making my own decision, Bible college, parents... :/

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making my own decision, Bible college, parents... :/

Postby Tenshi no Ai » Tue Oct 24, 2006 1:05 pm

I'll try and make this as short as possible...

Basically, for the past 3 years I've been wanting to go to one specific Bible college. My friend and I planned it out in high school and of ocurse I wasn't allowed to go and thought it wasn't a good diea, so she went and I was left behind at home here and basically forced into going to a community college last year and this. Honestly, I dont' feel like I'm moving forward at ALL just staying back here cuase my mom wants me to, and I'm really feel like I'm totally being called to go to the Bible college...

As of late, we've been in lots of arguements about me makign my own decisions (heck, I'm 19) and if I say what I want to do next year and so on, she gets made and arguements arise from it. She is not exactly a Christian. One of those people that say "yeah I believe in God" but that's about it. :/ Or using that phrase that annoys me "I'm Christian, but I don't practice it".

Basically here's my decision to go with my life: right now, doing some community college stuff, AND I'm working and it's too much for me doing both, and I feel like I've done every course I can here, and after this semister, that's it. Nothing mroe I feel I can do, or that interests me. So next semister I want to work the whoel time instead of doing school, to try and make up enough money as I can to go to Bible college next fall. And I want to take the inter-cultural program, because I know my interests/future will involve that sort of thing, and mayeb specialize in being an interpretor or counseller or somethign alogn the line. Of course, I won't knwo for sure until I go and take the program... and it's for an uncertain amoutn of years. Possibly go for a year and know EXACTLY what I'll be doign and do schooling for that or however things go...

As for my mom who REALLY doesn't understand, here's her concerns and views on it:

-health/family is THE most important thing in the world
-if I don't go to school next semister, or have Bible college be concidered "real school" by the government, no free medical
-she seems to believe I only want to go because my friends are
-she only wants me to go to a college with transferable course (so it "won't be a waste of money" if I change my mind and "get nothing out of it" :/)
-she seems to think I'm not balancing out my life and putting WAY too much on God and the Bible, and not on "making a living" for the future :/
-she makes it sound like church is a cult (concidering the above) ever since I started to go to youth, and made comments a couple times that made it seemed like it was "brainwashing" me :/
-she says God's important, but earning a living with money is JUST as important, and God wants me to have that too
-she says if I don't have a back up plan for all this, it won't happen and just be a waste of a large amount of money
-she says that there are lots of different interpretations to the Bible (I'm guessing thinkign that I'm going some way the Bible says, because of how I "interpreted" it or something?)
-she doesn't like me, someone who's legal adult age to make any "final decisions" liek I have that will effect my life :/ Oh no, I'm growing up...
-she's says the the best that she can do is meet "half way" and ONLY go to college there for 1 semister :/ But I want it for the year....
-she says that my auntie is backing her up with it on the whole academics and making a living thing (she says my auntie ina "non-practicing" Christian, and once again with that word, I know how thigns really are...)
-she tells me to "not listen to what other people suggest and be my your person" but when I do chose where I want to go/do, she thinks it's because others put me up to it and that it wasn't really MY decision
-she attempts to punish me by bringing other people into the picture who aren't even involved with this all (except wanting to support me with my decision makign, which she already has with my auntie etc), and then likes to bring up "I do this for you! I do that for you! And then you go off to say something like that?"
-she wants me to go to community college here for another semister "just so that I have 2 years on me", but not like that'll even get me anywhere with the path I want to take, and really doesn't get the REAL length of a 2-years degree...

To sum thigns up: she does not want to do be getting a straight Bible education :/ And like I mentioned above, I do want to take the program for at LEAST a year, and then see what thigns, interests, and doors are open for me then... But if I do decide to continue for 3 more years, she wont' want it.

So yeah, I don't even have to say why her ideals are :/ Arguement after arguement and I'm findign it VERY hard not to, or to obey "honour your parents" when she doesn't even understand my goals, in the least little bit... I hate feeling all "rebellious" because of somethign she doesn't approve of and support, because it's nice to have parents that will support you in whatever decision you make, but yeah my mind's made up :/

So if you can pray for all this that would be SO great... I know that as far as my decisions are concerned, I'm going. Because God's callings and authority is much bigger than hers... I just can't keep this up anymore though, if she won't listen to reason... And I know I can't keep living the life the way SHE wants it to be "for the best" :/ She says that "some parents wont' even let their kid make a decision when it comes to choice of colleges etc" and believes she is not one of them...
神 は、 その 独り 子 を お与え に なった ほど に 世 お愛 された。
独り 子 を 信じる 者 が 一人 も滅 ひない で, 永遠 の 命 お得る ため で ある。

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Postby Puguni » Tue Oct 24, 2006 1:42 pm

Being rebellious to be closer to God? I think that's a pretty noble endeavor.

Praying for you. May doors be opened to you.
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Postby Radical Dreamer » Tue Oct 24, 2006 2:35 pm

That sounds like a tough situation; I know I'd be really annoyed if I were in your shoes. I'll pray for you and her. :thumb:
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Postby Tenshi no Ai » Tue Oct 24, 2006 3:06 pm

Thanks for the prayers^^ Yeah it's tough and I know I shouldn't be arguing back, so I know I'm at fault there... just a hard situation overall to try and deal with :/
神 は、 その 独り 子 を お与え に なった ほど に 世 お愛 された。
独り 子 を 信じる 者 が 一人 も滅 ひない で, 永遠 の 命 お得る ため で ある。

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Postby Artist4Jesus89 » Tue Oct 24, 2006 3:07 pm

Oh man i have had the same problem with my Dad and he isnt even my guardian sheesh i will pray God works things out for the best!!!
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Postby SP1 » Tue Oct 24, 2006 4:17 pm

Is the Bible college not accredited? Maybe find one that is, if you are willing to compromise on this. Since some of your desires lean toward interpretation (languages) this line of specialty might not be available just anywhere. A year or two of community college doesn't necessarily translate into a big bucks career, so I think your mother is a bit off target there.

Be careful taking off from school and working. Even if it is your intent to go to another school later, you might find that difficult, for a variety of reasons I won't go into here. Discuss this with the counselor at your college. She/He might be able to check on transferrable credits, scholarship or grant opportunities.
Praying that doors will open.
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Postby Tenshi no Ai » Tue Oct 24, 2006 5:54 pm

SP1 wrote:Is the Bible college not accredited? Maybe find one that is, if you are willing to compromise on this. Since some of your desires lean toward interpretation (languages) this line of specialty might not be available just anywhere.


She seems to think that if I take Bible academics they don't transfer anywhere :/ And that's what I really want to go for, at least for the first year. I want more knowledge and learn more on it and different ways of ministerign and so on. Just, basic first year stuff. There IS another Bible/secular university close to it though that she suggested, but I feel no need to go there (for several reasons):

-she wants me to go there to take "real" academics, which I don't really want to take in this first year
-it's UBER expensive. I know God can provide, but I really want to try and as best I can, be dependant and be able to pay most my way for it
-I'm not really looking forward to the secularness of it. Not like bad things don't happen in Bible colelges without all the secular stuff, but if I'm to dorm there, yeah... of course there's rules and stuff but yeah :/ Plus I stayed at the college I'm wanting to go to before and I really like the atmosphere of it there.

Yeah :/

Oh and about the working instead of school thing, I'm only looking into that, because I know that if I do go for it, I'll be pretty close to making enough for tuition for the year, and working only weekends won't quite be that close... Once again going alogn with the wanting to do things things on my own... And also I am VERY burnt out from trying to do both :/ Won't be able to last...


Just had a talk with my step dad now (as I sometimes do) and I'm glad he's being someone who's the ONLY one in my whole family really, that supports it... He was the one that helped bring me to church and stuff too. So at least there's somethign there^^
神 は、 その 独り 子 を お与え に なった ほど に 世 お愛 された。
独り 子 を 信じる 者 が 一人 も滅 ひない で, 永遠 の 命 お得る ため で ある。

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Postby SP1 » Wed Oct 25, 2006 3:27 pm

Bible Academics? OK, that sounds like more vocational training than college work, since for most 2-4 year colleges I know, you don't hardly start on specialized classes until 3rd year. Be that as it may, it's nice to hear that someone supports you. [Besides us in prayer, of course].

BTW, your mother does realize that you want to go into ministry and that ministers typically don't make much in the way of cash, right? I mean, if that's your chosen profession, the concept of monetary rewards is already off the table. Now if you wanted to go into some sort of counselling or teaching field that required credentials (that is, a degree), then a purely Bible-based academic background would be a problem. We just hired a new youth director at our church. The fact that she has a teaching degree and taught elementary school for a couple of years first has really helped her out.
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Postby Ryupower » Wed Oct 25, 2006 4:02 pm

I'm praying. God'll get the way He wants....
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