Japanese Marriage Concerns...

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Japanese Marriage Concerns...

Postby Galant » Tue Jan 25, 2005 9:17 am

This article from the BBC from Sept last year that Japanese women maybe showing a trend of not desiring marriage.

Also, Japan debates female succession.

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Postby Mr. Rogers » Tue Jan 25, 2005 9:28 am

japan is becoming very sad....so materialistic they are forgetting everything important
the u.s. is messed up too though
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Postby inkhana » Tue Jan 25, 2005 9:38 am

I don't much care for the attitude that children should be looked to as a "perk" of marriage. The way that article was written made them seem like at least that woman viewed them as an object...*shakes head*


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Postby Ingemar » Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:30 am

Well, Women's Lib is one way to go (into civilizational demise, that is).

This looks very bleak. Coupled with the fact that Japan has a rapidly aging population, the once-populous nation may become half its size in the next two generations (if trends continue). This is also bad for their economy. Even though they depend mostly on imports and exports, someone has to stick around and wash the dishes, drive the busses, fix the cars, etc. etc. Does this mean that Japan, a la Europe and the US will import massive numbers of foreign workers? I'm not sure, though someone informed me this is already the case.

Of course, whether or not this is bad news depends on who you ask. I think the South Koreans will relish this, so that manhwa will soon replace manga as the favorite non-Western media of kids and adults alike here in the States. (Though, this can only happen if childbearing rates in SK don't mirror those of Japan, and if the North doesn't invade the South).
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Postby ShiroiHikari » Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:39 am

well at least they're not getting knocked up and having five kids they can't take care of, like people in this country often do. they seem to realize that children are a huge responsibility. maybe it's better that they're starting to realize that you don't have to be married to be happy, and marriage is also a big responsibility. if they're truly happy being single women, then good for them.

also, doesn't Japan have a population problem? it said the birth rate dropped. that might not be such a terrible thing.
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Postby Technomancer » Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:46 am

I don't think all of the blame can really be dropped at the door of women's lib. Unfortunately, modern society does not readily favour having kids in either its structures or attitudes. The pressures of work and school have made it so that people marry later in life and tend to have less security in which to raise a child. This modern notion of job-hopping and having multiple careers does not lend itself to familial stability. Younger couples are especially vulnerable to this given the usual problems that junior level candidates face: "last hired, first fired". Modern economic conditions also often make it important that there be two incomes.

At the same time, there is much less of a notion of personal sacrifice for one's children. Personal self-fulfillment too often takes precendence, and children for many seem to be an obstacle rather than a blessing. This may be especially problematic in countries that lack good parental leave laws or affordable daycare.

Anyways, as far as the issue of Japanese succession goes: more power to her. It's not like the British suffered any for having women on the throne.
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Postby Ingemar » Tue Jan 25, 2005 11:04 am

Well, many people want to have kids. But few actually want to be parents. That is the key. Modern society is far too self-focused. I guess development is a double edged sword. The advances of modern society make it more likely for an individual to live long, which in turn reduces the need to have offspring to survive oneself.

I find it odd that a nation as fond of tradition as Japan should allow its birthrate to decline. If there are no Japanese people, then there will soon be no Japanese culture. Of course, culture can be always implanted into other groups via contact (and had they won WWII, their culture would have been implanted into other parts of East Asia), but those foreign people lack the worldview (the key component in what makes a person a person), and the effect is diminished.

It is too early to make these judgements. There could always be something to stimulate birthrates, perhaps a sudden upsurge in ultranationalism or something like that.
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Postby White Raven » Tue Jan 25, 2005 11:05 am

I noted that those women didn't say that they didn’t want kids. They just didn’t want to get married to the first man that came along.
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Postby Doubleshadow » Tue Jan 25, 2005 12:26 pm

Hmm. It sounds to me as though economic conditions and a refusal to 'settle' for just any old man are driving this. More Japanesse women are becoming career women, yet still don't make enough to also have a family. In addition, they have decided to become very choosy about their husband, as suppossed to bygone eras when they weren't. It makes sense; no women with half a brain cell would marry a dimwit or have children if she couldn't afford them. $18 dollars an hour for a babysitter?
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Postby Fsiphskilm » Tue Jan 25, 2005 2:33 pm

Their population is st
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Postby Kisa » Tue Jan 25, 2005 2:47 pm

I don't really find the article terrible.
If there is no other heir to the throne then why not have the princess take over when the time comes and one is needed?
Women not getting married as much? I wouldn't settle for just some guy just to get married either. If they haven't met the right one then thats fine. Also it is better than getting married then divorced or having children out of wedlock. I think theyre being smart and I don't blame them.
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Postby Debitt » Tue Jan 25, 2005 3:32 pm

Yumiko said she wanted to get married, but only if she "found a nice guy".

=O; I don't see anything wrong with reasoning like that. >_> Getting married and having kids too early like they do in some middle eastern countries and such is detrimental to a woman's health. My mom didn't get married and have me until she was in her late 30's. ^^;
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Postby Chichiri » Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:16 pm

ShiroiHikari wrote:also, doesn't Japan have a population problem? it said the birth rate dropped. that might not be such a terrible thing.


My thoughts exactly. The cities have such a huge population right now and considering the limited amount of land they have, I don't really see this as much of a problem right now. Could actually be a Godsend, who knows.
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Postby Arnobius » Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:34 pm

:sweat:
OK, first things first. Japan has the lowest birthrate in the world at 1.1 children per couple. There were some people on this thread talking about how good it is that they're not producing a lot of kids. Do you really want to praise them for how they did it? It's called abortion on demand.

Japan is not balanced between young and old. It's not stabilizing. It's *de*stabilizing. Japan is is rapidly becoming the society with the highest average age, expected to have more elderly than young in a few years. It doesn't have an overpopulation problem, it has an aging problem that already alarms their government.

Second, in Japan, getting pregnant is effectively going to get a woman either a) demoted or b) fired. Women are generally expected to quit work when they get married.

Third, the trend of Japanese women being dissatisfied by the attitudes of Japanese men has been long documented. Personally I doubt many (if any) of the women at CAA would tolerate what is expected of Japanese women.
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Postby Debitt » Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:40 pm

AnimeHeretic wrote:Second, in Japan, getting pregnant is effectively going to get a woman either a) demoted or b) fired. Women are generally expected to quit work when they get married.

Third, the trend of Japanese women being dissatisfied by the attitudes of Japanese men has been long documented. Personally I doubt many (if any) of the women at CAA would tolerate what is expected of Japanese women.

<ot>This is part of the reason I think fans who blindly say "=D Omg I wanna live in Japan, I wish I was Japanese!" should go give themselves a swirly.</ot>

EDIT: I mean no offence to anyone who has said this/wants to live in Japan, but it's one of my pet peeves. :sweat:
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Postby Arnobius » Tue Jan 25, 2005 4:47 pm

Kokoro Daisuke wrote:<ot>This is part of the reason I think fans who blindly say "=D Omg I wanna live in Japan, I wish I was Japanese!" should go give themselves a swirly.</ot>

EDIT: I mean no offence to anyone who has said this/wants to live in Japan, but it's one of my pet peeves. :sweat:

When I was a hardcore otaku I used to want to live in Japan. Nowadays, I realize that not only would I not fit in, I wouldn't want to, because I have some values that would be incompatible.

I'd like to visit sometime though...
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Postby haru_bay_nay » Tue Jan 25, 2005 5:16 pm

I agree with AnimeHeretic on the subject of the article and population issue. I also always wanted to live in Japan when I first loved anime, but it would be extremely difficult to accustom to everything. Also, my nature is nothing like a "proper" Japanese woman's. Although visiting does sound like a fun option! ^.^
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Postby Mangafanatic » Tue Jan 25, 2005 5:35 pm

There was nothing really "shocking" in that article to me. It doesn't seem Japanese women thing that marriage is stupid or undesirable. It seemed many of the interviewed women wanted to get married-- eventually. Unfortuneately, alot of them may never find time. But of course, it really wouldn't be bad, IMHO, if they married later in life and adopted. Those children need homes.
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Postby Saint Kevin » Tue Jan 25, 2005 8:14 pm

Volt wrote:There's no use in Pumping out 18+ kids, these aren't the old days of moses anymore.


No, there's no USE (economic advantage) in it, but having kids (to most at least) is not about having more kids to work the farm or the family business. They are a wonderful blessing from God. I personally would not mind having 18 kids (my wife however would probably disagree). As the saying goes, if men gave birth then some might be lucky to have one child, but nobody would ever have two.

Sorry, OT. Anyway I think the main reason people in Japan (and many in America and the rest of the world) are not getting married as much is because marriage just isn't a priority anymore.

I'd like to get married and be a wonderful husband and father. That means more to me than finishing my degree, than getting a job I enjoy, than a lot of things. When it comes down to it, maybe the Lord doesn't have it in His plan for me to get married, and if that is the case, then I will praise God and get on with His work.

Still, how many people do you know that really value marriage that much anymore? It is seen (by those in the world) as a burden, and not a blessing. Yes, many things must be sacrificed to make a marriage work, and to raise children the right way, but when it comes right down to it, many are too selfish to make those sacrifices.

Anyway, I heard an interesting sermon by Albert Mohler, a seminary president that talked about how many singles just aren't getting married these days. Sorry guys, but the blame lies squarely on your shoulders (most of it anyway). I think he's right, and I'm just as guilty as anyone, I'll admit it.

Anyway, I thought I'd post the links to the audio files from the 2004 New Attitude Conference for your consideration.

Part 1

Part 2

I'll warn you that these files are long, and if they are too long for you, maybe you'd like the lite version that was played on Family Life Today.

FLT Excerpt

You might not agree with everything said, but I thought this was interesting enough to share with you all.
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Postby Mave » Tue Jan 25, 2005 9:10 pm

I'm still quite torn when it comes to this topic. I suppose there's no formula that's best for all women, thus "Each woman to God's personal plan for her."

But if you ask me personally, I would like to get married the latest at my early thirties (for biological reasons I believe is most probably true) and I would consider quitting my 9 to 5 job after having children because I think it's important for a mother dedicate her life to educating and nurturing her children especially during their early years. These are my thoughts at the moment.

But I must voice out how irritated I become whenever I hear some women scoff at the roles of housewives and mothers because they are among the most important and admirable people who have a super impact on the society's future. Gah, don't ever look down on the roles God entrusted women with! I'd rather be a great housewife and mother than being some great CEO or political leader.
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Postby Arnobius » Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:05 pm

I certainly see no problem with women who want to take on the role of housewife and mother. It's quite honorable. I do have problems with those who want to keep them solely in those roles. That's what Japanese women are fighting against.

I think it's dangerous to approach the problems of another country through AMerican eyes because there is danger of redefining their problems as the problems we face.
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Postby White Raven » Tue Jan 25, 2005 10:13 pm

Mave wrote:I'm still quite torn when it comes to this topic. I suppose there's no formula that's best for all women, thus "Each woman to God's personal plan for her."

But if you ask me personally, I would like to get married the latest at my early thirties (for biological reasons I believe is most probably true) and I would consider quitting my 9 to 5 job after having children because I think it's important for a mother dedicate her life to educating and nurturing her children especially during their early years. These are my thoughts at the moment.

But I must voice out how irritated I become whenever I hear some women scoff at the roles of housewives and mothers because they are among the most important and admirable people who have a super impact on the society's future. Gah, don't ever look down on the roles God entrusted women with! I'd rather be a great housewife and mother than being some great CEO or political leader.


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