i (ctgirl) need prayer...

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i (ctgirl) need prayer...

Postby c.t.,girl » Sun Mar 27, 2005 2:06 am

yah...as you've seen...i've been asking for prayers for friends that cut and stuff like that...but...tonight...i did it again...i cut my wrist...it didn't bleed at all though...i don't know why though...i mean...i have no want for it...although...i sometimes still do just...get the urge to though...but...there's no point in doing it...i mean...other than my friends(cutting)/brother(walked away from God)/dad(is slipping from God and is just a jerk sometimes)/grandparents(dying from diseases)/grades(failing 3 classes)/dizziness and can't focus(gets really bad sometimes)/back(is really messed up) i don't really have a reason to kill myself...(btw pray for all those things ^^) yet...i still get that little urge to just...give up...and no...i'm not gunna talk to my mom...or my dad for that matter(he's the last person on earth that i would tell anything to)...yah...and...i've talked to my pastors...but...they never say anything to me...and my friends...well..yah. man...if i didn't believe that God was real, i wouldn't have a reason to stay alive! yah...so...yah...plz...just pray for me...thanks...
[color="DarkOrange"]"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things... hey... the good things don't always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant." -11th Doctor

"The advice I like to give young artists, or really anybody who’ll listen to me, is not to wait around for inspiration. Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work. If you wait around for the clouds to part and a bolt of lightning to strike you in the brain, you are not going to make an awful lot of work. All the best ideas come out of the process; they come out of the work itself. Things occur to you. If you’re sitting around trying to dream up a great art idea, you can sit there a long time before anything happens. But if you just get to work, something will occur to you and something else will occur to you and something else that you reject will push you in another direction. Inspiration is absolutely unnecessary and somehow deceptive. You feel like you need this great idea before you can get down to work, and I find that’s almost never the case." - Chuck Close[/color]
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Postby enishi » Sun Mar 27, 2005 2:16 am

ill pray for you ctgirl.
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Mar 27, 2005 2:47 am

I'll be praying ctgirl! Seriously, you should see a counseller. A Christian one preferably.
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Postby TrigunX89 » Sun Mar 27, 2005 3:13 am

Hang in there, ctgirl! We all love ya! I'll keep you in my prayers! Though I've never cut, I think I know how you feel. Life can be so difficult... Just hang in there. God will help you through. We all care about you deeply too.

As we reach Easter, I'm reminded all the more how much Jesus loves us. He paid the uiltimate price for us, even though we didn't deserve it. I know He cares about you too, and hates to see you suffer.

Just hold on. Things will get better in time. Even if it seems you have nothing to live for, you do. God has a plan for you. He can do things in your life greater than you can imagine.

I'll be praying.
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Postby Heart of Sword » Sun Mar 27, 2005 4:50 am

I'll be praying for you. Hang in there.

But you should see a Christian counselor. Depression is usually due to a chemical imbalance in the brain and you might need medication. No offense at all, just advice.
Heart of Sword's Rhapsody

Money, get away
Get a good job with good pay and you're okay
And all and all you're just another brick in the wall
Shoutin’ in the street gonna take on the world some day
But Bismallah will not let me go
Because I'll see you on the dark side of the moon

Tommy used to work on the docks
Union's been on strike
Bright eyes burning like fire
And exposing every weakness
However carefully hidden by the kids

Who will love a little Sparrow
Who's traveled far and cries for rest
Spare him his life from this monstrosity

I've seen a million faces and I've rocked them all
And if the band youre in starts playing different tunes
We will we will rock you
We will we will rock you!

[Pink Floyd fan listening to Queen and hugging trees which is also known as taking care of God's creation with a pair of headphones on listening to Nightwish as loud as possible while writing a novel on a computer in the middle of a field filled with Wolves.]

[Bassist...finally learning Money]
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Postby Hitokiri » Sun Mar 27, 2005 10:02 am

I will be praying for you c.t. girl. Though I have never cut myself, I have carved words (I have the word "Fallen" still carved in my arm from 4 years ago) in my arm and stab myself with pencils; I can relate that sometimes....it relieve you. I have been depressed most of my life and when you're like that, you really see no alternative motive unless you put your faith in Christ. Trust God and put your hope in him. I will be praying.
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Postby AngelSakura » Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:04 am

Don't forget, Chris, you promised me you wouldn't give up. I would be devestated if you killed yourself. I'll pray for you.
Think happy thoughts.
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Postby agasfas » Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:05 am

there's no point in doing it...i mean...other than my friends(cutting)/brother(walked away from God)/dad(is slipping from God and is just a jerk sometimes)/grandparents(dying from diseases)/grades(failing 3 classes)/dizziness and can't focus(gets really bad sometimes)/back(is really messed up) i don't really have a reason to kill myself...(btw pray for all those things ^^) yet...i still get that little urge to just...give up..


You really shouldn't let things that are out of your control bring you down. I wont lie and say everything in life is easy to put up with, but we have to learn to live w/ change and difficult situations. Humans have a way on focusing on all the negatives rather them the positives ((no matter how few it may be). For example, I remember in the past a teacher told the class to write on a piece of paper 10 good things and 10 bad things about ourselves.
You know what, all 20-something people had the hardest time thinking of 10 good things. Everyone found it so much easier to find the 10 bad.

Everyone has something about them they wish they could change... Some of them we can and some we can't. Although it may hurt you to see your friends cutting themselves, family members leaving God you shouldn't take it out on yourself because we can only do so much. No matter how much advice or help we give or offer, in the end of the night it's their own choice to do whatever they do... Kind of sucks, but it's reality.

Anyways, always try to look for the good things about yourself. If we always focus on the bad, which I've done most of my life... then we only make ourselves more depressed. Do whatever you can to concentrate more on the good things. We all have some good things and people who do care for us.

Kind of random, and I doubt this goes anywhere, but I remember a quote from Kenshin that really made sense. "You can die anytime, but living takes courage."
And it's true, living takes courage, courage to stick it out and fight through all the bad. Life can never get better if we don't allow it to (or give it a chance).

Anyways, sorry if my comments were totally random and most likely incoherent... But I just want you to be happy w/ yourself. And if you don't feel you can talk to people at church, parent or friends... well you always have people here at CAA that do care; as does God. I will continue to keep you in my prayers. Keep smiling.
"A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.." Prov 17:22

The word 'impossible' isn't in my dictionary... but I don't really have a dictionary you know? - Eikichi Onizuka.
Sorry, but I stop being a teacher at 5 o'clock. - Eikichi Onizuka.
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Postby Jman » Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:09 am

I'll pray!

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Postby c.t.,girl » Sun Mar 27, 2005 1:00 pm

thanks everyone...-_-
[color="DarkOrange"]"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things... hey... the good things don't always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant." -11th Doctor

"The advice I like to give young artists, or really anybody who’ll listen to me, is not to wait around for inspiration. Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work. If you wait around for the clouds to part and a bolt of lightning to strike you in the brain, you are not going to make an awful lot of work. All the best ideas come out of the process; they come out of the work itself. Things occur to you. If you’re sitting around trying to dream up a great art idea, you can sit there a long time before anything happens. But if you just get to work, something will occur to you and something else will occur to you and something else that you reject will push you in another direction. Inspiration is absolutely unnecessary and somehow deceptive. You feel like you need this great idea before you can get down to work, and I find that’s almost never the case." - Chuck Close[/color]
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Postby CreatureArt » Sun Mar 27, 2005 2:24 pm

You rock, CT. I agree with what's been said above: we love you and don't give up. Will be praying for you. Hang in there.
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Postby Jaltus-bot » Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:21 pm

CreatureArt wrote:You rock, CT. I agree with what's been said above: we love you and don't give up. Will be praying for you. Hang in there.

Yeah, that. :hug:
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Postby CephasWhite » Sun Mar 27, 2005 11:34 pm

I'm PMing you c.t.girl.
Two Steps From Hell - Tristan <--(click)
†††††††††††††
We have been here long enough to know
That we are all brothers and sisters in Christ,
So if you are in need of help,
We shall give you His advice.

May God add his blessings upon you,
That you will live this day and forever,
And when He comes to the earth again,
We will all go together...

Into Heaven for Eternity...


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Postby c.t.,girl » Mon Mar 28, 2005 4:19 am

i just thought i'd let yall know i'm doing much better...and Cephas...what you said is exactly what i needed to hear...again...i'm sorry about all this and worrying you guys again...i promise you all that i won't let this rule my life...i luv yall so much...^^ and thank you for caring.

~chris
[color="DarkOrange"]"The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things... hey... the good things don't always soften the bad things; but vice-versa the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant." -11th Doctor

"The advice I like to give young artists, or really anybody who’ll listen to me, is not to wait around for inspiration. Inspiration is for amateurs; the rest of us just show up and get to work. If you wait around for the clouds to part and a bolt of lightning to strike you in the brain, you are not going to make an awful lot of work. All the best ideas come out of the process; they come out of the work itself. Things occur to you. If you’re sitting around trying to dream up a great art idea, you can sit there a long time before anything happens. But if you just get to work, something will occur to you and something else will occur to you and something else that you reject will push you in another direction. Inspiration is absolutely unnecessary and somehow deceptive. You feel like you need this great idea before you can get down to work, and I find that’s almost never the case." - Chuck Close[/color]
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