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My life is falling apart
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:05 am
by Jman
I Just found out everyone at my school wants me to leave, I mean this is my first year in a school (I've always been homeschooled) and everyone wants me to leave and I have no clue why, but they won't tell me face to face, they've all been putting on a show pretending to be my friend and all, I mean I just don't feel like living anymore, is it really worth it?
stay strong
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:15 am
by Spike20032
Jman wrote:I Just found out everyone at my school wants me to leave, I mean this is my first year in a school (I've always been homeschooled) and everyone wants me to leave and I have no clue why, but they won't tell me face to face, they've all been putting on a show pretending to be my friend and all, I mean I just don't feel like living anymore, is it really worth it?
I know exactly how you feel. I was an outcast from 4th grade to 9th because everyone at the school I went to were full of stuck up snobs who's parents bought them everything. I hated it too, but I stayed strong in my faith that God was just trying to make me stronger. After my first month of high school: 9th grade, I moved to a new neighborhood and made a ton of friends. After being away from my old school for 5 years, I went back to some of the friends I made before I left. Everyone of them except the people I made friends with are either in jail or pregnant or paying child support from a dead end job. And I am currently starting my career in the Navy. I am better off than they are. Just remain strong and find people you can relate too. Thats what I did at the new school I went to, and I made more friends than I can remember. Just stay strong and push foward. People who put others down have no right to talk in the first place.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:22 am
by Mr. SmartyPants
patience friend. Even if other reject you, God is still there with open arms and a BIG smile
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:22 am
by jazz
aww man, that stinks. i dont completely know where you are coming from. up ti'll grade eight-ish, the people in my school were content with just making my life horrible. eventually i left and homeschooled. . . .so i guess i can kinda sympathize. i dont have any advice to give, but i wanted you to know that i will be praying for you.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:40 am
by Jaltus-bot
I’ll pray that things work out for you and the people at your school.
It’ll be ok. May I ask how do you know that this is how they feel? I was homeschooled first through twelfth and when I started youth group at church and didn’t really know anyone there, people seemed nice but eventually I wondered if anyone there actually cared about whether I was there or not. Is there any chance that it is a maturity thing on their part or is it definitely a malicious thing?
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:47 am
by Jman
Joan, I have a few AOL Instant messenger Screennames, I IMed my friends there that I am close to...well they preteneded to be. I asked them whats they thought of Josh S. and they all said he was a freak of nature.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:51 am
by Syreth
Sir, I'll be praying for you. I often feel like this, since my personality makes me apt to make a few close friends, rather than many friends. I often wonder what other people think about me, and suspect that some may dislike me, however, the Lord is sufficient, even in times where you don't feel like you have any friends at school or wherever you might be. Not only that, it's still true that He knows the desires of your heart and wants to do what's best for you. I'll pray that you'll make it through this and be stronger and even make a few good friends along the way.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 11:20 am
by Jaltus-bot
Ouch. Extra hug.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 11:32 am
by Doubleshadow
People are horrible, JMan. Why would you want friends like that anyhow? I've told many heartbroken friends of mine who've been betrayed that people, even your truest friends, will ultimately let you down because people aren't perfect. Keep looking for friends JMan, God will almost certainly have friends for you somewhere (I won't say definately because I'm not God and can't say that). You may never have friends at school, but school is not the only place to find friends. What about scouts, sports, youth groups, 4-H or an all age service organization like Habitat for Humanity?
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 6:25 pm
by Rogie
Kids can be cruel, but with God on your side, you have a lot of support that you may not realize! I'll pray for you.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 6:35 pm
by Godly Paladin
Jman wrote:I mean I just don't feel like living anymore, is it really worth it?
Don't even start thinking like that, man... Hang in there and we will all be praying for you.
Doubleshadow has a good suggestion there, too. School is not the universe...you can find friendly people in other places.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 7:24 pm
by Spirit_Wolf8356
I'll be praying for you, Jman. *hug* If you need anyone to talk to, I'm around.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 8:29 pm
by agasfas
they've all been putting on a show pretending to be my friend and all, I mean I just don't feel like living anymore, is it really worth it?
Hey man, no one said public schooling was going to be easy. When you're at home you really have no worries and one remains sheltered from the real world in a sense. Public schooling is a small taste of the real world. There will be others with different beliefs, likes and dislikes. There will be people how like you and others who hate you for no reason. It's sad, but it's the real world. But, you will learn some lessons that you can't learn at home. People, kids to be certain can be so cruel. I would know, I was teased growing up all my life because my hair would fell out for in random patches. It looked so horrible and goofy. Kids talked behind my back, teased me... even infront of me. I got in a few fights because of it. But you know what, people grow up.
Let me assure you, no matter how bad it seems there will always be people who do care for you. Even if you don't think so. How long have you been in public school? My advise is to just give it some time. Sometimes it takes a while for the people to get used to the new kid. Continue to put yourself out there and keep picking yourself up. It's all about how you carry yourself.
Jesus faced such adversity in his life. He was cursed at, beaten, spit on and put to death. His whole life Jesus had to fight for what's right. He was tempted by Satan himself and never gave in. Was his life worth it? I can assure you that Jesus thinks his whole life on earth was worth it.
Don't be afraid to put yourself out there. If you don't then you will never get the respect of your peers. Show people youre character. So is it all worth it? Well that's all how you see it. Life is a struggle... I don't think anyone can deny that fact. What you put in is what you get out. If you run, then you gain nothing. If you fight, life will be more fulfilling... Hardly anything is given to us on a silver platter--even friendship.
So people only act like they are trying to be friendly. I would concider you lucky really. Some aren't even given that much. Some are tormented: beat up, teased etc... My guess is that perhaps your reading more into it then you need to. Perhaps you're assuming they don't like you, and in reality some do. People are hard to read sometimes.
What happens next is solely up to you. You can either fight- putting yourself out there, or you can run. Like I've said before, life is a struggle. I don't think you should let this one thing get you down for the long run. Give it some time and I know you'll meet some more people who generally care for you. It may not be tomorrow, but it will happen. Trust me.
I don't think it's fair for you or others to make such rash decisions about whether your life is worth it or not. You can't always think that way whenever something bad happens. This is only middle school, you still have your whole life in head of you. My question is how will you react to more difficult situations in life? LIfe is full of hurt but you need to remain strong. Homeschooling is not a subsitute for learning life lessons. Don't be afraid of failure, that's the only way one can learn. We learn and grow from every experience. Don't measure yourself to others or stop yourself short in life. You will never get anywhere doing so. Sometimes we perceive things worse then they are...
My example would be:
I remember giving a speech in class. The teacher was videotaping everyone. It seemed everyone did better then me... I really thought mine ws horrible. Then after everyone finished we watched the tape next class period. After watching others from another view point, mine wasn't as bad as I thought. I even got a higher grade then someone I thought had a better presentation. Sometimes we preceive things differently then they are.
I'm not saying people do or don't like you, but sometimes things aren't what they appear.
What really matters is how you carry yourself. Continue pick yourself up and smile, it'll do some good. I'll be praying for ya, take care man.
Edit: Anytime you feel down try talking to Jesus. He cares greatly for you and wishes for you to be happy. It may seem be hard to face, but with Jesus, anything is possible. He only wants what is best for you.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 17, 2005 10:48 pm
by Yahshua
6In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so that your faith–of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire–may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.
Ah my dear brother althought you are facing trials of many kinds in the Public school remember what the First Peter Chapter one verse Six to Seven says and remember this you are a child of light in light there is no darkness that as an child of light we can never surrender and remember this even thou this world hate you that Father in Heaven always loves you and nothing I mean nothing can separate from that love so don't give up continue to press on and as always I loves you deeply and that is not something I pretended to be so Just because He lives life is worth living.
Yes my brother life in Public school will be a battleground I know this full well my dear brother that I have been through it currently I am in a public university call The University of Washington Seattle in there it is tearing me apart sometimes where the professors and fellow students want me to be in the darkness but the Heavenly Father want me to be in the light it create in me a deep emotional and mental pain but as I says I will not surrender and neither should you. We need to fight the fight of the faith. And always has the words of God in your heart my brother Jman. And know this 12Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. 13But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. 14If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. 15If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. 16However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. 17For it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? 18And, “If it is hard for the righteous to be saved,
what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?â€
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2005 7:15 am
by Jman
agasfas wrote:Hey man, no one said public schooling was going to be easy. When you're at home you really have no worries and one remains sheltered from the real world in a sense. Public schooling is a small taste of the real world. There will be others with different beliefs, likes and dislikes. There will be people how like you and others who hate you for no reason. It's sad, but it's the real world. But, you will learn some lessons that you can't learn at home. People, kids to be certain can be so cruel. I would know, I was teased growing up all my life because my hair would fell out for in random patches. It looked so horrible and goofy. Kids talked behind my back, teased me... even infront of me. I got in a few fights because of it. But you know what, people grow up.
Let me assure you, no matter how bad it seems there will always be people who do care for you. Even if you don't think so. How long have you been in public school? My advise is to just give it some time. Sometimes it takes a while for the people to get used to the new kid. Continue to put yourself out there and keep picking yourself up. It's all about how you carry yourself.
Jesus faced such adversity in his life. He was cursed at, beaten, spit on and put to death. His whole life Jesus had to fight for what's right. He was tempted by Satan himself and never gave in. Was his life worth it? I can assure you that Jesus thinks his whole life on earth was worth it.
Don't be afraid to put yourself out there. If you don't then you will never get the respect of your peers. Show people youre character. So is it all worth it? Well that's all how you see it. Life is a struggle... I don't think anyone can deny that fact. What you put in is what you get out. If you run, then you gain nothing. If you fight, life will be more fulfilling... Hardly anything is given to us on a silver platter--even friendship.
So people only act like they are trying to be friendly. I would concider you lucky really. Some aren't even given that much. Some are tormented: beat up, teased etc... My guess is that perhaps your reading more into it then you need to. Perhaps you're assuming they don't like you, and in reality some do. People are hard to read sometimes.
What happens next is solely up to you. You can either fight- putting yourself out there, or you can run. Like I've said before, life is a struggle. I don't think you should let this one thing get you down for the long run. Give it some time and I know you'll meet some more people who generally care for you. It may not be tomorrow, but it will happen. Trust me.
I don't think it's fair for you or others to make such rash decisions about whether your life is worth it or not. You can't always think that way whenever something bad happens. This is only middle school, you still have your whole life in head of you. My question is how will you react to more difficult situations in life? LIfe is full of hurt but you need to remain strong. Homeschooling is not a subsitute for learning life lessons. Don't be afraid of failure, that's the only way one can learn. We learn and grow from every experience. Don't measure yourself to others or stop yourself short in life. You will never get anywhere doing so. Sometimes we perceive things worse then they are...
My example would be:
I remember giving a speech in class. The teacher was videotaping everyone. It seemed everyone did better then me... I really thought mine ws horrible. Then after everyone finished we watched the tape next class period. After watching others from another view point, mine wasn't as bad as I thought. I even got a higher grade then someone I thought had a better presentation. Sometimes we preceive things differently then they are.
I'm not saying people do or don't like you, but sometimes things aren't what they appear.
What really matters is how you carry yourself. Continue pick yourself up and smile, it'll do some good. I'll be praying for ya, take care man.
Edit: Anytime you feel down try talking to Jesus. He cares greatly for you and wishes for you to be happy. It may seem be hard to face, but with Jesus, anything is possible. He only wants what is best for you.
Your wrong man, this isn't a public school, thats the bad part....its a christian school
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2005 7:28 am
by Mangafanatic
Jman wrote:Your wrong man, this isn't a public school, thats the bad part....its a christian school
Actually, I have it from quite a few source that those are often worse. You see, a majority of the kids who are sent to Christian school are the trouble makers whose parents want to get their children's lives in order. So they yank them out of public school and stuff 'em in a private Christian school thinking that, naturally, that's gonna change everything. In Christian schools it's the good kids and the REALLY bad kids.
I'm so sorry to hear what's going on. Having home schooled myself, I can sympathize with how hard the transition must be for you. I go to a co-op a couple days a week so I've had a pretty strong taste of how sickeningly mean kids can be. So sorry. I'll be praying for you! And don't ever give up!
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2005 8:05 am
by CobaltAngel
*hug* I'm so sorry to hear that. Kids around that age are idiotic. And like Osaka said, Christian schools are all th super conseritive kids, and the really really bad kids. I'll pray for you, for sure. God will use these trials you face now to make you stronger in the fucture. Don't ever even think of giving up on life! Trust me, I know how much life can suck, but quitting is never the answer. ^^
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2005 8:06 am
by agasfas
Your wrong man, this isn't a public school, thats the bad part....its a christian school
My apologies for assuming, but my point was that both public and private schools have that problem... It's a different socal environment you would get from home -- schools are filled with more adversity. Regardless, of what kind of school it is, problems like tha arise. There are some who hate others for no reasons. It's a hateful world out ther indeed. But if you hide your head in the sand all day, nothing will change. You should not want a friend that arises from sympathy, that's not true friendship. You want someone that likes you for you and not guilt.
So what if some of them don't like you for you, that's their loss. Do you really want a half hearted friend anyways? You don't need friends like that. I'm sure there are other people at the school that would like you for you. But you will never know if you don't put yourself out there with the chance of getting hurt. Life if full of hurt but you can't let that discourage you. Keep hanging in there.
People are all different. Some will hate you, some will like you. Some have a good heart, others don't. Not everyone is a caring christian. CAA is a place to get to know one another and share common belifes... you can come here for help/comfort or just to chit-chat, but it's not a substitute for reality. Sad but true.
Though, I know if you carry yourself right, people will like you for you. Don't let a few people change that about you. Show others your true character. Building good strong friendships doesn't happen overnight... most of the time they take time to mold and grow. Also, sometimes we meet our good friends in places you would even think. Me and my bestfriend used to despise one another. Until we had a mutual classmate invite us to his party. He needed another person to play pool with so he asked me if I wanted to join. We became good friends shortly after, and 9yrs later we are still close friends. So don't get yourself down because you think others don't like you, your time will come so don't fret too much.
Please, my only advice is to continue to pick yourself up and stand tall. You will find good friends, but everything requires time and patience. Patience is virtue, it really is. Smiling helps too..
I'll keep praying for ya.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 18, 2005 8:31 am
by Jman
Thanks every.
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 5:04 pm
by Hephzibah
I have been in Christian schools most of my life, and allow me to elaborate on some thigns I have noticed while in them.
1) Just as Mangafanatic said, there are alot of Really bad kids in there
2) Even the so called 'good kids' are often judgemental and have the 'I am a better Christian than you' attitude. It seems taht if you dont go to so many prayer meetings or what-not, you are condemned and called a weak Christian.
The only advice I can offer is for you continue to trust God, and pray that He sends one or two really good friends. I'll be praying for you matie
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:10 pm
by Hitokiri
I will pray for you. I agree with what Mangafanatic said that just cause it's a Christian school doesn't mean everyone is Christian nor acts Christ like. I had a friend who was homeschooled and attended several calsses. He wasn't accepted by the entire school board cause he was part homeschool and the school frowns on it (cause they get homeschoolers school fee cut supposidly).
Well..my friend pulled out after recieeving several threats from kids and several of these threads were death threats. I saw one of them that almost had a occultic sound to it.
Also, I assume you are in middle school J-Man? Everyone and thier sister will tell you that junior high was the most worst part of thier teenage life and I will agree. But stay true with God and keep your focus on Him. Your friends may leave you but God never will. And you got us ^_^
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:20 pm
by YoukoKuramaFan
hi!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:21 pm
by Heart of Sword
Ah, but WE don't want you to leave!!!!
Yep, I've been through the same thing. I was always sort of an outcast (okay, so maybe more than sort of--it was my fault), but I didn't really care much, I was just trying to survive school.
I was kind of...uh...notorious...yep. That's right. Me, notorious. (Strange, eh? But I wasn't mean. I was just...very strong-willed, and I interrupted a few fights, so I was more of a "hero" to the kids I'd helped out, but more of an "enemy" to the kids who I'd stood up too. And most of the kids were "enemies", so you can only imagine what school was like for this one.
)
I was used a lot too, and sometimes I didn't know it--I know how you feel. I had "friends" but they turned out to be spies from another "clique" (I hate cliques) who were following me around, looking for things to "tell" on me about.
I was probably an outcast for different reasons then you, tho', so I don't know if I can help much, except......
Your life's worth it. If it weren't, why would we all be talking to you???
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:24 pm
by YoukoKuramaFan
soo...what are you guys talking abuot... and im waiting for your replies Heart ofSword!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:27 pm
by YoukoKuramaFan
pleese would some one clue me in? im bored!!
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:28 pm
by Hephzibah
Sorry, youko, but this is a prayer request thread. Maybe you should try reading the first post to see what it is we are discussing and praying for.
Edit:
Please dont use the prayer request threads for general discussions. A good place to do that is the Goof Off area, or the Main area.
PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2005 6:34 pm
by Swordguy
Matt 5
43“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor[h] and hate your enemy.’ 44But I tell you: Love your enemies[i] and pray for those who persecute you,
even though it is a christain school doesn't mean that all follow Christ...pray for them...and show them love.
45that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?
PostPosted: Sat Jan 22, 2005 7:44 am
by Jman
Things and Getting better now, I'm hanging out with a few kids and Yes this is a Middle School
PostPosted: Sat Jan 22, 2005 8:32 am
by termyt
Humans have a long history of treating each other rather poorly and it seems amplified in during the teenage years. It seems that teenagers are struggling to define themselves, so they look for acceptance from others and they also seek others that they can feel superior to. Both of these are key to developing their own feeling of self worth.
Adults do the same thing, but after adulthood, these things seem less important for most people, so they have less of an effect on them.
I am sorry you are bearing the brunt of this. Knowing any of this does little to soften the blow or heal hurt feelings. Please remember you are not alone. God is preparing you for what is to come. Learn from it and know that these people have no power over you save what you give them.
You are valuable. Your worth is derived from God and the people who care for you, not the people who stand to gain from you pleasure or your pain. Hang in there, Jman. I’ll be rooting for you.
PostPosted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 7:48 pm
by Lady Arianrod
I was also something of an outcast in middle school... I didn't have many friends and I was often 'used' for answers, projects, etc. However, I was never truly a target of kids like those in your school.... I barely had a sense of self then.
I will pray that you can feel God's love, JMan, and that you will forge strong, lasting friendships with people you can trust.
I hope that all will turn out well for you. You'll be in my prayers.