CAA: Christian Anime Alliance

I don't know what my problem is... I've been dealing with so much sin lately and today the dam broke... I confessed pretty much everything I could think of to my gf and friend... and I'm not going to confess it all here again, because that's not my problem...

3 people have told me in the past 3 or 4 days that I have a problem, and that problem is that I cannot forgive myself for what I do. I don't know how... I keep beating myself up for what all I've done and I can't stop... can someone tell me what's wrong with me?

Don't worry frwl, you're not alone when it comes to this. I had a problem very much like what you have described... I had done so many stupid mistakes and felt like I was letting God down every day. I was beating myself up about it too, and it made me rather depressed, esp since I couldn't stop.

However, one Sunday the pastor gave a sermon about how the past doesn't have to rule your life... each day is a brand new day. God is willing to forgive the past, to take away the guilt and help you grow closer to Him, to learn from the previous mistakes. I took this to heart, and although I still make mistakes, I am at peace because I know that God has forgiven me... I am His beloved. He can do the exact same thing with you frwl... I'm not going to say its easy... its taken me a few months, but trust me, its well worth it. The peace God gives is so amazing. God loves you frwl, even though you may not feel like He does.

I'll be praying for you, brother. I've struggled with the same issues before myself. Something I've learned recently is that God is not concerned so much with what we've done in the past, but where do we stand with Him now? Are we on the right track with Him, now? There is a verse somewhere (can't remember) that says, "Today is the day of salvation." And in Hebrews, "Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts." God is willing to forgive a lifetime of sin if we will just turn to Him with our whole heart and trust in His forgiveness, and in turn, we will forgive ourselves.

i will be praying bro

There was a portion of my past that I'm not very proud of, which only a couple of my very close friends know about. Even today I struggle with the issue of forgiveness about it, because even though I know God has forgiven me, and the person involved said I'm forgiven, I'm inclined to keep beating myself over the head with it.

The point is, though, it's a sin that's over and done with. I can't undo the sin, but I can keep from having it happen again, and I've sought the forgiveness of those involved, including God Himself (who already gave it to me; I just have to accept it).

If it's a sin that you feel drawn or attracted to, the temptation is not a sin as long as you recognize it for the temptation it is, and don't give in to it. I suspect I have some idea what you're struggling with, and one way I know others have helped to conquer it is being accountable to someone you trust, who understands the struggle, doesn't judge you for it, and wants you to change. I know God will help bring you one to challenge you. Alcoholics Anonymous uses sponsors to give support to their members. You could do something similar if you feel you might lapse again, but you have to take that step.

God gives us more grace, and that's a real comforting thought to know He cares even when we think we're not worth Him caring about.

I'll keep you in prayer.

I'm dealing with the same sort of thing right now, even though they're all little things, I feel like I'm letting God down because I say I'm sorry for these things then just turn around and do them again. I wonder at night whether I'm really serious or not when I'm apologizing, but at the same time I really want to change. I go in the circle for what feels like forever and I'm still working through it, but nonetheless I'll pray for you. I'll pray you can work your way to the answer with God and your pastors and such. Hopefully we'll both get there. Its so easy to say that God's forgiven me, but its an entire other realm to accept it yourself. I'll be praying.