Curtain Rods

Talk about anything in here.

Curtain Rods

Postby Azier the Swordsman » Fri Oct 29, 2004 2:26 pm

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes,
crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at
their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put
on some soft background music, and feasted on a
pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every
room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells,
dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then
cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend,
all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house
began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping and
airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and
carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during
which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they
even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit... Repairmen
refused to work in the house...The maid quit...

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided
to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price
in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.
Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to
return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money
from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things
were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She
listened politely, and said that she missed her old home
terribly,
and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in
exchange for getting the house back...

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell
was, he agreed on price that was about 1/10th of
what the house had been worth...But only if she were
to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and
within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as
they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their
new home......including the curtain rods.
User avatar
Azier the Swordsman
 
Posts: 3109
Joined: Sat Oct 11, 2003 10:00 am
Location: Earth

Postby Jasdero » Fri Oct 29, 2004 2:36 pm

XDDD Oh my gosh, is that a real story? That's really funny!
× s h i n i e s , y e s ? ×


does it not burn... LIKE THE SUN?!
User avatar
Jasdero
 
Posts: 2355
Joined: Sat May 01, 2004 5:00 am
Location: BANCOUCH ()[_ò_ó_]()

Postby ShiroiHikari » Fri Oct 29, 2004 2:43 pm

bwahahahaha.
fightin' in the eighties
User avatar
ShiroiHikari
 
Posts: 7564
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Somewhere between 1983 and 1989

Postby EireWolf » Fri Oct 29, 2004 2:44 pm

I have been looking for this story ever since I saw it posted in a restaurant bathroom a while back. It's hilarious. Thanks for sharing! :grin:
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
[indent]~~Gandalf, in Fellowship of the Ring[/indent]
Image
User avatar
EireWolf
 
Posts: 2496
Joined: Thu Jun 26, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: the forests of northern California

Postby Kinkosami » Fri Oct 29, 2004 3:20 pm

Hey, thanks for sharing. That was really funny. :lol:
*~My Signature Image~*
Look at it, you'll be glad you did!


[Minitokyo][FanFiction]

~CLICK HERE~
User avatar
Kinkosami
 
Posts: 425
Joined: Tue Dec 23, 2003 2:11 pm
Location: Colorado

Postby Azier the Swordsman » Fri Oct 29, 2004 4:43 pm

Came in my email today. I'm unsure if it's true, but if it is.... :lol:
User avatar
Azier the Swordsman
 
Posts: 3109
Joined: Sat Oct 11, 2003 10:00 am
Location: Earth

Postby Dragon Master » Fri Oct 29, 2004 4:46 pm

O_o !!! Whoa thats hilarious!
I like hitting things :lickbash:
User avatar
Dragon Master
 
Posts: 144
Joined: Wed Oct 06, 2004 6:21 am
Location: In some Dark Void...


Return to General

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 306 guests