Suddenly depressed... again.

[Nightshade X]

There are a lot of people in my life who I'd rather not know about this part of me... that's why I wish to post this here. I want to be as transparent with this as I can be right now because I know that if I don't, I feel as thought I'll go crazy.

I'm feeling really down right now. Depression assails me once more. Honestly, I feel very useless... I don't know my worth because I feel as though I have none, though people say I do. It seems I'm always stuck in some transitionary period and I can't move on. I feel that life has flowed on without me... like I've aged but remained the same and I have no place in my own life right now. I feel like I've missed out on everything... absolutely everything there is to experience in my youth, all because of the mistakes I've made in the past... and now there's absolutely nothing left for me. I feel as though I'm in a state of living death without hope of awakening...

Please... pray for me.

[bigsleepj]

I know how bad sudden depression can be and I'll pray that you can work through it.

[CobaltAngel]

Definitely will do! I've been there bud, and I know how it feels to not want to tell those close to you in RL what you're going though. I've got some stuff like that going on wih me right now.

[Rogie]

While I understand your reasoning for not wanting some people to know about this outside of CAA, depression can be serious, and you should seek out some person in whom you trust. If you can think of a pastor, a teacher, a doctor, a friend, or, especially, a good Christian friend that you can trust, then you should share these feelings with that person and ask them for advice and help.

Otherwise, I'll be praying for you.

[K. Ayato]

Been through that, and through the Lord's help, I've overcome. I'll be praying. You can win against this.

[Tenshi no Ai]

I've been there as well, and will definately be praying for you through this all...

Also, here's some good verses that I wrote down in my "little yellow book". Everytime I find a good verse, I stick in in there and often use it to refer back to, and give out to people and of course, use for myself when I'm feeling down in the dumps. Hope these help out some^^

Isaiah 26:4
Trust in the Lord forever, for in God the Lord, we have an everlasting rock.

Isaiah 41:9-10
You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth, and called from its remotest parts and said to you, 'You are My servant, I have chosen you and not reject you. 'Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiouslu look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.'
(It's such a powerful verse everytime I read it... how God handpicks us and is always there to uphold us time and time again...)

Jeremiah 29:11
'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.'
(So even when we DO mess up, God still has SUCH amazing plans in the future for us to hope for^^)

Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
(Wow, a great verse that I just found now that I'll have to add to my book^^)

And of course, I'll have to add:
Psalm 139:13-14
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

[SP1]

When your life it passing you by, I find it is often accompanied by wishing for something in the future. That is, if you are constantly looking "forward" to the next movie release, the next weekend, the next semester...you mentally skip the time in between. It makes your life fly by. When we are children and don't care about such things, each day lasts for ages. As adults, with more focus on schedules, we miss a lot.

I will pray for you. I also recommend you get out of the house and go do something for someone else that 1) takes quite a bit of work, 2) is of a voluntary or service nature, and 3) keeps you connected with other Christians. Personally, I found that building a Habitat for Humanity house was quite cleansing. Working a food line, helping out a Church mission, etc., are also good. When you are doing these things, be very mindful of what you are doing right now, not looking forward to going home later. That is, say to yourself "this is exactly where God needs me right now, and I am content with that and blessed by this opportunity."

[Ryupower]

I will pray for you!
What makes you feel so useless? Dont listen to that ol' Devil's lies!

[Anna Mae]

Others have already given good advice, so I will simply add my prayers to the ones already being lifted.

[freerock1]

Lifting you up, my brother.

[agasfas]

I can understand and occasionally relate to ya... I'll keep you in my prayers buddy. Continue to look forward and things will get better.