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Discouraged and ready to snap..

PostPosted: Thu Sep 15, 2005 6:13 pm
by the_lizardqueen
I'm a week into 2nd Year Design and I am having so many doubts, I don't believe that I can handle this, or that I'm cut out for the program. I'm not even sure of my odds of getting a career in the field, if I can survive college.

I spent all day today trying to produce a concept for an abstract composition that evokes a machine and I still haven't found one that even looks remotely mediocre, and we were supposed to be painting the project this afternoon. I'll probably be up all night trying to produce an okay concept in the hopes that I can sucessfully run it by one of the teachers tomorrow. The execution of the machine project is supposed to take 15 hours, and that's in addition to an accurate skeletal anatomy chart, a letterform analysis and duplication, Art History reading, and a perspective composition that I'm doing for my other classes.

I am totally on the brink of a panic attack. I am feeling tremendously socially isolated, and my teachers keep treating me like a non-entity (they rarely offer any advice or encouragement), and I'm reeling from sleep-depravation. Plus I get pretty disconcerted whenever I present my work and everyone just stares at it blankly. I know I'm mentally exagerating the reaction, but it always seems like the other pieces cause discussions, while mine are sorta..'blah', and cue the chirping crickets. I guess it could be worse, they could get ripped apart verbally, or literally, but I'm dreading that that'll happen eventually.

I've pretty much been on the verge of tears since 2:00 this afternoon. And if I want to have any hope of getting all of my homework done, I'll probably have to work every waking hour this weekend, the prospect of which really makes me want to go curl up in the fetal position and mentally shut down for a few hours.

I would really, really appreciate prayer right now.

PostPosted: Thu Sep 15, 2005 8:48 pm
by freerock1
Lifting you. I know it sounds cliched, but God is not the author of confusion but of peace, and He desires you to have peace in your heart.

PostPosted: Fri Sep 16, 2005 6:42 am
by termyt
May God grant you peace. Take one day and one project at a time and worry about your future employment later.

PostPosted: Fri Sep 16, 2005 7:27 am
by shooraijin
Right. Don't get swept away by the possibilities off in the future. If you do, you're just going to make your head swim. Focus on what's going to get you through 'til Monday.

PostPosted: Fri Sep 16, 2005 9:33 am
by kazekami
I'll pray for you. It's hard when you have so much to do like that. Focus on getting done what you need to get done for monday. And take it one day at a time.

PostPosted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 4:09 am
by faithfighter
you will be in my prayers.
and here are some verses on worry that might help you.

"who of you by worrying can add a single day to your life? if you can not do this simple thing why worry about the rest?"~Luke 12:25-26

"Do not be anxiouse about anything but in everything, by prayer and petition, w/thanksgiving present your request to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will gaurd you heart and mind in Christ Jesus."~ Phillipians 4:6-7

PostPosted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 4:26 am
by CreatureArt
I'm praying for you, LQ. Hang in there.

PostPosted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 10:35 am
by Spiritsword
I will pray.

PostPosted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 10:46 am
by agasfas
I too am faced with doubt on occasion whether or not the major I'm in is for me. So perhaps I understand where you are coming from. I will pray for you. I hope things go alright.

PostPosted: Sat Sep 17, 2005 11:23 am
by Alice
~Prayer~

Please take care of yourself. Remember beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You may have stuck-up classmates or something, but that doesn't mean your stuff is no good.

I'm praying for you.

PostPosted: Mon Sep 19, 2005 9:35 pm
by the_lizardqueen
I want to thank you all so much for your replies, advice and support. I'm feeling significantly calmer now, and somewhat sheepish about the panicked rant/freak out that I posted :sweat:

My mechanical composition still leaves alot to be desired, and now I've gone and thrown the craft out the window on the final rendition (there's wobbly lines and gouache splotches everywhere), but I do feel at peace, strangely enough. Now it remains to be seen if I'm still so calm at critique on Thursday morning, but I'm focusing too far ahead again. Yup, one day at a time.. *will probably be repeating that for a while to come*

I should probably get back to work on my anatomy homework. Thanks again ^_^

PostPosted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 3:59 am
by snow_Rock
ye! cheer up. i myself am tormented everyday, but think about Paul, who is beaten, bruised and stoned almost everyday. Not to mention getting imprisoned. But still, he managed to find peace and joy in the Lord. I've read it in Ephesians. My prayers assured

PostPosted: Wed Sep 21, 2005 2:17 pm
by Rogie
Sorry that I missed your request until now, but I'll continue praying for you, especially as I'm feeling similar sorts of stress right now. Shoo's advice to take it one day at a time is indeed great. (I'll have to start saying that to myself, too! :sweat: )