Perfect...
PostPosted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 4:18 pm
It's finally my turn to ask for prayer. 
I got this Bible school application form in the mail that I've been going to for the last three years or so. It's a Bible school that my Mom and Dad have been sending me the past several years. The first time I had gone I really took my Christianity seriously, and I considered it a great blessing.
Unfortunately, over the course of the past several years, my theology has shifted so dramatically that I now disagree with the majority of things taught there. (They teach a lot of their things over and over again) Being a big listener to debates and MP3's of discussions by sharp-minded Christians, I've developed a sharp critical mind towards the things I disagree with, and the last two times I went I have had more objections and disagreements to the things taught there. It's not so much a matter of disagreement that bothers me, but it's that people there are preaching ridiculous unbiblical things that will make the Christian life harder for those there too ignorant to know any better. People listening with all fervor and reverence that will uncritically soak it up and suffer all sorts of spiritual uneasiness in the future. That makes me angry inside and I need to vent for ages afterwards. And I mean like different times over the course of multiple months.
On top of that, the schedule is really gruelling and taxing on the body. It's all day long sermons with people who can't seem to get this after all this time, and on top of that, the microscopic break time is usually even smaller in length because they are not sensitive to how long they're allowed to preach (this on top of almost never extending the break time for us and expecting US to be punctual while they are not). It's in November, and with the cold weather, sermons all day long, hardly any break time in between them, preachers who won't be sensitive to when they need to stop preaching, bad theology, etc., I've begun to hate going there. Especially last time. It was just nuts.
On a smaller note, I have to room at a house. And staying at someone else's house (unless it's a very close relative's house) is reeeeeeally uncomfortable for me. Now the people I stayed with the last two times are absolutely angels, but that doesn't matter. Stress builds up from being in a totally unfamiliar environment as a replacement for one that is all (or mostly all) my own.
Take all the stress from all those three things and put them together. It's pretty ugly.
My hope is that I don't end up there this year. I just got the form in, and I anticipate having to tell my Mom and Dad how I feel. That's really the only way to go, but honestly, the last time my older sister wanted to stay home from Bible school (for college reasons) they practically had a conniption fit. So the solution is clear, but I can't see my parents not forcing me to go without some miracle and/or divine intervention.
I'm afraid that going there is simply going to hurt my spiritual health more than the 1/3 of good stuff that is there. I hate going there, it's not good for me, but my Mom and Dad who already are not happy with my theology shift will be just as insistent on making me go. They'll probably take it as another theological step downwards.
So my prayer request is 1. That I won't go to this Bible school, and 2. That my parents will understand and not force me to go.
P.S. My parents are God-fearing parents who care about my spiritual health very much. They are very kind and loving towards me and are not abusive at all. I was very fortunate to have them as parents. But, in all christian love, they have no idea how to handle anyone daring to reject going to a Bible school. I guess deciding not to go to a Bible school is automatically a sign of spiritual decay DESPITE THE FACT that I disagree with their beliefs like they would if they went to, say, a catholic Bible school.
I got this Bible school application form in the mail that I've been going to for the last three years or so. It's a Bible school that my Mom and Dad have been sending me the past several years. The first time I had gone I really took my Christianity seriously, and I considered it a great blessing.
Unfortunately, over the course of the past several years, my theology has shifted so dramatically that I now disagree with the majority of things taught there. (They teach a lot of their things over and over again) Being a big listener to debates and MP3's of discussions by sharp-minded Christians, I've developed a sharp critical mind towards the things I disagree with, and the last two times I went I have had more objections and disagreements to the things taught there. It's not so much a matter of disagreement that bothers me, but it's that people there are preaching ridiculous unbiblical things that will make the Christian life harder for those there too ignorant to know any better. People listening with all fervor and reverence that will uncritically soak it up and suffer all sorts of spiritual uneasiness in the future. That makes me angry inside and I need to vent for ages afterwards. And I mean like different times over the course of multiple months.
On top of that, the schedule is really gruelling and taxing on the body. It's all day long sermons with people who can't seem to get this after all this time, and on top of that, the microscopic break time is usually even smaller in length because they are not sensitive to how long they're allowed to preach (this on top of almost never extending the break time for us and expecting US to be punctual while they are not). It's in November, and with the cold weather, sermons all day long, hardly any break time in between them, preachers who won't be sensitive to when they need to stop preaching, bad theology, etc., I've begun to hate going there. Especially last time. It was just nuts.
On a smaller note, I have to room at a house. And staying at someone else's house (unless it's a very close relative's house) is reeeeeeally uncomfortable for me. Now the people I stayed with the last two times are absolutely angels, but that doesn't matter. Stress builds up from being in a totally unfamiliar environment as a replacement for one that is all (or mostly all) my own.
Take all the stress from all those three things and put them together. It's pretty ugly.
My hope is that I don't end up there this year. I just got the form in, and I anticipate having to tell my Mom and Dad how I feel. That's really the only way to go, but honestly, the last time my older sister wanted to stay home from Bible school (for college reasons) they practically had a conniption fit. So the solution is clear, but I can't see my parents not forcing me to go without some miracle and/or divine intervention.
I'm afraid that going there is simply going to hurt my spiritual health more than the 1/3 of good stuff that is there. I hate going there, it's not good for me, but my Mom and Dad who already are not happy with my theology shift will be just as insistent on making me go. They'll probably take it as another theological step downwards.
So my prayer request is 1. That I won't go to this Bible school, and 2. That my parents will understand and not force me to go.
P.S. My parents are God-fearing parents who care about my spiritual health very much. They are very kind and loving towards me and are not abusive at all. I was very fortunate to have them as parents. But, in all christian love, they have no idea how to handle anyone daring to reject going to a Bible school. I guess deciding not to go to a Bible school is automatically a sign of spiritual decay DESPITE THE FACT that I disagree with their beliefs like they would if they went to, say, a catholic Bible school.
I'm sure your prayers played a part in causing events to work out like this.