CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

*sigh well i'm falling and i don't know how to get up or for that matter look up. I have stopped goin to the church i was goin to cuz i wasn't getting fed there and i felt like a hypocrite goin to church when i didn't feel close to God...

now i feel really far...i question everything ...i dunno it's wierd...i know he did what he did i know Jesus died for me...that flame will never die but i feel lost...i don't feel his closeness anymore like i once did....i just feel.....drained. heh i'm closest to Thomas i guess....

but ..i dunno it's wierd cuz i feel this way yet i would still go to my death proclaiming God's Magesty and the Death his son did for us...i guess i've messed up alot...i don't know how to forgive myself let alone ask God for forgivenes... i feel like he's dissapointed in me...prolly is...i just don't know what to do... but i also suffer from depression...it's a demon that's held me for a long time and i'm going to seek christian therapy for it..but well i need alot of prayer please *smile thanks guys

lost and needs the help of God above

girlninja

First of all, let me just say that it is perfectly natural to go through times when you do not feel emotionally close to God. Everyone experiences these times of spiritual dryness at some point in their life, and it does not necessarily mean that there is anything wrong in your relationship with God. Remember, everyone makes mistakes daily--God won't ever stop loving you or forgiving you when you ask:

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness (I John 1:9).

Also, I would like to encourage you to start attending church again, whether or not it means finding a different congregation. I can't stress enough how important it is to be around other believers--the Christian life was not meant to be alone. You should not feel ashamed of going to church when you do not feel close to God. Instead, try seeing it as an opportunity to turn back to him in whatever way you have failed; if you don't go to church because of problems in your spiritual life, it will only make things worse.

I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe (Ephesians 1:18). May the peace of Christ be with you.

In addition to what Kaori said, if you have depression issues, I would seek Christian Counseling. I attempted suicide and had to have God absolutely shatter me (think "break and remake" here) before I finally started going to my shrink. Praying for you.

yup, i am feelin ya.........

i have gone through the same thing..... things at church just didn't have the same feeling that they used to have......acctually what helped me is that when i was going through this period in my life, i made a decision that i was going to revive my prayer life.....it is such a good feeling when you know in your spirit that God is really listening on the other end of the line.....that basically what helped me..... it just brings everything that we practice, and everything that goes on at church back into the right perspective.....also, for me, i was struggling through a problem with pride, and it's such a humbling experience to get own on your knees by your bedside, and just feel like your have no control over even the little things that happen in our daily lives..... thats what helped me, because i was in a dry point in my christian life, and sincere prayer, i have found is one of the things that wil rekindle that relationship....just like in a relationship with someone of the other gender, communication is key, the same goes with God, and just like an earthly relationship will go sour without communication, would you like it if the other person forgot that you existed for an entire month? think how God feels when we forget him!, so will your relationship with God fail when we fail to put him first and foremost in every single aspect of our daily lives on this earth...........

i will pray that your heart will be opened into a greater understanding of your loving heavenly Father

~emerson~

i'll keep it in prayer, hang in there, I hit the road-blocks before too, just know you are not alone, you've got friends when you need them, and must of all, you've got God. He is always there to help and watch over you and guide you. I would reccomend highly returning to church, read your Bible and pray daily, and don't worry to much. God often uses bad events in our lives for the good and to bring us closer to Him. I know that from experience, we all fail frequently, but we just need to confess our sins to God and ask forgiveness and try to follow Him more and more. You'll be fine.

ya know..i think i have the hardest time with forgiving myself....heh before i became a christian i suffered from depression alot...and it's always lurked in the shadows..like a roller coaster..it takes hold and just won't let go... I've prayed to have it banished and well *shrug* i dunno...

Kaori wrote:First of all, let me just say that it is perfectly natural to go through times when you do not feel emotionally close to God. Everyone experiences these times of spiritual dryness at some point in their life, and it does not necessarily mean that there is anything wrong in your relationship with God. Remember, everyone makes mistakes daily--God won't ever stop loving you or forgiving you when you ask:

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness (I John 1:9).

Very true!

[quote="Kaori"]Also, I would like to encourage you to start attending church again, whether or not it means finding a different congregation. I can't stress enough how important it is to be around other believers--the Christian life was not meant to be alone. You should not feel ashamed of going to church when you do not feel close to God. Instead, try seeing it as an opportunity to turn back to him in whatever way you have failed] Yes! Staying connected with the body is crucial!

I know how you feel, girlninja. I will be praying for you.

aw, hon, hang in there. i myself suffer from depression, and am just coming away from having a small bout last week.

girlninja wrote: I have stopped goin to the church i was goin to cuz i wasn't getting fed there and i felt like a hypocrite goin to church when i didn't feel close to God...

i agree that you should try going again, and if the church you were going to wasn't working, find something new. as children of God, we have two parts to our relationship with Him that must both be there for our relationship to work like it was meant to be: 1 - personal relationship: your own alone time with God, prayers, meditations, devotions, reading the Bible, etc. 2 - fellowship relationship: worshiping with a group, Bible study group, etc. finding a church that you are comfortable with is very important.

me, i go to two different services a week, a more traditional service at a Methodist church (which is what i grew up going to) on sundays, and a more contemporary service, Campus Crusades, on wednesdays. i found this method works really well for me, and when i had to skip Crusades last week to get a final project done, i felt really crappy the rest of the week, until i went to church on sunday. i also go to a Bible study every week with some girls in my dorm, which i also really enjoy doing, and has helped me to open up a lot more in groups, something i've always had troubles with.

but you have to find a method that works well for you. although i wouldn't normally recommend it, and i don't recommend at all doing it for very long, you might try going to a few different churches over the next few weeks to find something you like.

girlninja wrote:but ..i dunno it's wierd cuz i feel this way yet i would still go to my death proclaiming God's Magesty and the Death his son did for us...i guess i've messed up alot...i don't know how to forgive myself let alone ask God for forgivenes... i feel like he's dissapointed in me...prolly is...i just don't know what to do...

hon, God ALWAYS loves you, and is just waiting for you to ask Him for forgiveness, in fact He's already given it to you. the hardest part of forgiving yourself is your conscience... it keeps agonizing over and over and over things that don't need to be agonized over. i know that when it comes to forgiving myself, i first go through a time of beating myself up over it, and then have a knock-down-drag-out fight with my conscience to let go of it.

hang in there. to become stronger in our faith with God, we first need to get broken. we need to have our little grimy fingers torn away from the sinful life they are holding so tightly to, so that we can be given something so much better we can't even begin to imagine it.

and if you ever need to talk, i always try to check my mail daily, am on CAA almost daily, and can get on MSN messenger or AIM. i do believe the info is in my profile, or you can PM me for it.

God Bless you. i'll be praying.

I'll pray.