CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

I hate my life, plain and simple. I'm an idiot, and I openly and freely admit this, and don't blame God for any of it, because it's my own stupid fault.

Before I left for Otakon, I had a little over 2 grand in the bank. However, I was stupid, and spent more money than I should have there. So now, I have a negative account balance...or should I say, I WILL once the Comfort Inn in Maryland tries to collect on my payment for the hotel (assuming the bank doesn't deny them outright, in which case I don't know what will happen, but I'm sure it will suck).

I've already had to borrow $200 from my mom. I'm sure about $100 of that is going to go to books for my classes this semester...assuming the books are $50 apiece, and that's no guarantee (the physics one could be well over a hundred).

So the rest of that has to pay for my gas until I get my GI Bill money...which, by the way, won't be showing up for probably a month or more. Doesn't help that with gas prices the way they are, I have to drive 360 miles EVERY WEEK to get to classes (60 miles every day except Thursday, when I have to drive 120 miles).

Oh yeah, also add on the fact that my car insurance payment is about a week overdue. AND, on top of that, my car now has a flat tire, and I have no money to get a new tire.

Oh, and I don't have a job, so I have no paychecks coming other than my GI Bill. Which, as I said, won't show up for another month or so.

I'm so stupid...I never should've gone to Otakon...then I never would've spent all that freakin' money... ><

Oh yeah, did I mention that I probably have depression? Not the emotion, but the medical condition. So...yeah. Fun.

I'm not suicidal. And I'm in no danger of losing my faith, because my faith in God is rock-solid.

But I literally have no clue what I'm going to do...or how I'm going to do anything...and I don't know...anything, really.

So...I don't know what to pray for. Other than for me to actually somehow become intelligent overnight. Or win the lottery.

And somehow, I don't see either one happening...

You know I'll be praying for you, Kae. I'm sorry all this junk is going on.

oh i am so sorry...I will pray for you, my mom tells me that when bad stuff like that happens to me or my family, we allways say that god will allways help and he may be showing you a lesson in this, i dont know. I am sorry, but ill try my best to help!

Hey, sounds awful, I'm really sorry about all that!

So I know this sounds really cliche and obvious, but it's true, so I'll say it anyways. . . God can provide everything that you need with extreme ease. I experienced this first-hand when I went on my missions trip this past summer and he provided me with over $550 dollars from the places I least expected when I needed it most; he can do it totally easily for you. Just trust him completely, try not to worry, and ask him to take care of you. He's watching out for you!

As for the depression, I'll pray that God'll take that out of your life. It's rough, and I know you definitely don't need it right now. Anyways, I'll just pray for you about all this. Hope things get better!!

I can relate. Earlier this summer I found out that I was in the hole with my account, having written bad checks without even knowing it. It was dumb on my part for not keeping up with my checks and balances for so many months

My parents have their own financial problems, so it's never comfortable asking them for money (especially when they act like they don't want to give you money ).

When I was working back in June, I was only working 3 hours for 3 days a week. And what made it suck even more was the fact that I wouldn't get paid until the end of the month. Driving 45 minutes away every day, I had very little money to feed myself before and after work. I was in a very tight situation and the last thing I needed was to get paid at the END of the month! But I kept telling myself it was better to get paid late than not at all.

However, I learned several things through my situation. First, I learned to rely more on God to provide for my needs, and not so much on my parents or anyone or anything else. I prayed long and hard for God to bless me financially to the point where I could be comfortable in my finances again. Secondly, I have also learned to spend my money more wisely, and not buy everything my heart desires, at least not at any given moment. It took this situation to help me to learn to keep money in my pockets.

Anyway, it's never fun having no money when you need it most. Besides asking for God to bless you with finances, I don't know what to pray for either. But God knows all, even before we think to ask it.

Hey, I know what it's like having nearly nothing in your account. I got a ticket (Can you believe it?) and it was only fair that I paid half the amount for the ticket, traffic school information, and half of the traffic school enrollment fee itself. That left me with less than $100 dollars in my account, and I was frantic to add more money to keep it up and still running.

It's true of what Yumie said. God knows you're having financial troubles. He's got a way to get you through it. All you have to do is let go of yourself and hold onto Him. I remember the man George Muller who started an orphanage many years ago in England never asked anyone to help provide when a need came up. He took it totally to God. There's an amazing story of how God helped the workers and the children have enough to eat when they were out of food. You can PM me for it if you're interested.

I'm sorry it's so tough on you, kae. Just remember, this is all for a reason, and one day you'll come out of it shining like gold. *Hugs* I'm still praying for you.

It sounds like you already know the root of the problem, so there's no use in anyone pointing it out. I can think of a couple of possible options, if you want advice.

1. Pre-Check check cashing places. Some of these places will spot you your paycheck money for a pretty nasty fee. I really don't recommend these kinds of places, if you can avoid them.

2. Day labor. If you don't think it's benieth you, lots of construction crews need a strong back for a day or two on the week/ends. The pay is usually cash out at the end of the day, but it can be decent pay. If you know a general contractor (goes to your church or whatever), you might try calling them up. They often need a spare set of hands on a very quick term basis.

Anyway, that's all I can think of right now. I hope you wanted advice - I know people don't always when they post things like this.


Good luck!

Eh....everyone makes mistakes from time to time so don't beat yourself over. When you're down, the only way is up, right? Hang on there, Kae..you're a tough person, you'll get through it with God along the way.

I'm no financial advisor but have you considered selling some of your stuff (even stuff you bought in Otakon), which you don't really need?

Also, what type of jobs are available to you? I generally don't care what I have to do, as long as it qualifies as the average pay rate. I used to work in dorm cafeterias to support myself when I was 'homeless'.

Is there a reason why you're commuting so much?

As for college books, try to buy secondhand books from students (not from bookstores, those bloodsuckers!). Get to know seniors of your major who took a certain class before or check out if your friends have taken it before. If you're lucky, you can borrow the book from them.

Becoming intelligent or winning the lottery doesn't sound like a solution to me. I think I'll pray for patience, perseverance, faith and God's wisdom in your life challenges. After all, our money belongs to God and He is the best advisor of all.

I will pray

hey pray...and turst God...and learn from your mistakes i will pray

kaemmerite wrote:I hate my life, plain and simple. I'm an idiot, and I openly and freely admit this, and don't blame God for any of it, because it's my own stupid fault.

Hey, you're not an idiot!!! You made a mistake, it happens, so don't be so hard on yourself! As far as your possible depression goes, I sure hope you don't have it. That condition... it's hard, it really is. If you do have it, I suggest getting medication for it immediately.

As far as $$ goes, I will pray that God will show you the way. I'll pray about everything, Kae. Good luck.

(Sorry if that seemed a bit hard, I didn't mean it to. So I'm sorry about that.)

Mithrandir wrote:2. Day labor. If you don't think it's benieth you, lots of construction crews need a strong back for a day or two on the week/ends. The pay is usually cash out at the end of the day, but it can be decent pay. If you know a general contractor (goes to your church or whatever), you might try calling them up. They often need a spare set of hands on a very quick term basis.

A few times a month I help my step dad scrap metal to help make the morgage. It's tough work and you get dirty, but money is money.

Whatever the case, I have faith things will work out for you in the end.
We all make mistakes, and trust me, I've made my share of them, but try not to give up hope.

I remember in highschool my english teacher asked us to creat a list of the things we would like to change, or negatives we see in ourselves. Then afterwards she asked the class to create a list of positives. Everyone in the class had much longer negative list then postive. I guess my main point is that it's easier to find fualt in ourselves then to focus on the postive things we have going for us. And it we never look towards the postives we will always be depressed. I'll admit, I sometimes stumble when it comes to these thoughts; I think we all do at times. But I always remember that the Lord has gifted us all with unique qualities and that He created us out of Love.

Since you already have a list of things you find negative, why not try creating a list of poistive things/aspects of your life? Things like the Lord, your family, friends and etc. And yes, CAA friends do count... Try not to tell yourself there's nothing, because it's not true.

Perhaps it's not much advice, but it may help you feel better by focusing on the positives. Never know. It sometimes helps me when I get down.

I'll be praying for you bud. Good luck.

[quote="agasfas"]
I remember in highschool my english teacher asked us to creat a list of the things we would like to change, or negatives we see in ourselves. Then afterwards she asked the class to create a list of positives. Everyone in the class had much longer negative list then postive. I guess my main point is that it's easier to find fualt in ourselves then to focus on the postive things we have going for us. And it we never look towards the postives we will always be depressed. I'll admit, I sometimes stumble when it comes to these thoughts]
That's a really good idea. Give it a shot, man!

Hey, man you'll get through this. I still live with my parents, so I cannot relate to you on the financial part, but I am also depressed right now in my life. I'll be praying.

Mistakes happen so that you'll learn from them and lead a better a life. For many people say, "This too shall pass," one way or another. Lord help me if I'm being too cliche. When I don't know where my life is going or think I'm completely hopeless, it's probably a good time to let God take over, because He will lead you where He wants you. But I'll pray for you too, man.

My advice on the flat tire would be to air it up and see if it stays up. Sometimes it's just a small leak. If it goes flat again, see if you can get it fixed at a place where they can bill you and you can pay it off gradually. If you get it fixed, make sure they put a boot in it, and not a plug (a rubber cork). Plugs often fail, boots (a patch glued to the inside of the tire that covers the hole) often last. It shouldn't cost you more than 20 bucks. On your car, tires are the most important part, they're all that's keeping you on the road, road, so don't skimp repairing them.

As far as the books go, see if you can start without them, or borrow some from a classmate until you can get the money for them. The bookstore may let you have them if they know you have financial aid coming. Used textbooks are another option.

Try temp agencies and look through the classifieds for employment opportunities. Good luck, I know how hard it is finding work these days.

Finally, I know exactly how it feels not knowing how you're gonna pay the bills. I've been there many times. All I know about that is that God knows when you're in trouble, and just when you think you'll never make it, he'll make a way. I'll say a prayer for ya Kae.

Look on the bright side, Kae. 'Least you don't have a ticket breathing down your neck, like I did.

...I never have the right words...
I'm praying for you, Kae. Every waking moment.

you're in my prayers man

I will be praying for for you.

Rather than start a new prayer thread, I figured I'd stick an update here on this thread.

My financial situation is fine now! Turns out, I'm not as much of an idiot as I thought...which isn't saying much, but still. Turns out I had a substantial amount of cash tucked away in my savings account that I COMPLETELY forgot about! So, now I have enough money to survive until I get my GI Bill benefits again!

The depression...well, that remains. But, the financial situation is no longer a problem!

God is awesome sometimes. Well, okay, He's awesome all the time. But sometimes more awesome than others.

^^ Oh, Kae, I knew it'd be alright. This is wonderful.

Woo-hoo!

:hits_s

Glad to hear things are good again, Kae!!! At least didn't have to give yourself up for medicine testing to survive.

I'm glad that God answered prayers about the money. As for the depression just don't forget that you are cared for no matter what. Even if nobody on the Earth seems to care God'll be there for you and that's worth a lot more than some person. I know it's hard looking for acceptance in God's eyes and not mans but it's something we need to do. If you feel the need to vent or whatever feel free to PM me.

i will pray for sure