CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

I consider myself a feral creature. Around guests who are my parents' friends, I'm super mannerly. When it's my besties and my family at the table, I can be a complete pig (I don't put my feet on the table nor chew with my mouth open). Are table manners always important or overrated?

I think table manners are pretty important giving the situation.
If you're eating pizza around a coffee table with friends I think things can be a little more lax. But if you are sitting down at a restaraunt or at the table, then I think is the time to try to remember what our parents taught us.

I have this habit of resting my forearm on the table while I eat. (not elbows) and slouching a little, especially if I'm eating soup so I don't spill anything XD. But That's not very good posture nor is it proper etiquette. I try not to talk with my mouth full of food, or smack my lips XD.

But I think manners can also be very intimidating, I was once told while ago I was eating something like a breakfast burrito (which is a pretty squishy food) that I swallow loudly? I'm not sure if that's something anyone can really avoid especially given the type of food being eaten. That comment has made me more self conscience of how I eat though... and I don't like eating in front of people I don't know. ^^;

I also believe that manners are cultural, and for some families these things may not matter or may even be considered rude to follow "Correct manners."

Honestly, they do not matter so much to me. However, I try to be civilized around guests and such.

At home, I rarely at the dinner table. I mostly just eat by myself except for like special occasions such as Thanksgiving, New Years, or the 4th of July. But at school, I have to eat in the cafeteria so I will sit with people there.

I don't care so much about elbows on the table and what not, but as long as everyone chews with their mouths closed, I'm good.

It's important, but not too important. Obviously (like everybody else has said), things like chewing with your mouth closed are important. But elbows on the table or things like that- meh.

Wait, elbows on the table is bad manners? Since when? I always eat like that, since I was a kid. How is that bad manners? People are weird.

I put my elbows on the table all the fricking time, partly because at restaurants the tables are sometimes really far away from the seats no matter what you do, and I'd rather lean over my plate slightly than drop food all over myself.

Yeah I put my elbows on the table all the time. I don't really see why it's such a table manner faux pas.

How about reaching across the table?

I usually ask for people to pass me stuff if I can't reach it.

aliveinHim (post: 1482313) wrote:How about reaching across the table?

Dangerous. Your clothes can get into the food (eeewwww! for all parties involved). Partially why it's considered rude.

The elbows thing comes from when there wasn't so much space at the table, and there just wasn't room for people to have their elbows up.

I live alone. That solves the table manners problem.

Atria35 (post: 1482316) wrote:
The elbows thing comes from when there wasn't so much space at the table, and there just wasn't room for people to have their elbows up.

So, we can kinda disregard this one unless we're eating at a very small table, right?

I've always viewed manners (at the table or elsewhere) more of a respect showing practice towards another person(s), rather than "This is how you should act all the time whenever you eat regardless of anything."
Therefore, you have to be aware of the others who are eating with you. Be considerate towards them. If you know they don't care about you putting your elbows on the table or even chewing with your mouth open, then who cares? You're in a casual setting with friends, you all can lighten up. And hey, if you're alone, you can do whatever the heck you want. XD;;
But if you are around company where that kind of behavior can be seen as obnoxious or rude (such as a family or business setting), it's best of avoid more casual manners. (i.e. If I go out to a nice dinner with someone, I will feel more respected and cared about if they take the time to have proper manners and not eat as they usually do in a more casual setting).

I dunno, though. I tend to be rather stingy when it comes to manners. XD;

I put my elbows on the table and take about the space of two persons, else I can barely eat. I also have tendacy to eat very fast and according to my mum it usually doesn't look that good either... I don't see why you would care about how it looks while your eating, just enjoy the food to the max!

*Edit*

I do however understand there are times when manners is important, but I was talking about eating in general XD

My family has an unwritten book of mild table manners that are usually followed and occasionally broken. M mom holds the keys to the book, and my dad takes liberties every so often. We're usually pretty good around guests though. Courtesy is important; letting your guests or siblings and fam take their share first. I believe God wants us to be courteous.

Manners matter. I always try to adhere to them.

Manners are pretty important in my family. I do think it's important to be polite both to company and family. In some ways I almost feel like I should treat my family better than I do guests because they are the most important people in my life, but often it doesn't work that way. I guess it's a difference between actual manners and respect...

I have the same manners at the table whether it be with guest or my family or friends. I am not like extremely strict with myself but I eat with my mouth shut, elbows not on table and use knife and fork I do all that, Also take small bites lol. It seems to me having good table manners is being caring to others around you, I don't know maybe thats just me.

ChristianKitsune (post: 1482253) wrote:I have this habit of resting my forearm on the table while I eat. (not elbows) and slouching a little, especially if I'm eating soup so I don't spill anything XD.

This.

I always hate it when someone at the table (my brother) belches out loud or chews with their mouth open. Table manners are very important to me, even if I don't have any friends over.

Manners are for the weak. I follow the Viking way of eating one's food like the Trolls of the north.

But I do try to follow some table manners.

Important.

Ettiquite by Dove

1) Manners matter, but people matter more.
2) Go with the flow and the occasion.
3) When in doubt which fork or spoon to use watch the host.
4) And for the love of God, please don't discuss disgusting things while other people are eating.
5) Ask and you shall receive.
6) Very few people are allergic to whatever dessert is being served.

SailorDove just made me think of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THYVh9AhtLk

I've never understood how elbows on the table is bad manners. Other than that one, I believe table manners are very imporant and just part of showing respect and being mature. I don't get all the fancy pancy table manners though, with about a gazillion things to remember (and most of them are ridiculous anyway!

Warrior 4 Jesus (post: 1482422) wrote:I've never understood how elbows on the table is bad manners. Other than that one, I believe table manners are very imporant and just part of showing respect and being mature. I don't get all the fancy pancy table manners though, with about a gazillion things to remember (and most of them are ridiculous anyway!

Like, the fork on the left? And the difference between a dinner fork and a dessert and salad fork? Nah, those aren't really fancy. Common knowledge, right?

And for the love of God, please don't discuss disgusting things while other people are eating.

This is of course tailored to the occasion. Since virtually everyone in my family is involved in the medical profession somehow, we end up having table conversations that would probably curdle people's blood in other houses.

I usually have to be careful about this elsewhere.

I hate it when people do that. I'm super squeamish and if I hear one gross thing at the table, there goes my appetite. It really helps when my little brother's friends are over.

I'm an Ag major, so around certain people, the usual dinner conversation is in the realm of palpating cows and other things. It doesn't bother me --I'm not grossed out by those kinds of things.

I am grossed out, however, about bugs. Talking about bugs in detail ("I saw the BIGGEST roach yesterday...") is not acceptable dinner conversation to me.

I sometimes have my elbows on the table, but for the most part I keep them off. Even when I'm eating alone at home or out somewhere I practice table manners since they were drilled into my parents from a very young age. I don't chew with my mouth open, napkin almost always goes onto my lap, I cut reasonable bite sizes out of my food, and I stick to the age-old tradition of things not to be discussed around the dinner table: religion, politics, and gastro-intestinal diseases.