Postby chelle0227 » Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:04 pm
I can't take it any more.
I'm ready to just dissapear and have no one find me, or just kill my self and be done with it. I'm tired of being treated like i don't exsist or treated like a freak. All people seem to think about lately is themselves no one else. My dad in particular.
I called my house to check up on my mom, as i said i would, and my dad was there. Well he answered the phone, and started yelling at me because i apparently never told him i was going to michigan. Which i had, cause him and my mom had talked about letting me go. He kept complaining because nothing in the house was going to get done, if i didn't do it. And he was really really angry at me for leaving. so he put me in a bad mood. He also said in our conversation that I was the defiant child, and that i should have never been born. (story, my parents never wanted a child they did "it" and had me, and i was never meant to be) So I ended up getting really mad and hanging up on him, and leaving my aunts house and walking around the town on a badly sprained ankle (went on moolight hike, twisted it in a hole, and something snapped) so yeah, not my best of days.
Please pray that my dad gets over what ever his problem is. He always says stuff like that. and it really hurts. I feel like just walking to the lake that isn't far from here, and jumping in and never resurfacing.
Footprints in the sand by Carolyn Joyce Carty
One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the lord.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene he noticed two sets of foot prints in the sand: one belonging to him the other to the lord.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the foot prints in the sand.
He noticed that name times along the path of his life there was only one set o footprints.
He also noticed that it was at the lowest and saddest times of his life.
This really bothered him and he questioned the lord about it:
"lord, you said once i decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But i have noticed during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of foot prints. I dont understand why when i needed you most you would leave me."
The lord replied:
"My son, my precious child, I love you and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that i carried you."