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Prayer for... myself >>..

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 1:24 am
by Takuya
Not even sure what to type.. or, heck, where to start.

Well for one thing, I tend to use some mild lang. ...Yeah, sounds bad, huh? Well, prep yourself T_T...


Okay, so where DO I start? ...Oh yes...

So I'm homeschooled out in the middle of NOWHERE. I have two friends that I've met face-to-face. Mike and Frankey. Mike's like... an adult now and I don't get to see EITHER of them hardly. So my mom and I ended up trying out a new church recently. I forget what it was... International Gospel... something.. anyway, so, earlier this week... ...Wednesday... we went for Biblestudy. First guy I ran into was a dude named... uhh... I forgot his name. Anyway, so after class the youth minister mentioned a decipleship program and I JUMPED at it. Hey, TWO GOOD THINGS, 1.) getting closer to God.. 2.) Teens... CHRISTIAN teens... AND he mentioned a fund-raiser thingie going on... err... ...today... ...Saturday...

My mom said no to both >>... she's got good reasons, but that doesn't seem to help, knowing that.

Mark one on depression.

Also, I've already been pretty depressable these past months... (I HATE HOROMONES!!!!)

So then I try to tell my friend last night I kinda like her and... that... well... ...think shaking up a pop-top water bottle... ya know... like the sports stuff... full of SODA... then OPENING... *BOOM* You get the idea... so one wrong word and well...

Mark TWO on depression.

Then earlier today... well... ...another girl managed to play with me a little... I'm, not saying how....

Three... Fizzing over...

And then, guess what, My best friend/RP partner and her boyfriend had a fight. They were pretty much on the edge. ...Then I realized I actually liked her a little (big surprize when your main RP theme is romance >.>)... so my nose smells a hole. Yeah... good thing I'm friends with her BF, I was a little torn between ME and THEM... ...Thank GOD I didn't mess up there... ...I didn't even say anything about myself (except that I felt weird so I couldn't think as well)... well, yeah...

FOUR!! 'SPLODE!! 'SPLODE!!!

So I've made myself an emotional WRECK... still stressing over mark three...

Then I... come around here then notice I'm always ignored and at least two people here actually hate me... literally...

Mark five? Yeah...

So by this point I have now dubbed myself an emotional wreck saying... what... well... was true... I've NEVER been this emotionally unstable in my LIFE...

So then I finally decide after it's really late to get on Star Craft... ...I decide I'ma pwn someone... HARD... first loss... all's good, I'm having fun... second game... the computer never gave me the stupid WIN-POINT for... ><... second loss, uh oh, me not happy,.... fourth... EMO!!! EMO!!! EMO!!! So then I decide to join my clanner friend in some comp-stomp action and WE LOSE!!!

MARK SIX...


Oh yeah... I need help... BIG help.... T_T... PLEASE PRAY!!!!!! ToT

EDIT: Oh yes, that also includes the friends and close to God dealies... ...

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 1:41 am
by Jingo Jaden
I will pray.

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 8:35 am
by Takuya
Thanks.. ^^

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 10:30 am
by Tenshi no Ai
I'll be praying for you as well...

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 11:18 am
by USSRGirl
Your in my prayer. I know how this stuff can really pile up. Just hang in there, and keep strong.

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 12:32 pm
by Destroyer2000
Yeah, depression sucks, but I would say that you should do some serious thinking about who you like. If you don't know them really well, then it isn't worth it - a relationship will cause pain in the end, usually. As for the Starcraft deal...why get depressed over that?

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 12:43 pm
by Mr. SmartyPants
I will pray.

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 1:45 pm
by Denimcat
Yep, being homeschooled sucks.

As can feelings of love screwing up a friendship.

Praying for you.

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 7:26 pm
by Takuya
Destroyer2000 wrote:Yeah, depression sucks, but I would say that you should do some serious thinking about who you like. If you don't know them really well, then it isn't worth it - a relationship will cause pain in the end, usually. As for the Starcraft deal...why get depressed over that?

...I was already in horrible condition... even the slightest thing would make it all even worse...

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 7:39 pm
by Takuya
Denimcat wrote:Yep, being homeschooled sucks.

As can feelings of love screwing up a friendship.

Praying for you.


...Well I'm all for being homeschooled, but it's freaking insane when your parrents don't even bother to take you where you can hang out with people...

PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 8:05 pm
by Althaia
hang in there takuya i am sure it will get better but in the mean time i shall pray you get thourgh this i am open fo pms if you need to talk *still cannot get on chat right now til further notice from mother*

PostPosted: Sun Feb 04, 2007 2:43 am
by Mave
Takuya wrote:
Well for one thing, I tend to use some mild lang. ...Yeah, sounds bad, huh?

Well, considering that I haven't seen any language in this post, give yourself 100 cool points. I have to make a conscious effort not to use language when I'm mad (it's not easy).

If you're new to a church, don't be too hard on yourself. It usually takes at least 3-4 months before one starts settling down and making friends. I've changed churches quite a bit (due to moving) so I know how it feels to be a newbie in a church (it sucks quite a bit actually).

So then I try to tell my friend last night I kinda like her and... that... well... ...think shaking up a pop-top water bottle... ya know... like the sports stuff... full of SODA... then OPENING... *BOOM* You get the idea... so one wrong word and well...

I'm guessing that didn't go too well and I'm sorry to hear that. Will pray for you to rise above that.

Then earlier today... well... ...another girl managed to play with me a little... I'm, not saying how....

Same thing here.

And then, guess what, My best friend/RP partner and her boyfriend had a fight. They were pretty much on the edge. ...Then I realized I actually liked her a little (big surprize when your main RP theme is romance >.>)... so my nose smells a hole. Yeah... good thing I'm friends with her BF, I was a little torn between ME and THEM... ...Thank GOD I didn't mess up there... ...I didn't even say anything about myself (except that I felt weird so I couldn't think as well)...

Sounds like something you need to stay out of, for your own sake. Hope you did and hope their relationship wouldn't affect you in the future.

Then I... come around here then notice I'm always ignored and at least two people here actually hate me... literally...

Hmm......be careful not to make conclusions like that too quickly. CAA is a huge community and the actions of 1 or 2 ppl do not represent the majority.

So by this point I have now dubbed myself an emotional wreck saying... what... well... was true... I've NEVER been this emotionally unstable in my LIFE...

Hang on there. Do not automatically dub yourself as that. That only serves to deceive yourself further and to make yourself feel worse. If you have power biblical verses to lift you up, use them. :) Try talking it out with God (aka praying) and since you've already asked ppl to pray for you here, you're done quite well so far.

So then I finally decide after it's really late to get on Star Craft... ...I decide I'ma pwn someone... HARD... first loss... all's good, I'm having fun... second game... the computer never gave me the stupid WIN-POINT for... ><... second loss, uh oh, me not happy,.... fourth... EMO!!! EMO!!! EMO!!! So then I decide to join my clanner friend in some comp-stomp action and WE LOSE!!!

It's typical to get upset over things like this when you have other factors building onto the emotion. The best I can say is it's OK to lose although it may not make you feel better.

You have ppl praying for you and offering availability to PMs. So in a way, you're quite blessed. :) I will pray for you as well so stay cool and resilient on our behalf!