Coming back to God...
PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2009 9:46 pm
Hi guys,
For the past four months I've pretty much been running from God due to some of the things I did that I started feeling guilty over. I quit bible college, moved in with my fiance, did some unmentionables and started hanging around some very drug involved people.
I'm asking for prayer that I can have the strength and lack of pride to be able to go completely back to God.
I've felt like such a hippocrite because I keep helping other people out with their "christian issues" when I myself haven't been where I needed to be.
Now I'm happy to announce that I have moved back in with my parents, started going back to church, reading my bible and all the other things I need to do, but I'm still finding myself wanting to go back to the freedom to do what I want instead of what God wants for me. Strength really is my biggest issue right now.
Also I'd like to add in my relationship with my fiance: he is a christian, but he isn't the strongest in discipline (neither am I) so this puts a strain on us when we are together. We both are trying to go back to abstinency before marriage, but we're finding it hard. It seems to be harder for him though since he has more of a "background"
We also recently had a problem where he was flirting and constantly hanging out alone with a young girl from our church and that started some trust issues for me. It's hard for me to trust men and this doesn't make it any easier. Although he stopped hanging with her alone, he is still the song writter for their band and he doesn't seem to see why I don't like him around her. He already admitted there have been some major tempting times with her and she doesn't make it any easier by hanging on him (she knows he's engaged to me). I love him, but it's been a hard start just because of how we did things starting four months ago... and both of our maturity levels have something to do with it, I'm sure.
Now he's not trusting me as much as he should due to some supposed "proofs" that I cheated on him. (this happened before but they were easier to prove wrong and a completely different situation). He told me just today that he is about 65% sure that I am telling him the truth so he is going to stay with me until he finds a reason to dis-trust me. Just to make it clear, I have been faithful to him from the start of our relationship... that's one thing I didn't back-slide from.
We decided to start again on rebuilding trust and to wait a year to get married... I guess I'm just asking that you guys pray for God's will in our relationship to happen. I know there is probably a chance that we won't last, but I'd like to think we will and all these things are just road blocks for us.
We have both talked to the pastor and he told us to put God first in everything so we are trying to do that instead of worrying so much about our relationship lasting, but it's hard when that's all you've known for an extended period of time.
Thanks in advance guys!
Gala
For the past four months I've pretty much been running from God due to some of the things I did that I started feeling guilty over. I quit bible college, moved in with my fiance, did some unmentionables and started hanging around some very drug involved people.
I'm asking for prayer that I can have the strength and lack of pride to be able to go completely back to God.
I've felt like such a hippocrite because I keep helping other people out with their "christian issues" when I myself haven't been where I needed to be.
Now I'm happy to announce that I have moved back in with my parents, started going back to church, reading my bible and all the other things I need to do, but I'm still finding myself wanting to go back to the freedom to do what I want instead of what God wants for me. Strength really is my biggest issue right now.
Also I'd like to add in my relationship with my fiance: he is a christian, but he isn't the strongest in discipline (neither am I) so this puts a strain on us when we are together. We both are trying to go back to abstinency before marriage, but we're finding it hard. It seems to be harder for him though since he has more of a "background"
We also recently had a problem where he was flirting and constantly hanging out alone with a young girl from our church and that started some trust issues for me. It's hard for me to trust men and this doesn't make it any easier. Although he stopped hanging with her alone, he is still the song writter for their band and he doesn't seem to see why I don't like him around her. He already admitted there have been some major tempting times with her and she doesn't make it any easier by hanging on him (she knows he's engaged to me). I love him, but it's been a hard start just because of how we did things starting four months ago... and both of our maturity levels have something to do with it, I'm sure.
Now he's not trusting me as much as he should due to some supposed "proofs" that I cheated on him. (this happened before but they were easier to prove wrong and a completely different situation). He told me just today that he is about 65% sure that I am telling him the truth so he is going to stay with me until he finds a reason to dis-trust me. Just to make it clear, I have been faithful to him from the start of our relationship... that's one thing I didn't back-slide from.
We decided to start again on rebuilding trust and to wait a year to get married... I guess I'm just asking that you guys pray for God's will in our relationship to happen. I know there is probably a chance that we won't last, but I'd like to think we will and all these things are just road blocks for us.
We have both talked to the pastor and he told us to put God first in everything so we are trying to do that instead of worrying so much about our relationship lasting, but it's hard when that's all you've known for an extended period of time.
Thanks in advance guys!
Gala
. I'm sorry. Praying for you.