read only if you truly feel compelled to

[Jaltus-bot]

Hi, over the last year and a half, God has really been doing a lot in my life to take a way certain sins and really make me more of who He wants me to be. I wish that I could just pretend that I have always been as I am now, but that wouldn't be true. I hate to admit things that I have done routinely that were wrong. It's embaressing. I guess that is pride, but here is short version because this is something that I have to do to allow God to make me more who He wants me to be. I will feel better after this.

So around the time that I was in high school, I really got stuck in a very unchristian mind set. It was fun, or easy, or selfishly gratifying. It was no big deal, I didn't act that much on certain thoughts, I wasn't a bad person, God would forgive me. But it was a big deal and I realized that it became too much a habbit. God wants us to have the mind of Christ, not the world. He wants us to love Him and follow Him, not the things the world tells us. That was hard. I couldn't just change and I don't want to talk about that, so nothing changed that much. Especially over the last year and a half, God put some people in my life who really helped me to make God a bigger part of my life. The way that they lived and the things that we did together helped teach me how to put God higher in my life. He is really coming to replace a lot of that garbage inside of me. Through Him doing that, I am coming to have more desire to be who He wants me to be and really follow His leading.

[Angel37]

Praise God! You've come farther than I, I must admit. But thank you for sharing. It'll help me put my own problems into the limelight to deal with them. *hugs* Thanks.
-Angel

[teepanee]

Your testimony is somewhat similar to what happened to me as well. Yes, by God's grace and mercy, we are new creations in Him. He has given us salvation and faith. But we're in a constant spiritual battle. During high school I was unstable and there were times I'd like to say I was strong and close to God, but really, I wasn't and lived not much differently than a nonbeliever. However, I have grown quite a bit the past year, especially with the spiritual companions He has placed in my life.

That's so awesome that God brought you this far~! May you continue to guard your heart, not conform to this world, and persevere in your faithfulness to the One who created you.

^_^

[shooraijin]

I'm glad that God was able to not only point out ways for improvement, but give you the strength and wherewithal to correct upon them. I know we've all had periods in our lives like that -- I can't exactly say that my college days exactly honoured God myself, but I'm very happy He put people in my life to drag me back to the narrow way. I still have to fight to stay on it, of course, but I'm glad I am. Thank you for giving us some insight into your journey, too.

[ally-san]

yay! i like hearing stories like that. i'm glad for u.

[Yojimbo]

I know what it's like...two and a half years ago I fell out of grace with God. I started living a very bad lifestyle that I'm very ashamed of. At first I always tried to justify it to myself, then I stopped caring completely so much I never even mentioned God for nearly a year. Only six months ago I finally got out of it and I'm so very glad I did even though I gave up so many things and alot of people. It's comforting to hear other people went through the same thing.

[Syreth]

hey, thanks for sharing, shezerade. It's encouraging to me to hear testimonies like that. It is really hard to come out of the rut of worldly thinking and praise God that He brought you out of that! That's truly awesome.

[Anna Mae]

I know how you feel, shezerade. I'm pretty embarassed about my life from the age of accountability up to part way through middle school. I'm still unhappy with some things, but now GOD is the center of my life- and it's awesome!

[Jaltus-bot]

One of the things that I think I have most learned over the last two years is my humanity. By this I mean that I can't be even close to perfect. I can't be what I want to be without God. I really need to just turn to God. I am not the person I want to be without God. I hope I really stay with that kind of attitude and grow stronger in it rather than loosing my focus and trying to follow something else.

[Jaltus-bot]

All my life, I’ve lived in a Christian home. We went to church on Sunday, although not as regularly in junior high and high school after my mom got sick. We talked about God and stuff, but I never really consistently lived a live committed to seeking the Lord.

When I got into college, I wasn’t the student that I should have been, nor the person that I could have been. That rally broke down a lot of ideas or expectations that I had about myself. I was not who I who I thought that I would be because I relied on myself to make me that way. I was too much a fool to know what a fool I was. I think I am a bit more humbled from that now. I pray it lasts. I think that my first college was mainly a tool for that and teaching me a little more about what it means to be a Christian.

I missed the constancy of Godly focus that came from sharing a room with a girl who was a stronger Christian that I am and a better friend than I am\was. This is part of what got me reading the Bible more regularly this summer. I happened to flip to Kings 3 times in two days after asking God what to read. I decided to read 1st Kings. This summer is the first time in my life that I have read the Bible almost everyday for over a month (and ore than a couple of verses at a time). I am up to 2nd Kings chapter 20. I really like Kings because when I started reading 1st Kings some of the notes, the idolatrous kings who fell, and the godly ones who prospered got me thinking about what things in my own life I put ahead of God.

My best friend/roommate from last school year invited me to go to mountains with her and her family. This was good because it created a change in daily rhythm that kept me from getting bored with my daily life ad tiring from the recently being developed habit of reading a chapter or two of the Bible each day.

CAA has provided a way to connect with other people/Christians online during the week while most of my friends have gone off home for the summer and are not online as much. It has also caused my to open up more about deeper issues like college mistakes and ways that God is changing me. I think that it allows me to mentally separate who I was from who I am becoming. It has also given mea way to express certain things.

[Zane]

I accidently read "was mainly a tool" the first time around as you being a Tool (like idiot) but i got it now

Thats cool that you've been drawn back to God, and it is true that CAA is really a cool gift from God for Christians worldwide just to chill and chat about him in our own time, i agree with you there. Cheers for sharing that with us Sheherazade