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Talking to my pastor tommorow

PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 6:30 pm
by wilson1112000
There is this person at church who is the music minister. He is, to say the least, one of the most stryopical, hypocritical men in the world. He pushes people to hard, especially his own family, hurts people left to right, and dose not help when there is work to be done. He will hurt my church if he isn't stopped, so I am talking to my Pastor about this. The thing is, he is friends with the music minister in question. I never complained about people for years, and I have developed a numerous amount of restraint in the pass, but I was about to punch the guy last week at Vacation Bible School! (Which he was the head of!) He yelled at some of the kids from my youth that where helping out on a carnival at the end of last week, and actually made one of them cry! I am just so mad at him right now, so I ask you all to pray for two things. First, that I carry no anger for tommorow, so I can make my point made, and second that God's will be done for whatever happens.

Thank you for listening to my rant. :rant:

PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 6:59 pm
by shooraijin
So what are you planning to say to the pastor? Have you thought out the points you want to make?

PostPosted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 8:11 pm
by EireWolf
That is a hard situation. I'm praying for you and your church.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 12:24 am
by agasfas
Perhaps it may be a good idea to inform and make it aware to the pastor.

Have you tried talking to this individual yet about the problem you are having with him? Though if it's brought up in the wrong way, he may take that as some kind of personal attack on him. So, maybe talking to the pastor may be a good idea. Either way, I'll be praying that somehow this type of action is stopped one way or another.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 12:55 am
by Hephzibah
While this situation does seem rather bad, I would like to encourage you to continue to respect this man because he is in a position of authority.

Romans 13:1
Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.

I'm not saying what he is doing is right, but I am saying that you should respect him (ie obey him; not gossip about him, etc) because he has been placed in that position of authority. This isn't meant to be condeming you, its just that I have had problems with this in the past and I dont want to see you make the same mistakes ;)

I'll be praying for this situation.
God bless you matie!

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 1:16 am
by bigsleepj
Praying, Wilson.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 6:46 am
by Spiritsword
I second agasfas' point, you might consider talking to the music minister first, but God knows best. I will pray

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 7:46 am
by Rev. Doc
I would very much encourage you to hold any anger you may have for this individual and if and when you speak to your pastor, talk to him about wanting to help your minister of music. While it doesn't excuse behavior like this, there are things in this person's life that may be triggering the way he is acting. Those in vocational ministry have pressures that are placed upon them that many others don't have to face and that are very unique. While facing these pressures, very often they don't have anyone to talk to about them because if you do you run the risk of offending someone in the church. Therefore, keeping them bottled up for long lengths of time can result in it spilling over occasionally. This doesn't always have to deal with church related issues. There are other matters outside the church he may be dealing with. While we might think he should turn to the church with them, it is hard to because the individual may think that the church would not understand or that the church might think less of someone in the ministry having everyday problems (especially if they are in high profile ministries in the church).

However, it could also be this person's personality is clashing at a high level with others in the church. If this is the case, your pastor will know about it most likely and will be looking for a way to deal delicately with the problem. If that is the case I urge you to be patient until something can be worked out in love.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 9:47 am
by wilson1112000
To Shooraijin: I am planing on telling the pastor about how this person has affected the church, and me. There have been many times that he has "cornered" me after church to talk to me about makeing some creative writings for specials. Plus, he has called my house many times, at the last minuet, to "remind" people about suprise meetings at church, without putting into consideration that maybe, they are to busy and have current plans that cannot be changed at the last mineut. It got to the point that my family dose not pick up the phone when ever his name appears on the caller I.D. It is just a very frustrating time.

To Talame: Thank you for your concern, and I will put it into practice. I will try not to open a can of worms if it can be avoided.

To Agasfas and Spiritsword: Many people in the church have talked with him, one being my youth leader. He dose not appreciate criticism, and uses it at fule. He makes the people who talk to him, giveing helpful critism, and makes them look like the bad guy. In short, he dose not seem to be reasoned with.

To Rev. Doc: Thank you for your words of encouragement. In the past, I have had problems with my anger, but through God, I have been able to control it for an appropriat time.
The pastor, though, says he knows of no conflicts within the church. Some belive that he choses not to listen, or that he truely dose not know. I don't know which one it is, but it dose need to be delt with soon. I try to be sensitive to others feelings alot of the time, but there are so many that are hurt by it, that I begin to hurt in my heart. Now, I feel even more confused than ever.

To all: Thank you for your help in prayer. I will remain in prayer also.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 9:54 am
by EireWolf
Please let us know how it goes if you talk to your pastor.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 26, 2005 1:12 pm
by Syaoran
I hope that your porblem will be solved soon...I will pray for you as well.