am but a monster,
Just a creature and a creep;
I hide amid the shadows,
And the secrets of the deep;

My teeth are long and jagged,
And my fur is soaked with red;
I bite the hand that feeds me,
Yet expect to still be fed;

My home is with the darkness,
Where the world collides with hell;
I once was called a lion,
But I now am just a shell;

My mane has lost its splendor,
And my majesty has fled;
I crawl upon my belly,
With a heart cut out of lead;

Yet still you came to find me,
In my dark and dirty place;
You whispered to me softly,
As you stroked my ghastly face;

You held me tightly in your arms,
And thawed my icy soul;
You pulled me to my filthy feet,
And led me from that hole;

Now the daylight is my kingdom
And I run in fields of gold
With other lions just like me,
Through wonderments untold;

My crimes have been forgiven,
And my broken heart restored;
And with a roar I will proclaim,
That Jesus Christ is Lord.[/font]
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby GeneD » Sat Mar 15, 2008 9:57 am

Wow Felix! I liked how you build it up and the last lines are great. I think your poem really glorifies God, Felix. Well done!
I don't know what broke to make you like this, but I must be broken too if I'm standing here praising your destructiveness. -Rock (Black Lagoon)

As I had encountered kindness, I wanted to be kind myself. -Takashi Natsume (Natsume's Book of Friends)

MAL
Twitter
MOES: Promoting sane sigs.
User avatar
GeneD
 
Posts: 1969
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2007 10:43 am
Location: South.

Postby Felix » Tue Mar 18, 2008 1:05 pm

Thanks! ^__^ I appreciate it!
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Felix » Mon Mar 24, 2008 4:45 pm

Soon to Save me

Here I stand again
Lost forever on this fine line
Wading through a sea of lies
And poised to take my life
To my weary bleary eyes
The axe is undeniable;
Cold and oh so beautiful

Soon to take my life

There you stand again
Begging me
On bended knees you beckon me
Take my splintered cross and crawl
Upon my fractured feet
To run the ragged road and seek
The beauty of your face

Soon to save my life



Formatted Version:
Image
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Felix » Mon Apr 28, 2008 9:02 pm

Got a new one today. Been a bit of an ache on my heart lately. Hope you enjoy it. ^^

Good Men

She threw herself into the arms of another man
Now she’s a broken lover
What is wrong with that?
Her heart is cracked and scarred
And she can’t find the love she needs
She threw herself into the arms of a hundred men
Now she’s a teenage mother
What is wrong with that?
Her dignity is bruised and trampled
And in the dark her lonely heart bleeds
Oh, Girls of the world
Where is all the love you deserve?
Good men are hard to find
They’re low in supply but so high in demand
When can we make a change?
Right now.
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Tue Apr 29, 2008 5:52 pm

Really beautiful poetry; I've only glanced through, but I love what you've added. :) The ending of "Dismantling Me": 'If love is a game
Then you’ve already won.'
That's really cool. ^_^

Also Monster: I've been thinking about that sort of thing lately; a theme for stories I have in my head. We are like that -twisted and ugly from sin, and it's amazing how you've captured the way God comes to us in our ugliness, in the lines like 'As you stroked my ghastly face;' (man that was effective! ^_^).

Soon to Save Me
'To run the ragged road and seek
The beauty of your face

Soon to save my life'

Very beautiful. *Nods* The formatted version is excellent too -gives space in a really attractive way that works well to enhance the poem too.

Good Men

It's good, and it speaks a really good message -however I find that it ends very abruptly. It's good: 'Right Now', but just comes too soon, feeling out of balance. However the poem itself has some really excellent things to say. It's good. :)

Great poetry writing; sorry I haven't checked back here for a while. :)
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Thu May 01, 2008 7:09 am

^_^ Thanks Soph! I'm glad you had a chance to breeze through it. It's good to see you again!

Thank you thank you! ^^ I'm glad you like them

Yeah, I think you're right. Thanks for pointing that out. I'll have to go back and tweak it then! I was just struggling at the end to wrap it up and kinda cheated and did that ^^; I'll try to fix it ^^/

Again, thanks! I hope you're doing alright ^_^
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Felix » Thu Jul 31, 2008 10:37 am

Hey everyone. Felix here again. *grin* I have a new poem. Here goes, and I hope you like it!


Smile, Mortal, Panic.

It kisses like a quick disease
And clings to us like cobwebs in the eaves
It burns us from the marrow
In a raging conflagration
And tears us limb from sinew
In a gruesome celebration
Of our happy-sad mortality
Our perfect-plan reality
And in the end we only smile
Tucked safely in our sweet denial
Of all this mortal panic
And the bones locked in our attic
Oh, will we ever shed the scales
That cover up our eyes with lies
And will we ever shred the veils
That mask our cries with shallow sighs
For in the final biting end
There are no helping hands to lend
Like vultures we will eke our way
By thriving in our own decay
Soot and smog and burning towns
Are what remain of our renown
But by this song I will declare
That hope can flourish through despair
Just as a brave and tiny seed
Can grow to blossom in the weeds
So too will sprout a legacy
A solemn sort of prophecy
That given just a pinch of time
And maybe with a little rhyme
Will dawn the death of human guile
And then we’ll see these mortals smile.


P.S. Don't look for too deep of a meaning in this. Like a lot of my works, I just like to use powerful imagery and themes in my poetry but that doesn't necessarily mean that I have a clue what sort of message I'm trying to convey in my poems ^^;
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Sun Aug 03, 2008 3:47 pm

Wow, really excellent. :D (And sorry I haven't been back here for ages ^_^").
Hehe, really? You didn't have too deep a meaning in this? Hm... well I think it all really fits the title and explores different ideas on the theme. So it works well. ^_^

Anyway, you knows what's really cool? I have a timer going at the moment, and it ticks away the seconds. From that I can figure that your poem has EXCELLENT rhythm, if not perfect (often, and it's something I notice quite a bit in my own work, I stray slightly from the given tempo after a while, even if I come back to it. I might add a few more beats to a line with extra words or something etc). It was really neat reading it in time to the timer as well. :D

Very cool imagery; your first lines really caught me, especially with the 'cobwebs' as to me those remind me of old and dark things like cellars, which can be likened to death/mortality. The rest of the poem was great too, but the word 'cobwebs' stuck in my mind especially. That means you've got a great, attention-grabbing beginning that leads you on into reading and enjoying the rest of the poem. ^_^

It's great to read more. :)
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Fri Aug 08, 2008 2:59 pm

Hey Soph! It's good to see you! (Don't worry about it, I haven't been around much either ^^; )
Well, I guess there's some sort of meaning in it, but I mean when I'm writing it, I don't have a specific agenda, like "okay, this is what I want to convey in this poem." I just kinda start with a few words and an idea and then I just run with it and it isn't really until I'm done that I look back at my work and think about it. ^_^''' Kinda hard to explain.

Wow, that is cool! I guess I should try reading it with a timer because when I read it to myself the timing always gets a little off. I try my best to make most of my poems have very structured timing, but ya know sometimes it can give certain types of poems more impact if the timing is a little off. Makes them edgier I guess, hehe. But I'm glad the timing sounds good to you!

Thank you! You're right, the opening lines of a poem or story can be the main thing that hooks your audience into reading the rest of it. At the time I wasn't really thinking of that, but now I can see how it works. Thanks!

Thanks so much Soph. It's always a pleasure to get feedback from you, and it's good to see you! ^_^
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Photosoph » Sun Aug 17, 2008 5:29 pm

Well you're very welcome and it's cool to be able to talk to you again on this forum. ^_^

Love your avatar by the way. :D
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
User avatar
Photosoph
 
Posts: 1528
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2005 8:32 pm
Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.

Postby Felix » Tue Oct 14, 2008 9:09 pm

Got a new one guys! I hope you like it ^_^

The Cycle of Calamity

The furor of a frantic fight
Is built of shadow, like the night
And yet we howl at the sun
And kill our conscience just for fun
The few who fight are fit to fly
But all the rest will surely die
And when the reaper takes his due
The world of ghosts will wonder who
Has fallen through the cracks of time
And joined the endless rank and line
It’s us, my friends, the ones who swore
To end it here upon this shore
At last my dears, the end is near
But riding on a wave of tears
Is one who came to save the night
He wields a weapon made of light
A heart so cold, a rescue bold
A hero made from legends old
There is a hope for those of us
Who long ago collapsed to dust
A battle fought, a battle won
A haven wrought, a newborn sun
And in the peace that follows through
A brand new war will soon ensue
And so it will begin again
And on and on it never ends…
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Postby Felix » Tue Oct 21, 2008 6:48 pm

And another :] This one is meant to be more visual in nature, so hopefully you can see it while you read!

“Home again.”

Look into my eyes, my friend
As we set out for home again
And wave to those upon the shore
While memories become no more
Than dust upon the breezes past
That whistle through our sail-bound mast
So stick with me, we’re not alone
As once again we ride for home
The waves may come and wreck our boat
But side by side we’ll stay afloat
And stick it out until the storm
Has faded to a peaceful morn
And on the wings of dawn we’ll fly
Among the clouds and through the sky
Until we touch again the land
With fields of green and crystal sand
And welcomed by a trumpet blast
We’ll march into our home at last
And then I’ll take your hand, my friend
And say “well done, we’re home again.”
User avatar
Felix
 
Posts: 2098
Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 10:00 am
Location: Unemployed in Greenland

Previous Next

Return to Writing

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 153 guests