CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

There is a very dark side of my heart that I would rather remain ignorant of, but recently, I have been having thought of my family dying. My family is very low income, we basically don't have enough to pay for the bills. I can see there are resentment for my father who wouldn't work (he has bad eye sight, poor health, and can't speak well). I understand that it is hypocritical to expect gender equality in family; a male who can't work is a disgrace.

I can already see his death near, a human cannot live with food and bread alone. I always envy the family where someone died of illness, and sometimes I would wish for the death of someone instead of this mind numbing "peace" where everyone just mind their own business. Is it evil to wish for the death of someone? Is there any value to a human life who live a silent life?

Well, I don't think that we should wish for the death of someone. To me that sounds a little on the darkside right along with hate. If you mean it in the sense of either drawing people's attention or putting them out of their misery, then I can see why you might think that. But don't give up hope, it's times like this that should bring you and your family closer to God. The Lord might not let one of your family to pass away to grab your attention unless its absolutely necessary to His will. I don't know if I can really imagine what your going through right now, but I can try to sympathize with you. Remember Jesus went through more tortuous things than we do daily. Also its really great that the Lord has blessed you with this sight of wisdom. Do the others see the problems that you see arising? If not then the Lord is imparting this foresight so you can improve your family in their lives and their walk with Christ. Believe me, Id rather know than to not know at all. On our Bible test there was a question saying "Its better to know that you are in need of help from God than to be one that will never know." Ah, it may be a little bit off but I think thats what it said. Anyway, remain with the Lord and never forget Him so He will never forget you(Not that He will forget you, just so that He will recognize you when you are Judged before God. If not, than He will say "I never knew you."). And also try to keep a peaceful but awareful state of mind. It's not good to stress over this stuff, but you can't sit back either. So I know y'all will make it out of this problem through the help of God. Well I'll be praying for you.

I believe there is value in all life. While any human lives, there is a great potential that also exists.

Even a quadruple amputee that is deaf, blind, and mute would have a value that can not be calculated.

If nothing else, he is loved by God, and that gives him worth. He is worthy of respect and compassion, but not pity.

Two words: Nick Vujicic. I would encourage you to look him up and be humbled and amazed at what God has done to make him who he is now.

Unfortunately, my family (except me) is not Christian and we don't live together (I am in University), so there is only so much I can do for them. My sister and mother are busy working, leaving my father at home to rot. Perhaps, the garden and flowers has become his only friend at home, but it will be sold soon because we are broke. I can't imagine how father can live in an apartment without anyone to talk to. Whenever I tried to bring up the subject, everyone will put blames to my father not able to work. Will there ever be a resolution beside death? I have no idea.

Even if God loves everyone, if they remain oblivious they will never see it. I wish there is more I can do for them. Sadly they will turn themself off if I ever mentioned religion.

K. Ayato, i thought the same exact thing, he's an inspiration.

SnEptUne, instead of wishing death on your father, even if its out of love or pity, pray for life and healing for him. I promise you, one way or another, God will answer that prayer. Also if your the only christian in the house, set the example. I'm not sure of how old you are, but take your dad out, call him, raise his spirits. Maybe the resentment of his family that's around him is causing him to be that way, and not able to pull out of it. He needs your support. I'm sure he doesn't want to be a burden, and I'm equally sure that he wants to work, but can't find the motivation because his family around him is stepping on him for not doing it in the first place.

I hope that helps, and I'll be praying for your family dude. 8D

Definetly praying!

[quote="SnEptUne (post: 1227594)"]There is a very dark side of my heart that I would rather remain ignorant of, but recently, I have been having thought of my family dying. My family is very low income, we basically don't have enough to pay for the bills. I can see there are resentment for my father who wouldn't work (he has bad eye sight, poor health, and can't speak well). I understand that it is hypocritical to expect gender equality in family]

Question #1 - Hmmm... If I were to look at someone dying who was going through excruciating pain, I would wish for their death so that the pain would stop. That in my mind shows concern rather than malicious intent behind the death wish. It seems to be more concern than anything, so no, it isn't evil. However, I'd say it's more caring to pray for his life to improve.

Question #2 - From our perspective, we may not see it. But to God who controls everything according to this will, there is value to everything, including a human living a silent life.

Thanks. I will do what I can, although I am not sure how much I can help. I am not the nicest person in the family either; I am stubborn and sadistic, and I can't even fake a smile. Perhaps, one day, my family can come to accept each other.

If I can be perfectly frank, what is the deal with your father's death? What resolution or circumstances would it bring to a head? The reasoning behind your desire troubles me more than the desire itself.

Fish and Chips (post: 1227760) wrote:If I can be perfectly frank, what is the deal with your father's death? What resolution or circumstances would it bring to a head? The reasoning behind your desire troubles me more than the desire itself.

Because of the family conflicts, he often refused to eat, he smoked until he had coughing fits, he was often exposed to and inhaled harmful household chemical because he was forced to do housework, he had trouble seeing, he occasionally locked himself in basement. His health is declining, and my mom always mentions that it would be good if he dies being a burden that he is. His hatred for the family seems to be his only driving force in life.

Still praying!
GOD BLESS YOU!