CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

Well, this is kinda on a personal level... so... i might not let too much out

Around back in last november, i started talking to this girl who replied on my xanga once... from then on, we started talking to each other a lot... a fair amount... she was really nice, and a heart full of God. She would be very encouraging to me with school and stuff, and was my "shining star" for a lack of a better term

now, probably around... may.. i told her that, well... i had feelings for her... and that, if we were too meet one day in life... see how we could continue

Her, being the smart one with common sense, told me that... it wouldn't work out, various reasons. The 2 main ones being that... she was a couple states away (Me maryland and her new jersey) and that... I was too young

I didn't really agree with that I was too young(she was 2 years older than me) but whatever floats her boat eh

Later that may, i remember the date, Friday... okay i don't remember ^^;; she told me that she was shutting down her xanga, and was unable to use the internet much anymore...

I was... really sad, i remember during the entire school day I had a weird feeling in my gut... didn't know why... yadda yadda blah blah you get the picture

I sent her an email, my final goodbyes so to speak. She said that She wasn't leaving because of anything I did (what a relief) but was like a Promise to God, and so that she would make her parents happy and such..

I respected her wishes, and she we parted, she told me that "at first she was suspicious of me and stuff, and later she really started to trust me." And at times considered me more than a friend (i don't really know what that means, but im assuming she didn't have any feelings for me. If she did, what she did was right. Because i know that she's more wise than me, and knew that to do, while I didn't. I am glad that we parted in a positive way, without us at each other's throats though

Now for a long time i still had that feeling of false hope lingering inside of me... such thoughts like "Oh! Maybe one day i will meet her and we will be happy!" But i know thats all false and being blinded from being practical and rational...

After a while, with the help of some others, i got over that "last thread of hope" that I was clinging on too. And it was really hard, i had to do something I didn't want to do, but If I didn't it would of killed me even more

Now... occasionally, id start to miss her... such as when im browsing through my old emails, and see some of the convos I had with her. And Id start to miss her, and sometimes start to cry a little... and... it just hurts me alot. I also started to miss her today, and cried a little. Seeing her name on my buddy list reminded me of her. I really miss her

so... i just ask for prayer so I can feel more comforted with the Lord, thanks guys

All right, you got it.

But it really wouldn't hurt to get to know more females IRL.

Ingemar wrote:But it really wouldn't hurt to get to know more females IRL.

heh heh, they're scary, but I do know a lot of girls in real life... just that I don't really have a crush on all of them lol

Awww, im sorry Ry-chan. I'll be prayin for ya.

I know how you feel Had a similar thing happen but weirder I just wanted to go to prom with a good friend so I asked him if he wante to go as friends and he freaked on me like I was in love with him.

awwww....how cute!

I prayed for you!
It'll get better!

I'm having the same thing going on, except in Reverse.

I'm not *really'* crushing on anyone ( I try to stay away from falling in love online, but occasionally it slips. By a MUSLIM even! Pray for me People! Pwease!)

but this guy I sometimes chat with told me he's starting to crush on me (don't ask me how he got the guts...), since we've come really close, and stuff. Now the thing is: I don't crush on him back. ^^;
doesn't mean I don't live him! (I love everyone!)

but right now I'm busy ministering to him. He's totally intrigued by the end of days, lol. Pray for his salvation sometime when you're up to it.

'(or mybe even help me somehow, if you've got ICQ and can speak German! )

I'll pray for you too =)

Aw, that's sad. I hate when things like that happen to me. . . I'll pray you'll feel better and that God will either help you hang on or move on or something.

I'm really sorry to hear that, bro. It's so hard when stuff like that happens. Trust in the Lord and your expected end will be a joyous one, even though the circumstances are rough for now.

Lord God, I pray for my brother, that you would give him strength and a faith that hopes in the future that You have for him. Amen.

Poor Ryan.

Troubles of the heart are hard. I'll pray for you.

I have been down that road before as you have, MSP.

Just about all of the girls that I have ever had real feelings for were online. As much as it hurt, if I had to do it again, I would.

Just keep your chin up and your hopes alive. But also, don't wait too long and pass a chance on another fine lady too.

I will be praying for you and if you ever need to talk about it. You can pm me and we can talk on IM.


Wingzero22

A broken heart... Hey man, I know how you feel. I've had a few times that I've became emotionally close to someone and they didn't feel the same way (online and real). It can drain you at times. And to this day I still wonder... "what if?" I think we all do to an extent.

My only advice would to perhaps you should try not to read the emails. It may have many of your conversations you cherish, but reading over them may cause more heart ache while dealing with something like this. They harness both the good and sad memories to a point. I'm not saying get rid of her email adress; keep it in your address book for the future, but... yeah... Whatever you think you should do... As long as you have the memories in your heart, that's all that matters.

But yeah man, I'll keep you in my prayers bro. Remain strong.

Been there, am there, will pray.

You and I should talk some time.

Praying, MSP!

"I'll be praying for ya.."

oh no...so sorry...i'll pray cause i've been there too...it's hard and it hurts but it'll get better and God'll show you the way even if you don't get it at first...lots of love and i'll be prayin for ya! God Bless!

It's so hard to lose a good friend that way. A similar thing happened to me a year ago. My friend and I went on a youth group trip together and I brought a girl from school along. She mentioned going on a date with my friend while he was sitting right there. He got so embarrassed that he dove under the bus seat and I felt like I was going to vomit. We used to hang out every day for five years and over that time, we both (obviously) developed feelings for each other. After that strange experience our friendship was never the same. Then I moved away, and we lost contact. I think about him all the time but I'm not sure what to do about it now.

It's his birthday today. July 13th.

I have his address and phone number right here. I don't have the courage...

::sigh::

I'm praying for you, MSP. I will also pray that God will bring you another friend, not to take her place, but to encourage and give you new hope.

aww thanks guys ^^